


To the Sea

by marykiddread



Category: Assassin's Creed
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-17
Updated: 2015-08-13
Packaged: 2018-02-21 14:14:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 59,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2471156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marykiddread/pseuds/marykiddread
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>-Modern AU- Mary has spent months aboard a frigate in the US Navy without any problems gaining the trust of those she meets. Everything is going well until she finds herself getting a little too close with Edward Kenway.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Smart Mouthed

The warm sea breeze tussles my pulled up hair as the ship propels through the coastal waters. The separation between sea and sky are almost nonexistent, all just looking an endless blue.

This is not my first time at sea. Not for a long shot. I grew up by it and I've always known i'd join the navy once of age. 

Something about it has always fascinated me. It's wild and unpredictable pulling some under with the tides and others drifting on top. The ocean is a wild mistress that has had me in her grasp since she took my cousin.

He was one of those that was pulled under and since then all I've wanted to do was tame her. Now that I'm on a ship I've realized it's harder that's thought initially.

I don't have as much privacy while changing and everything I bring is sifted through so all feminine hygiene items are a no go. 

We never had enough money to take me to a doctor when I was younger and as far as they all knew I was just James. When I first joined I spend a lot of time avoiding physicals but I met a nurse their who I'd known for a time when I was little. Lauren is her name, with a poker face that can trick any man or woman, forged my papers.

Legally I've been named James Kidd after taking his place when my aunt had to have a child to pass off as her own to her deceased husbands mother. My mother died long ago and my father was nowhere to be found. I was just another child of the state. 

I've moved on. Grew up and found a purpose. 

Our ship is small compared to the others but that's just because it is only for protecting other ships in the convoy coming out around the Caribbean. 

"Check the sonars Kidd," a gruff man say to me pulling me away from my work of calibrating our location. "Captains orders. Have fun putting up with Kenway."

He's a tall man, with a ruff gravelly voice. His name is Vane. Charles, I think, but it's not the most professional thing to call them by their first name. He is a lower rank than I but he likes to pretend he's above everyone.

I walk away with just a nod of understanding, moving down the stairs into the metal hull. I walk past groups of men and women alike down another flight of stairs, to a locked door. 

I knock against the cold gray metal and hear footsteps approach from the other side. The door sings open towards the man and I'm greeted by the young blond officer that I've taken under my wing for the past four months. 

"Hey Kidd. Couldn't stay away could you?" He laughs.

"Hardly Kenway," I roll my eyes as I push past him taking the place in front of the radar system. 

"So I heard you and Bonny are close. Anything to add?" He smirks at me as he leans against the side wall with his arms across his chest. 

"She's a nice lass," I say passively trying not to discuss this topic. Anne knows about me. She's been kind enough to help me keep my tracks covered and it seems others are taking notice of our closeness.

He rolls his eyes and walk closer to stand beside me. "The others think it's something more. Admit it James you have a crush on the redhead."

"I will admit that you're poking your nose in places it don't belong." I continue scanning the water below checking for debris or rogue submarines. 

"Don't worry I won't meddle in your love life. You're a lucky man." He takes the place beside me continuing his assigned job. "Isn't she still with Rackham?"

"Aye, she is."

"What ever happened to him?"

"He got caught sneaking liquor aboard and won himself a dishonorable discharge," I say slyly. I never liked the man and Anne could find so much better.

He laughs under his breath shaking his head. "When we get back on land first thing we're doing is getting something to drink and finding some women."

Finding a woman is the last thing I want to do but these guys are the only friends I have. "A drink it is, just as long as I don't have to carry you home," I raise an eyebrow glancing at him briefly. "Or find you naked in my bed with some woman."

"It won't happen," he laughs. "Well at least not again."

'Beep Beep Beep' my watch sounds off declaring the shift change for dinner. 

There's a knock on the door and two men step in as me and Edward walk out. We take up the stairs joining half of the crew in the mess hall. We collect out food and move to sit with our group of bunk mates.

I sit beside Edward with Anne to my left and Vane, Hornigold, and Thatch across from us. Hornigold and Thatch outrank all of us as lieutenants. Anne, Edward and I are all Chief Petty Officers but Vane is just a Petty Officer. It's not because a lack of skill but a lack of trying.

"Kenway, Kidd, almost didn't think you'd make it," Hornigold drawls sarcastically. "I'd think you were too busy with other things."

"Is that envy I hear?" Kenway asks "because mines bigger than yours? Tell him Anne." 

Her jaw drops a bit before she scowls at him. "Like I would know. I'd rather die than lay with you." 

Everyone laughs, Edward included, even though that should have hurt his pride it must be too big to even scratch it.

"I forgot," Edward says slyly. "That it's only Kidd you'd lay with." 

Her face flushes a deep red color and I try not to look at her knowing it's only going to make it worse. 

"Don't be shy," Thatch bellows. "No one blames you."

"Sod off. The lot of ya," I warn. "Can't you keep your traps closed?"

Vane rolls his eyes. "Sorry James. We won't mess with your woman again."

Anne is on her feet before I can catch her and lands a punch squarely to his jaw. I pull her back with me, kicking the chairs away to keep her out of reach before she kills him for calling her anyone's woman but her own.

Thatch and Hornigold have Vane's hands behind his back before he can even stand. Others are looking around taking notice, some with worry and confusion on their faces and others have small sadistic smile for seeing Anne lay into him. 

"Calm down he's not worth it," I say into her ear and she calms but stays standing stiff.

"That's quite enough," a calm gruff voice say from behind us.

The entire room goes silent and we turn to face our captain, a native man who has more experience than all of us combined.

"Ah Tabai, captain, sir," Anne says quietly.

"You all know I can't condone this activity. Petty Officer Vane, do you wish to file a report," he sighs. In every talk I've ever had with him he has been one for honor and living to the full extent but he still has his duties.

Vane shoots me and Anne a glare as he wipes the blood off his busted lip. "No, sir. She has a good hook," he says cockily. "Maybe next time."

Ah Tabai nods and turns towards me and Anne. "Bonny, Kidd, join me in my quarters. I'll call you up later Vane."

He turns and exits leaving the room to slowly fill with voice once again. Most of them taking about what will happen when me and Anne get in his office.

Anne steps out of my grasp realizing I've been holding her protectively to my chest. If she wouldn't have already known about me she would have just found out by the outline of my binding.

We turn down the hall keeping our heads up as they watch us walk out, murmuring under their breaths. Thatch and Hornigold drag Vane off to the restrooms but Edward sits giving both me and Anne a sympathetic look.

We follow him down the hall and up a fight of stairs to the private side of the ship. He opens the door leading us in and closes the door behind us.

The room is small but compared the the rooms we sleep in it could be mistaken for a ballroom. A desk sits in the center carved out of wood, looking old and weathered as it always has. A small bunk is set off to the side for him to sleep but the rest of the room has the same flooring and paint that every other room in this ship does.

Me and Anne take the seats facing him behind his desk. He is silent for a moment as I assessing the situation in his head thinking of something suitable to say.

"It was my fault sir," I say confidently. "I instigated it and..."

"It's not your fault Mary," he sighs. "I've heard many complaints from the other women about his demeaning comments and I am taking care of that. Even with that said this still has to go one file."

Anne gives me a shocked look at him using my given name and I nod in a silent promise to explain later.

"All I ask is you two keep an eye on each other. I need you to just stay quiet through these last few days before me meet port." He looks up at us and despite his soft words his face is just as stern as ever.

"We can do that sir," Anne confirms. "And thank you."

He nods and motions us to leave.

"Sir," Anne says with a new found confidence. "Can I stay in James's bunk for the last two nights. Just in case."

"If you think it's best," he nods and he walk out of his office.

"Damned men!" she curses as soon as the door is shut. "I'd gut all of them if I had the chance!"

"Don't worry Anne. If anyone would want to hurt you they would have to kill me first then if they kill me, you'll kill them anyway," I laugh. 

She punches my shoulder lightly and laughs. "This means we have to sleep in the same bed or will you force one of the men into bed with you?" She pokes my side, a devious smile lighting up her face.

"For all they know I'm just a young boy and I could probably convince Kenway into giving up his bed and sharing mine." Her smile only gets bigger and I glare at her. "Don't look at me like that. It's just a bed. If be and ii slept side my side it wouldn't mean anything." 

We walk down stairs once again and down to my bunking room. On any other circumstance Anne would never be allowed to sleep here but we have captains permission.

I open the door that no one ever bothers to lock. My room houses four. Thatch, Edward, a man I've come to know as Adewale, and I.

I sleep to the left of the room with Edward in the bunk above me and Adewale across from him with Thatch under him.

Adewale is reading something in his bunk with Thatch and Edward sitting on the bed below laughing about something.

When we walk in they all glance up, silently questioning why Anne is in our room.

"Anne is staying with us for the remainder of our journey. If one of you lay one greasy finger on her I'll gut you. Ya got that?" I question with a dark look in my eyes. 

They nod and Thatch stands pulling her into a hug. "Great job out their lassie. You got him better than most men could." He lets her go plopping back down beside Edward.

Speaking of him... "Edward can Anne have your bed?" 

"Yeah," he says then smirks up at me. "If you don't mind sharing with me."

"Just as long as you don't try any shit Kenway," I say with a smile.

Anne climbs to the upper bunk with no trouble settling into Edwards bed. "If you've been jacking off in these sheets I'm going to ring your neck," she laughs but none of us take the threat too lightly. 

"Don't worry Annie dear. It's James here you have to worry about," he says slyly.

"Like hell I do!" I say as I lay down in the small cot facing the wall. Edward climbs in after me pressing his bare back against my clothed one.

It's a tight fit to say the least and my stomach in pressed flat against the wall.

Thatch laughs under his breath at the awkward predicament we're in but says no more as he flips off the light by the door without even having to stand up. 

I can't get very comfortable. His arse is pressed against mine and for a man his is quite round. What the hell am I thinking?

I force my eyes closed and slowly drift off.

I wake up early because the heat is becoming too much. I'm laying on something that is not a mattress. 

My eyes open slowly and I realize where I am. I'm laying on Edwards bare chest with my head tucked in between his neck and shoulder. He is silently drawing small circles on my back with a single finger causing chills to run up and down my spine and heat to well up in a place that it shouldn't at a moment like this. Damn it's been too long.

I push up off of him quickly almost knocking him off with me and pace to the far side of the room which isn't far. "Edward! What the hell!" I hiss quietly, not wanting to wake the others up but unable to contain my exasperation.

"I didn't do anything. I woke up with you sprawled across me," he whispers innocently.

"Then why the fuck didn't you wake me up!"

"You looked tired. It's okay Kidd I really don't mind," he pauses just looking at me before lifting the blanket up. "We still have a half an hour." 

I sigh and climb back in beside him. It's uncomfortable laying side by side and I reluctantly throw my leg over his waist and drape my arm across his chest. My head fits perfectly in the crook of his neck with his right arm folded under me placed on my waist.

This probably isn't a smart thing to do. I'm treading on thin ice and I can feel it cracking under the weight. I can't help but to look up at his gorgeous face. Gorgeous? Where the hell did that come from? 

He looks down at me and our eyes catch each others as we stare at one another not knowing what to say. I look away as the air is becoming too tense for two friends.

I close my eyes willing myself to drift in and out of sleep, catching small glimpses of things that come to mind in a sort of daydream. I see Edward and I sitting on a small beach just laying under the stars. He looks over at me and smiles, as he pulls me closer and kisses my lips. 

My eyes snap open as my watch goes off. I peal myself off of him before the others start to stir awake. 

What the hell is happening to me?


	2. Our Last Night

I manage through the morning easily, skipping breakfast as always not being able to have that much on my stomach this early. Instead I opt for doing some final training with the junior officers, taking Anne with me.

They're a promising group and have shown that they have the means to excel in the ranks. 

Anne and I divide them into groups and send them out to do odd jobs and things we've already taught them giving us time to monitor them separately but letting us walk back and forth between groups.

"You never did tell me how the captain found out," she says discreetly as we walk to check on the first group.

"He just knew," I shrug. "The first time I was in his quarters he asked me for my real name and wanted me to explain but didn't accuse me of anything and promised to keep the information to himself. He probably assumed you knew from the way I held you in the mess hall."

"Speaking of holding how was your night?" She smiles broadly, teasing me.

"What do you mean?" I ask, playing the fool. I cross my arms across my chest subconsciously. 

She rolls her eyes and turns raising an eyebrow at me. "Fine, if you don't want to share I guess I'll have to expect something worth hiding happened." 

"Yes because I spent the entire night letting him play in my trousers and you didn't hear any of it," I say sarcastically. 

A group walks past us silencing our conversation. They enter a room down the hall and when the door closes Anne burst out laughing. "I'm just messing with you. You never talk about your personal life and we're docking tomorrow. Our service is over after that."

"I know," I sigh. "You gonna go back to Rackham?" 

"Aye." She looks over and me and sees my very visible scowl. "Don't be like that. He's not a bad guy."

I give her a skeptical look. "He may not be bad to you but I don't trust him... But I can try if it means not having to lose contact with ya."

"I'm flattered," she says trying to be sarcastic but she doesn't have a bitter bone in her body. "It's been awhile since I last saw him. A little over six months. Hopefully he hasn't drank his way into too much debt." Her voice is heavy and in the end it sounds kinda defeated. 

I decide not to open my mouth knowing the last thing I want to do is hurt her.

We move through the corridor and turn into the room me and Edward worked in yesterday just to find him talking to three of our junior officers. 

"...that should be about it. Carry on." He says with a smile as he notices me and Anne enter. 

"See you've been busy stealing our work," Anne laughs.

"Couldn't let the two of you have all the fun. We only have tomorrow left." He smiles that shit eating grin of his.

Everyone is more happy about that than I am. Problem is, I don't know if I'll stick around for long. I've never settled in one place before and I really don't plan to start.

"What's with the long face?" Edward asks seemingly unworried. 

"Nothing. I was just thinking about how i'll drink ya under the table come Saturday." I smirk at him and he mimics my expression with a fire in his eyes.

He seems okay with the answer, not wanting to dig at me.

"Is that so? I can't wait to see you barely able to stay on your feet." He leans in closer getting in my face.

"The only one that's going to be deep in their cups is you mate." I match his posture until our noses almost touch.

"Woah," Anne says quietly, conscious of the others in the room. She places a hand on my shoulder and one on Edwards pushing us further apart. "The only time people get this close is when their about to kill each other or when they're about to kiss and I have no idea what is happening here."

Edward flushes bright red for mere seconds before it fades away and he looks in the opposite direction, back to the men and women we're supposed to finish training. 

"Don't worry Kenway," I find myself saying quietly before I can stop myself. "I won't kiss ya. It might ruin your ladies man reputation."

I pat him on the shoulder and turn my back exiting the room. "I have another group to check on," I call, leaving them behind me.

-

"Kidd me boy!" Thatch says as he pats me on the shoulder hard enough to almost make me stumble. "How has your day been so far?"

His beard has been getting longer by the day and now sits a few inches off his chin.

"It's been good enough. You?"

"Fine as always. Ready for those few months ashore before getting back to work." Thatch has always been one for the sea. I really don't think he'd know what to do with himself if he wasn't in the navy. It's in his blood. "I'm guessing your staying ashore for good with the other ones your age."

"Aye. I've gotta move on sometime," I say halfheartedly. 

I look down at my feet as we continue walking towards the sounds of voices gathering in the mess hall.

"If you don't want to move on yet then stay here. Renew your contract and join back up with me and Hornigold but I can tell that's not what you want either." He puts his hands in his pockets and sighs heavily. "You're still young enough to settle down and have a family, a steady job, and kids to take care of." 

We both laugh at the last part in the mutual understanding that we're not fit for parenthood.

He continues, "But the wife part I'm not joking about... or husband I don't judge but you shouldn't knock it till you try it. Marriage, I mean"

"Says the man who's never had a wife," I scoff.

"I do have a wife. This beautiful sea we sail on. The only woman I need." He pats the wall of the ship to add emphasis. 

"Thanks for the advise but I'm not ready to settle down anytime soon," I say bitterly.

"Whatever suits you Kidd." He then walks off into the crowd with everyone else

"James, where have you been?" Anne says walking to my side with a visible smile on her face and a curious note in her voice.

She leads me back into the hall away from the others.

"One of the junior officers messed up the calibrations on the sonar and I've spend the last three hours recalibrating it," I sigh. "You look like you've had a better time than I have."

She smiles like the Cheshire Cat. "You could say that." 

I raise an eyebrow, genuinely curious what has her so excited. She reaches into the pocket of her blue camouflage trousers. In her hands she holds a paper that she unfolds and turns over so I can see.

"A letter from Rackham," I state with a smile.

"Aye, it's beautiful isn't it." She turns it away, casting her eyes down at the paper. "He says 'all I can think about is my love, for I will next see you at the place where the sea meets the shore and our lives will once again intertwine.' God I've missed him."

I shift awkwardly on my heels not knowing what else to say. 

She looks back up to me with a cheerful innocence in her eyes. "You've never said; do you have anyone that's waiting on you?"

"No," I say shaking my head forcing a small broken smile. 

Anne may know my gender but I've never told her why I'm James . It's better off this way. Everyone I care about I lose.

"Are you really telling me someone who looks as handsome as you doesn't have anyone?" She steps closer making the conversation seem intimate to anyone else who may walk by. "Does Mary?"

"Who's Mary?" Edwards distinct voice asks as he walks up beside us.

My heart drops and I have a brief moment of panic before I shake it off. "A friend of mine," I say unabashedly. 

"You've never talked about her before," Edward says playfully, as he paces around us. "Hiding things are ya Jim?"

"Not very well," I sigh crossing my arms over my chest.

He laughs causing a small shiver to run up my spine.

Anne looks horrified but quickly hides it giving me a sympathetic look. I just smile anyway letting her know it's okay.

"You'll have to introduce us sometime," he continues stopping beside us.

"I don't think so," I say keeping the playfully tone to match his. "She probably wouldn't like you much anyway."

"What makes you say that? What's not to love?" She stretches his arms outward presenting himself.

"The real question is what is there to love?" I scoff.

"I'm with Kidd on this one Kenway," Anne says slyly pacing closer, seeming to enjoy this conversation. "You may be a handsome man but your head is full of hot air."

We all laugh together. 

"It wouldn't be hard for you to change if you wanted to. You show promise," I say with a nod. 

"I'm quite fine with the life I'm living but thanks for the compliment Jim I alway knew you didn't hate me as much as you want me to think you do." He smirks and with a wink he turns into the mess hall with the others, me and Anne following behind. Her with a sideways smile and me with a huff at his arrogance.

-

"Just for future reference," Ade says as I enter our quarters after him. "I've noticed Edward has been changing recently."

"What do you mean?" I ask sitting on the edge of my bed. Well... Me and Edward's bed. 

"He's been changing for the better I think. I've lived with him since we met after high school four years ago. I don't believe I've seen him working for anything in years but today he was talking about what kind of house he would want." Ade laughs under his breath. "Though he did say a mansion. At least the man has goals."

I let out a breathless laugh, awkwardly pleased with him. 

"Keep an eye on him, Ade. If he applied himself he could do great things. More than this," I say motioning my arms to the room where in.

"You're not going to stick around long are you?" 

"Don't believe so." I rest my elbows on my knees, knotting my hands together.

"I wouldn't tell many of the others that. They probably wouldn't let you leave."

The door swings open letting Thatch and Anne into the room. Anne climbs straight up to her bed and flops down with a deep groan. "This is it," she sighs. "Our last night."

"It's hard to realize some of you aren't coming back after this," Thatch sighs. "You're a good group."

"You saps," I say sarcastically. "It's not time to say goodbye yet. You're docked for a month." 

"I know Kidd," Thatch says feigning irritation. "Just in case one of you doesn't stick around for long." He looks up at me with a sad smile as he sits on the edge of his bed.

"Oh, who said I wasn't staying?" I ask.

"We know you Kidd. Well we know parts of things that you've told us." Anne says quietly.

"You probably couldn't stay in one place for more than a month," challenges Thatch.

"I could too but I'm not into your petty games," I scoff. 

"Fine then. Prove us right," Anne laughs.

I glare up at her from over the edge of her bunk and she just winks.

Edward steps through the door smiling like he he knows something we don't. 

"Why are you so happy?" I ask.

"I don't know, maybe because by tomorrow evening we'll be able to do whatever we want again!" He says enthusiastically as he shuts the door behind him with a soft thud.

"Now you just sound like a teen," Ade laughs. "You're forgetting the part where we have to find jobs again to buy food."

Thatch lays back in his bed pulling up his covers. "Wake me in the morning. I probably won't get a good night sleep until the next time I'm on a ship."

Ade follows suit laying back and turning his back to us and I think a Anne passed out sometime during our conversation.

Edward flips the lights off and unbuttons the clasps of his uniform leaving him bare chested unlike everyone else in the room who prefers sleeping with clothes. He lays it in the small corner where we keep our various items.

I turn my back to him, not wanting to repeat what happened last night. I think he understands because he lays with his back to mine and I'm able to sleep easy.

-

It feels like I'm wearing a winters coat as I blink my eyes open trying to focus. 

Fuck not again.

I lay draped over his side, clinging to him. Thank god I put socks in my pants. This makes me realize where my leg is.

My inner thigh lays against his manhood, placing me so close to him.

I shift around and am caught by his arms holding me tight to him and giving me no place to go or move. One hand holds around my back and the other is over my thigh, keeping it in place.

Just don't think about it. 

I close my eyes, hoping morning will come soon and I can stop getting into these situations.


	3. A sea of alcohol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry for such a long wait. It was my birthday last weekend and I was really busy. But I did get this written in that time! I hope you enjoy!
> 
> Question time: do you want Edward and Mary to go back to College with Ade? Just comment your answer or message me. If not, is there anything you really want to happen?

It's been a full day since I made it through the last of the discharging process and parted with my friends on the promise I would see them soon.

Edward was a little sour that I backed out on our drinking bet but I had to be on my own for awhile.

I used to be used to being alone all the time but now I miss them. It's a big change from living with the same people everyday to being alone where no one knows who you are.

I miss talking to Anne and having her ask me questions. I miss Thatch and his spontaneous moments that make him seem like a father. I miss Ade and his wisdom. One person I hate to admit I miss is Edward. I find myself wanting to pick on him and the worst of it is when I sleep I miss waking up on him with his arms around me. Even if we only spend those last nights that way.

I have to see them soon.

I managed to rent a small apartment in the more crowded part of town. I haven't found a job yet but I've been looking. I might consider going back to college and finishing a degree.

I've spent my time adapting back to domestic life, transferring my inheritance into a new account, getting a checkbook, getting the last of my belongings out of storage, and buying a phone. It's gone well enough.

I pick up my phone and dial Anne's number, ready to make due on my promise.

"Who is this?" Anne's sweet voice asks.

"Hi Anne. It's James," I was not able to keep the smile off my face.

"James, where the hell have you been?" She asks accusingly, sounding concerned.

"I've had a few things to take care of but now that that's done I was wondering if you still wanted to go out for drinks?" If Anne didn't know me the way she does She'd think I was asking her out.

"I would love to and I think the others will too. The others have been asking about you and if I've heard anything. Edward said that if I got to talk to you to tell you to call him and give you his number. I'll let Thatch and Ade know but I'll leave Edward to you." I can hear her smile in her voice.

"Thanks Annie," I smile as I pace back and forth in the small living room. Only making about three paces in each direction.

She reads off his number and I write it on the palm of my hand. We say goodbye and I debate calling the number but instead I just opt for texting him.

-Hi Edward. It's James-

Within thirty seconds I get a reply.

-Kidd! What a pleasant surprise. I thought we'd never see you again after you ran off-

I don't think he's trying to come off as bitter, more sarcastic that anything else.

-I'm not running away mate. Just had things to take care of but I wanted to know if you wanted to get drinks tonight-

After hitting send I reread it and automatically want to punch myself in the face.

-Sounds like your asking me out on a date-

I scoff to myself.

-don't flatter yourself Anne is coming too and she's inviting the others-

-I'd be happy to come. I'll see you then Kidd. The bar on 23rd right?-

-that's the one-

-k see you then-

-k-

I flop down on the old couch that I've claimed as a bed for lack of furniture. A nap will do me well before tonight.

I wake up cold, half expecting arms around my waist but instead I'm alone and it's getting close to sunset.

I pull myself off the couch adjusting my loose fitting collared shirt and pushing the sleeves up past my elbows. I adjust the red bandana on my head pushing it just above my brow.

Making sure to grab my wallet, I stuff it into my back pocket and leave the apartment.

I run down two flights of stairs, exiting the building as a rush of cold air hits me. I only live a block away from the bar we're meeting at.

A bright neon sigh hangs above the door.

The Avery

It's a nice place. The front wall is a floor to ceiling tinted glass that keeps the inside hidden but everyone on the inside able to see out.

I walk through the door and take in the loudness of the bar. A U-shaped bar sits in the center. Tables sit off to one side and sofas to another.

"James!" I hear a deep voice call. I look over to a table where it came from and find Thatch, Kenway, Anne, Ade, and Rackham all sitting around the table, each with a glass in hand.

I walk past a few people, trying not to bump shoulders with a group of women. "Sorry," I say quietly and receive a wink from a girl that steps out of the way.

Anne stands up and hugs me tightly and I hug her back. Rackham makes an uncomfortable cough that we both ignore. "Welcome back Mary," She whispers and lets me go, taking her spot back in Rackham's lap.

I take the seat beside them with Thatch on my left. He pats me on the back, seeming to be already a bit drunk. "Kidd, how have you been?" I don't think I've ever seen him in anything but his navy uniform before and I'll never be used to this.

"I've been better but I've also been worse." I take the cup out of his hand and take a gulp of the liquid. Rum, just what I was expecting.

Thatch laughs, "Well that seems like a good place to be."

"Where have you been staying Kidd?" Anne asks.

"I've got an apartment a block from here. All I have is a couch but it's better than nothing," I say will a smile. "How about you?"

"I've been staying with Rackham."

"I've been bumming at Thatch's," Edward laughs, this being the first thing he's said since I got here.

"It would be fine if you paid rent," Thatch says halfheartedly as he takes his drink back.

"Thatch you would be lost without me," he turns to us still pointing at Thatch. "This man doesn't know how to use a smart phone and almost broke mine this morning." We share a laugh together and Thatch hits Edward playfully. "I do need to find a more stable place though."

"I couldn't help you with that," Ade says. "I'm going back to school."

Without thinking I find myself reaching out to Edward once again. "If you need a place so your out of Thatch's hair, you can sleep on the floor at my place."

"Thanks Kidd. I might take you up on that." He lifts his glass up and drinks the harsh amber alcohol. I can't help but to be transfixed on the way his lips form around the edge of the cup.

He stands from his chair. "Now their's a pretty lady over there who has been making eyes at me since I got here." He walks off to pretty young girl, dressed in a nice black dress.

"I'll be back. I'm gonna get something to drink." I stand and walk up to the bar that's isn't that crowded.

Edward is nice to look at but it's never going to be more than that. Not over my dead body.

I order my drink and lean against the bar in front of me.

"Um, hi," a brunette beside me says, sounding not too sure of herself. "I haven't seen you around here before."

"Just got here a few days ago. You come here often?" I brush my fingers through the stray bangs that hang over my bandana.

"You could say that." She sips on the martini in her hands. "Are you alone too?"

"No, just wait for it." She looks at me funny, waiting as I said. "They don't let me be on my own long."

"Kidd, who's this beautiful lass," Edward says as he approaches me and the brunette. He must have struck out with the other woman.

"Good question. I never asked your name."

"Dezrae but everyone calls me Dez."

"It was nice meeting you Dez. I'm James," I say with a smirk. "And this thing is Edward."

He elbows me playfully and laughs out loud.

"If you would like," Edward says after sending the bartender off for bottle of rum, "me and Jim are going to have a drinking contest. You're more than welcome to come watch."

"Sounds like fun," she says grabbing her glass.

I take my glass of rum off the counter and Edward takes the bottle in his hand. "You've got to drink that Kidd, to make it even," he says with a smirk as we sit back down at our table.

I sit across from him. Staring him down as I tip back the glass and drink it in one go. Setting it back down on the table upside down.

I smirk at him, just challenging him to try and best me.

He grabs my cup and his, uncorking the bottle and pouring each glass full. All the while he just looks at me with a shit eating grin that only he can pull off.

He pushes mine towards me and the others watch us attentively. Thatch seems utterly amused but Anne seems worried.

We each grab our glasses and drink it down, the burn present in both of our throats. I sit my cup back down and watch as he does the same.

"Feel anything yet?" Edward asks, his mouth set in that same smile.

"Not a thing. You?"

"Nope."

In truth I can feel my heart beat a little faster and I feel less steady.

He takes our cups again, filling them back to the brim and we repeat the process. I find myself looking at his rum soaked lips and the way his tongue licks the edges after each drink.

Edward leans forward resting his elbows on the table, using his hands to keep his head up.

"Anything now Kidd?" He almost has a dreamily look in his eyes.

"Don't answer that," Anne gives me a look like I shouldn't be doing this. "You too are on a one way street to alcohol poisoning." She grabs the bottle away from Edward and he makes a pushes out his lower lip like a 5 year old whose sweets were taken away.

"I give them ten minutes before they pass out," Thatch laughs sipping at his own drink.

"Are you well Kenway? You seem a little off balance." He sways a bit in his seat trying to correct himself. I hear the slur in my voice and it gets harder to hide it.

"Huh," Edward seems oblivious to the question I just asked. What did I ask him again?

"Leave it to these two to get pissed within twenty minutes of being here," Rackham scoffs.

"Leave them alone Jack," Anne chides. "They just wanted to mess with each other. Though I don't believe either will remember much."

"I'm just surprised Edward hasn't found a girl to take home." Ade laughs reminding me that he's still here.

Edward just looks at me, a smile on his face and everything goes blank.

My head aches, like a hammer has crushed through my temples. My eyes are heavy and I can't even think of opening them.

Wasn't I last at the bar?

I turn over and am met with a wave of nausea. My eyes snap open an I realize I'm back in my apartment laying in the middle of my living room. I run to the small bathroom holding a hand over my mouth before losing the contents of my stomach into the toilet.

I look over and see the blonde sleeping in my bathtub. He looks so calm when he sleeps.

Wait... Then another wave hits and I cough it up. I have to remind myself not to drink that much that fast again.

I hear Edward groan as he attempts to sit up, upon hearing me. "Jim," he states quietly, probably feeling what I am. "Where are we?"

"My apartment," I say, wiping my lips with the back of my hand. "Do you remember how we got here?"

"I remember Anne saying something about taking us home but I don't remember much." His expression furrows as he rubs his forehead.

I lean back against the wall, resting my head as it rolls to the side, leaving my neck exposed.

"Jim..." Edward says, almost laughing, "you have a hickey on your neck."

I stand up, using the wall as a brace and look into the hanging mirror. He wasn't lying. Right in the spot where my neck meets my shoulder, a dark bruise has formed.

"What the hell." How did I get a hickey if it was only me and Edward here.

He's really tickled by this.

"Kenway." I say, not being able to come up with anything else to say. He wouldn't have.

"I'll call Anne," he says passively as he pulls himself up, using the wall to stabilize himself. He's still wearing the black shirt and gray jeans he was wearing yesterday.

I follow him out of the bathroom and into the living room where our wallets and phones sit on the empty counter.

He picks his up phone and sits down on the couch, dialing the number and setting it on speaker phone. I pace back and forth taping my finger against my lip.

I knew this wasn't a good idea and now I'm going to pay for it. What if I told him?

"Edward," Anne says cheerfully. "I expected one of you to call."

"So I'm guessing you're the one who took us back to Kidd's?"

"Yeah, I found the key in his pocket. It had the number written on it. Thatch just wanted to see how long it would take you to get back but I couldn't let you go by yourselves." She laughs under her breath. "The amount of shit the two of you were talking."

I stop my pacing. "Did I say something Anne?" My heart picks up a beat.

"No, but you tried." She sounds weary.

"What are the two of you talking about?" Edward asks.

"Nothing."

He looks at me unconvinced but I just give him a look telling him not to ask.

"Now when did Jim get a hickey?" Edward asks to change the subject and get my eyes off him.

"Hickey? You have a hickey James?" She sounds confused but also on the brink of laughter.

"Wait..." Edward stops and looks up and me.

It happened after she left.

"We'll call you back Annie," I say slowly, not knowing what to call the intense feeling that fills me.

He hits the end call button and sighs. "What kind of mess have we made, eh?"

"Why?" Is all I ask him, looking down at the ground.

"I don't know James," he say darkly, standing up and turning his back to me as he walks. "I do remember something from last night." He sighs deeply. "You kissed that Dezrae girl and I lost it a bit." He sounds upset with himself.

No way. He was jealous.

"What do you mean you lost it?" I ask crossing my arms.

"I don't know," he says bitterly. "I just remember grabbing you by the wrist and pulling you away. After that Anne walked us out but I don't have the faintest idea of even getting here." He seems to swim for an explanation but he doesn't have one. Nor do I.

Does he really... No that couldn't be right.

"Can't change it now." I walk back into the bathroom set on cleaning myself up.

"If I got as far as to giving you a hickey I'm pretty sure this wasn't one sided," Edward says following me. He smile alluding to the fact this serious talk is not for him either.

"Is that so? I wonder which one of us started it?" I smirk at him before wetting my toothbrush.

"It was probably you," Edward says slyly.

"What makes you think that?" I say turning back to him.

"I don't think you'd let anyone do anything if you hadn't have started it. Even if you were drunk." He smiles leaning against the wall behind me.

I roll my eyes not wanting to continue on this topic. I brush my teeth, as he just silently paces around the apartment.

"This is a nice place," he says. "I wanna thank you for inviting me to stay. If I didn't know any better I'd say you missed me."

"Don't make me regret it," I say smiling and walking to the empty room that I keep my clothes in.

It feels good not to be alone.


	4. Tripping and Falling

The previous night

"These two are the only entertainment we need for tonight." Ade laughs, steadily drinking out of his glass.

Everything feels foggy, like a blur but if I try hard enough I can focus on one thing at a time.

How the girl named Dez ended up in my lap is unknown to me but somehow she did.

Her fingers run through my bangs and play with the short locks. My head rests against her shoulder allowing me to use her breasts as a sort of pillow as I clutch around her waist.

"They're so ditsy when their drunk," Anne laughs.

"We're... We're not..." Edward tries to speak but it just comes out in short slurs.

I laugh thinking it must be the funniest thing.

I just noticed the girl from before leaning on his shoulder as they kiss sloppily. Good for him.

"I feel bad for the ones who take them home but it looks like their both well on his way to finding one," Thatch laughs, putting his feet up on the table.

What are they talking about? Oh, they think I'll take this girl home. I'm much to tired for that.

"James, come with me," she says standing up taking my hand in hers. I follow her numbly, missing the feeling of resting my head.

I stand of shaky legs but am able to keep it together as she leads me to an empty couch. She sits down beside me and turns taking my face into her hands and pressing her lips to mine.

At this point it doesn't matter whose lips they are. I kiss her back enjoying the most sexual thing I've done in awhile other than laying with Edward, which would always lead to nothing.

Does that disappoint me?

Then the thought is gone and I let my hands travel across her back.

I hear someone clear their throat and the Dez pulls off me to see who it is.

Kenway seems rightly pissed about something but before I can ask he pulls me to my feet and drags me away.

Where did his lass go?

"Don't do that again," Edward says, almost in a whine as if he's a displeased child.

"Why not? I can kiss whoever I want and you shouldn't have a problem with that," I say jerking my wrist out of his grip and stopping in place. Mostly because the world is spinning faster than I can handle.

"Well I do," he pouts.

"Okay the two of you. Time to go home," Anne says as she walks up and takes one of my hands and one of Edwards.

She leads us through groups of people like we're her children and I don't blame her. We're acting like children.

She opens the door and pulls us out into the cold night air.

"Damn it's cold," I breathe leaning on Anne's shoulder.

"Colder than a witch's tit," Edward laughs and so do I. Whether Anne thinks the remark is funny or just how easily amused we are she laughs along.

We must look like an odd group. A tipsy redhead holding hands with a two young men as they stumble down the sidewalk. We're all a little too drunk to care.

"Where's your Rackham, Annie?" I ask.

"He's waiting for me to come back and we'll take a cab home."

"No Annie," Edward protests, "a pretty girl like you can't walk back on your own."

"Don't doubt me Edward. I can handle my own, you know that. Right Kidd?"

"Right," I say but it's almost just a jumble of sounds and not words.

"See. Even the other drunk agrees with me."

She opens the door to my building and ushers us in through the main entry to the elevators. We step inside and Edward ends up laying in the middle of the floor.

The door opens to my floor or what I'm assuming is my floor.

"Edward time to get up," Anne says sleepily.

"I'm too tired to stand," he replies keeping his place on the floor.

She sighs. "What is it gonna take?"

He doesn't respond. Just stares blankly at the ceiling.

"I'll tell you a secret if you do." I smile at him. Not even understanding what I'm doing.

His eyes widen a bit and he sits up. "Really?"

"Yes."

I turn and walk as calmly down the hall as I can in my state. Anne follows quickly behind.

She leans close to my ear to whisper. "Don't tell him Mary. Not when you're drunk."

The sound of my given name makes me sober up a bit. What am I thinking?

I take the keys out of my pocket and fumble them around, unable to focus enough to hold them without shaking.

Anne just laughs at me, taking them from my hands and unlocking the door. Edward walks up behind us entering the space after me.

Anne ushers us over to the couch and sits us down on opposite ends. It makes me think of middle school summer camp where the boys can't sit too close to the girls. Though I'm not much of a girl.

"I have to get back," she says after a yawn. "Both of you, go to sleep."

"Yes mum," I say placing a kiss on her cheek. "Anything you say."

I smile innocently one last time before she rolls her eyes and shuts the door behind her.

Edward sits down on the couch, leaning heavily on the arm rest. "I do believe you owe me something," he says with a smile on his face.

I stand up slowly and pace about the room, enjoying how impatient he seems to be when he's drunk.

"Do I? I could have just been lying."

"You have plenty of secrets, Jim. Telling me one won't kill you." He looks up at me with eyes like a beaten puppy. "You can trust me."

"Fine," I say with a smirk. "I'll tell you one. Then you'll never hear another."

I walk closer to him not thinking about the repercussions of what I'm about to do.

I stand directly in front of him and lean down to his level until we're face to face. I rest my hand on the back rest over his shoulder leaning closer until I can feel his short breaths.

"I like your stupid face."

I move my other hand to the side of his face and press my lips against his lightly, making what I just said clearer to him. I pull back on the full intention to stand but he raps and arm around my waist and pulls me into his lap with one of my knees on each side of him.

"Your stupid face is pretty nice too," he says before pulling me back in to kiss him again. His lips part and I let his tongue tangle with mine. My fingers comb through his hair and pull out the small ribbon that keeps his long hair in place.

It falls around his face as I play with the small locks between my fingers. His lips are persistent and I match his movements with vigor. I haven't kissed like this in a long time.

I pull his lower lip between my teeth and bite down just enough to leave a mark.

His mouth leaves mine and his lips leave small kisses along my jaw. They move down, slowly kissing down my throat.

He stops at the place where my neck meets my shoulder and sucks on the soft skin there. The feeling is more intoxicating than the drink I had.

He nips at it causing a jolt of pain but then he soothes it with his tongue.

I feel off balance and I grab the material of his shirt to steady myself but affectively pull him off the couch and onto the floor beside me.

We just lay staring up at the ceiling, neither of us able to use words.

My emotions are conflicting. I can't really have feelings for him right? It's just Edward. The man who would pick a girl over any prior commitment. Not to mention his arrogance and well fed ego.

At the same time he's passionate and driven but I don't need those things. Do I? He's also a kind of handsome I can't brush off.

Minutes pass and I feel myself falling asleep. I hear him stand and stumble to the bathroom.

I'm really daft aren't i? To do something like this. Hopefully I won't remember this in the morning, but for now I can remember the feeling of his lips on mine.

I hear his retching and coughing from inside the bathroom and I feel a smile touch my lips. That's the Kenway I know.


	5. Awkward Situations

"How much stuff do you own?" I protest.

Edward just arrived in the van Thatch loaned to him to bring his stuff to my apartment. 

I was expecting a few boxes but instead he has enough to fill a storage locker.

"It's not that much," he says scratching the back of his neck.

I roll my eyes at him as I open the trunk and look at this colossal pile of crap he owns.

"Like hell it's not much." I look past some of the boxes and notice a bed frame. "You trucked a bed all the way here?"

"Yep," he says smiling. He grabs two boxes in his arms and turns to the door. "At least now we don't have to share the couch. We can share the bed."

I grab two trash bags full of unknown materials and shut the back to follow him inside. "What makes you think I'll share a bed with you?" I scoff.

"You remember how we woke up." Of course I remember how we woke up. I was sleeping on the couch and Edward took the floor. He must have gotten up sometime during the night because I woke up with him laying flat on top of me. 

"Yes and I'd like to avoid that, thank you," we enter the elevator and hit the button. "You get your bed in the spare room and I'll keep my couch, savvy?" 

"Fine but I only moved up to the couch because you were talking in your sleep," he says with a smug smile.

"Oh yeah? What did I say?" 

"Something to the affect of not having someone to warm your bed. You used to that sort of thing?" He elbows me jokingly, the lightheartedness something he always has. That doesn't change how my heart cracks a bit under the weight of those memories.

"I might be. But my personal affairs are no business of yours." 

He rolls his eyes but complies. 

We continue loading boxes and bags until all that's left is the last solid oak headboard. 

We each grab an end and make the awkward walk back to the door. He's forced to walk back first into it and let it hit against the side. 

It's just our luck that it's too big for the elevator. "This is so fun isn't it Kidd?" He asks sarcastically. 

"Never again, Kenway," I say lowly.

We take up the stairs with him walking backwards and resting the weight down on me. "I guess I'm staying for awhile then." 

"You should be flattered," I drawl sarcastically as he smirks down at me. We continue up six fights of stairs to get to the third floor.

We move down the hall and open the door setting it down by the couch.

Someone knocks on the open door and I turn to see the girl from next door. I smile and walk over to her as Edward drags the headboard into the spare room.

She's very pretty. A little shorter than myself and her hair a few shades lighter. She almost has a lofty way about her.

"Hi, I'm Rhona," she says offering me her hand to shake. She has a surprisingly strong grip.

"I'm James. Can I help you with something?" I ask awkwardly.

"I noticed you two were new to the neighborhood and you don't look like creeps so I wanted to come over and invite you for diner sometime. Your boyfriend too." Her smile speaks of pure innocence.

Boyfriend? 

"Oh, no we're not dating. We're just..."

"This bed is really loud. I guess we won't be..." He steps out and sees the glare I send him and the girl beside me. "Flirting with the neighbors already, I see."

"The names Rhona," she says with a smile, ignoring the comment Edward was making. I'm still going to yell at him for that.

"Edward," he says making strides over to her to take her hand.

"She wanted to invite us over for dinner sometime."

"That's very kind of you," he says after placing a kiss on her hand.

She rolls her eyes and turns to me. "He's a real charmer," and places her hand back to her side. "How does tomorrow evening sound?"

"It sounds great," Edward says.

"Great see you two then. It's the one  
to the right." She waves. "Nice meeting you two."

"You too," I add as she walks away and I close the door behind her. "Well great. Now the neighbor thinks we're fucking." 

He raises his eyebrow in confusion. "She does? Is it that obvious?" He can't help himself but to crack a smirk.

I elbow him playfully as I walk past. "Who wouldn't you jump into bed with? Wait, don't answer that question. The less I know about your sex life the better." I grab my black leather jacket out of my bag of clothing and throw it over my shoulders. "I promised Anne i'd meet her today. I'll be back later. The house is yours, don't break anything." I say with a small smile.

"Trust me Kidd." His tone almost sounds serious. 

Does he suspect something? "I do."

I open the door and walk out closing it behind me.   
-  
"Do you think he might know?" Anne asks quietly as she leans across the table from in the small coffee shop we decided to meet in.

"I don't know. I wouldn't be surprised at this point," I sigh, taking a sip of my coffee.

"Why's that? Did something happen?" She takes my hand in hers in a sort of comforting gesture. 

I laugh quietly. "No Anne nothing like that. We usually just end up laying together."

Her eyebrows shoot up in surprise. "You two lay together?" I feel heat rise to my face and duck my head to hide it from her. I don't understand why this conversation makes me so flustered. "Isn't that something lovers do." She stresses the word lovers as she smiles.

"It's innocent. Like two kids at a sleepover," I say, brushing it off. 

"Yes but you're not two kids you're grown adults who lay together every night." Her hand covers her mouth as if a revelation just hit her. "You like him don't you?"

"No! What am I twelve?" Just saying that makes me feel childish. I sigh, "It wouldn't matter either way because he thinks I'm a guy and that's not going to change."

"Oh Mary. I don't want to push you to do anything but he's your friend. I'm your friend and you trust me. You can trust him." Her concern is apparent and it makes me regret opening my mouth. 

"This should be the least of our worries," I say changing the subject. "How are you and Rackham?"

She gives me a look that shows she knows I want to stop talking about this but moves on with me. "He's been acting suspicious lately. I don't know what he's up too but he seems on edge."

"He could be planing something," I say leaning back in my chair.

"Could be. He has been taking me out more often and our sex life is great." She blushes a bit at the comment.

"Could have gone my whole life without hearing that," I laugh.

"Sounds like envy there James. How's yours?" She says with a devious grin and plays with a lock of her red hair between her fingers.

"How great do you think it is? I have a grown man living with me."

Her grin gets bigger. "Sounds like you should be having a great sex life but instead you'rep here with me not with the blonde."

I narrow my eyes at her and she laughs at me. "Are you saying that you're surprised me and Edward aren't..."

"Of course I am! I see the looks you two give each other. Clear as day."

"I just can't take anything serious." I say exasperatedly.

"There's something you're not telling me isn't there?" She says in a comforting tone.

"No need to dwell on things that happened a long time ago Annie," I say with a lighthearted smile. I've moved on but I won't make those mistakes again.

"If you change your mind I'm here for you love." 

"I know. Now back to Rackham I think you're going to like what he's planning. It's just a hunch." 

I believe I already know what it is. He wants to propose. I won't tell her that though, it ruins the surprise.   
-  
"Thanks for driving me back," I say to Anne as she pulls up to the building and parks behind Thatchs' van. 

"No problem. Hopefully we'll get together soon." 

"Yeah." I step out and wave to her as she pulls away. 

I sigh and walk inside, taking the elevator up to the third floor and walking down the hall with my boots scuffing at the floor. I place my hands in my pocket to keep myself from crossing my arms. Damned nervous habit.

I just want a nap.

I lift my arm to knock on the door because I left my keys but stop myself when I hear a female voice moan.

"Edward," she gasps and I know I'm gonna have to wait.

I walk across the hall and sit on the rough carpet, pulling out my phone to play some repetitive game until they're done.

This is just another of the many reasons I won't sleep in his bed. 

Five minutes go by and my arse hurts from the hardness of the floor. I feel like dosing off.

I hear the door open and watch Edward and the girl step out. He kisses her quickly then steps back. "Kidd should be back soon." He must notice me out of the corner of his eye and stops in place. 

The pretty blonde lass looks over at me and smiles. She stands on her tiptoes to kiss Kenway once more before turning down the hall and waving a goodbye.

"Have a nice time Edward?" I ask with a smirk, as I stand and brush past him.

"You could say that." He shuts the door behind him and leans on the casing.

"Damn it Edward the whole place smells like sex." I walk to the window and open it to let in the cool breeze. 

"What can I say?" He says slyly. "How long were you out there?"

I look down at my watch then back up at him. "About seven minutes now." 

He sighs. "I'm sorry Kidd I didn't..."

"Don't apologize mate. If you wanted the place to yourself you could have just asked," I scoff and lay down on the couch. "It's getting late. You want the shower first?"

"Yeah."


	6. Cuts and Bruises

"My mother called me today," Edward says slowly, almost calculating what he wants to say. "She wants me to go back home and work with my father."

"Is that something you want to do?" I ask. If he's going to make a decision it should be one for himself.

"No," he laughs bitterly. "Not in the slightest. It's why I joined the military. He's a farmer." 

His parents are farmers? "Really? You grew up with your parents hoping you'd be a farmer?"

"Yeah, as weird as that sounds." He pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs. "It's just... I haven't seen them in so long but if I do go back they would never let me leave."

"But Edward they're your family." I understand where he's coming from but family should always come first. If I had my mother I would have never joined the Navy.

"What do you know about family Kidd?" He snaps. "You don't talk about them and every time I ask you, you get defensive."

My attitude turns for one of anger. "Have you ever thought I don't owe you an explanation?" I feel an ache in my chest and hatred blossoming.

"What happened to them Jim? Why are you alone?" He places a hand on my shoulder to calm me down but I swat his hand away.

"Don't you dare touch me again," I growl. "You wanna know so bad? Well their all fucking dead! Happy with yourself! I didn't have a choice to leave my family like you did."

At first he seems sympathetic until I mention his family and his visage hardens and he stares me down. "I'm sorry I wanted to do something with my life!"

"Well you're sure doing a lot here!" I can't even remember what I was doing before this conversation but it doesn't matter now. I turn my back on him, grabbing my keys and storming out of the room. 

I can't stand him. 

Taking the stairs, I exit the building not wanting to speak to anyone for awhile.

He pushed me to it. I shouldn't have brought up his family. I don't grieve for mine anymore but to be insisted to tell someone else I can't take. Even if it is Edward. 

I should have grabbed a jacket. My button up provides little protection from the cold air. 

I turn down a quieter street that is empty and casted in shadows of the surrounding buildings. One man walks out of an alley and that someone brushes into me. I turn around to see what his problem is but I feel a hand on my neck and the press of a blade against my side.

"Give us everything you have and you can walk away," a second man croaks from behind me, grabbing my wallet out of my back pocket with his grimy fingers

Fuck this.

I turn quickly landing my elbow into his gut. He doubles over in pain and his friend runs like a coward. The one with the knife recovers and swings it at me. I step back out of the way leaning in to punch his jaw. He swings blindly at me and this time I don't avoid it enough. 

The blade catches my side. Adrenaline is the only thing keeping me up. I land a punch to his temple and he's knocked out instantly from the blunt force.

I press my hand over my side as I kneel down and grab the knife that is covered in my blood. I wipe it onto the material of my jeans and toss it back down to his limp form.

I walk slowly back in the direction I came. The hospital is out of the question. Good thing I have what I need at home.

I'm not that far from the building and once I enter I make sure no one else is in the entry hall.

I take the elevator and stand for those antagonizing minutes waiting for it to arrive and standing on my way up.

My shirt is stained clear through and I feel lightheaded. My entire right side aches and my hands are slicked with my own blood.

I limp down the hall and use one blood stained hand to fish out my keys and shakily open the door.

"Kidd?" Edward calls wearily. Probably didn't expect me to be back so soon.

"Yeah," I manage to grunt out. 

He steps out of the spare room and takes a look at me.

"My god Jim what happened?" He says sounding distraught.

"I got mugged," I gasp and lay down on the couch.

"You need to get to the hospital," he says a bit panicked. He shouldn't frown so. It messes with those handsome features of his. Wait, what? 

"No," I protest aloud at both my thoughts and in respond to his insistence. I turn my head toward him and notice he's trying to mask his emotions. "I have a locked box inside my bag. Get that for me."

He jogs over and digs through it. I know I'm going to have to tell him. I'll die if I don't.

He stands and walks back quickly, the large ordinate wooden box in his hands. I reach into my shirt and pull out the key on a chain. It feels like signing a contract.

He kneels down beside me on the floor and I reach over and unlock it and open it. Laying on top of everything are a small package of tampons and three of my binders. 

His eyebrows furrow but I don't comment. I reach into it and pull out a small first aid kit from underneath it all. I grab the bottle of rubbing alcohol, needle, medical string, and gauze.

I start with the buttons of my shirt until I peel it away from the wound and wipe some of the blood away. Just half of my shirt is opened and I could care less at this point what he sees.

Edward is clearly shocked but stays quiet, more occupied by the task at hand.

"You're going to have to stitch me up," I grunt but fake a smile.

We've been trained for this. It was one of the medical training we were given incase of battle.

He takes the needle and dips it into the rubbing alcohol, then ties the thread to it. "Don't forget to breath," he says breaking the silence and I can hear a bit of himself again.

I feel the kiss of cold medal against my skin and brace myself. He presses it through quickly and I hiss in pain. My vision turns into a blur and my eyelids flutter shut. He pierces through again.

"Stay with me lass. You still have questions to answer," he says reassuringly.

I force my eyes back open to look at him. His eyes are focused on my side and he continues to stitch. I clutch at his left arm to prevent bending over in pain. 

It seems like an eternity as he continues threading and with one final tug he ties it off. 

"This is also gonna hurt," he say grabbing a small piece of gauze and drenching it in the rubbing alcohol.

I look down at him with a blank face urging him on. 

He presses it against the new stitches and my side erupts in pain similar to the feeling of being burned with a hot iron. I let out a pained yelp that managed to escape my throat. 

He grabs some of the adhesive gauze and surrounds the new stitches. He then adds another piece to cover it.

"That's it," he says with a kind smile but he then looks up at me and the smile fades. "Jim you're pale." 

It's not lost on me that he uses my fake name without even asking for my real one but at this point in my life which one is real?

"Lost a lot of blood," I laugh sheepishly. "Doesn't bode well for anyone."

He stands and walks over to the cabinets that we use to hold what little food we keep. 

He returns to my side with a sleeve of crackers in hand and a glass of water. "Here," he says grabbing a cracker and holding it up to me. 

"I just wanna sleep," I sigh laying my head back against the armrest.

"If you sleep I'll take you to the hospital," he says with his eyebrow raised.

I send him an unamused glare, taking the cracker from his hand and forcing it down. "Happy?" 

"Nope." He hands me another that I eat resentfully. "So Kidd I'm guessing you're real names not James."

I sigh and look up at the abstract pattern on the white ceiling. "No, it's not. My real names Mary Read but to you and everyone else it's James." I look back over at him. "And if anyone else finds out I'll make you as much of a man as me." 

"Wouldn't doubt it," he laughs. "Drink now." I take the cup from him and drink slowly before handing it back. "I don't believe you need this anymore." 

He reaches up to the knot of my bandana and pulls it off. I reach up with my left hand and comb my fingers through it.

"I can't believe I didn't see it," he says with a smirk. "How all those times you've never taken your shirt off or taken your hair down." His eyes scan my face with a look of wonder and amusement that I would usually only think of in a child.

He stands up, not leaving me a chance to come up with a bitting comment and looks down at me. "You need to sleep on a bed or you're going to tear your stitches."

I attempt to sit up but it feels like being stabbed all over again. I lay back down and moan in pain. 

He leans down beside me and hooks one arm under my knees and the other across my back. I look him dead in the eye. "Don't you dare."

He just smirks and lifts me up so I rest against his chest. "Put. Me. Down," I say lowly. 

"When we get to my room," he says with a wry smile. 

"I'm not sleeping in the bed you fucked your girlfriend in." I try to struggle but my side aches and he notices my discomfort. 

"Don't worry I washed the sheets... and she's not my girlfriend." He lays me down slowly and makes sure not to hold me longer than necessary.

"She isnt, eh? Then what is she?" He looks unabashed until I raise my eyebrow and he rolls his eyes.

"We spent a lot of time at sea Kidd. I would think you know how that feels," he makes a point to look away innocently. "She's no more than a friend."

This is going to be embarrassing. "Hey Kenway."

"Yeah."

"Umm... Not to change subjects but I need to take my binder off," I say awkwardly, not at all wanting his help but understanding I have no choice.

"If you wanted to get naked you didn't have to be stabbed to do it," he says with that shitty smile I his.

"Haha very funny," I say sarcastically. "Hand me that blanket."

He grabs a folded blanket out of the corner and hands it to me to cover myself with.

He grabs the lower hem of my binder as I lay the blanket across me. "I'm sorry I have to do this to you," he says not sounding sorry at all.

He pulls it up as affectively as he can and I pull the blanket up enough so that when it has to slide over my shoulders I'm still covered.

I'm forced to lift my arms slowly and he manages to slide it off. The ache travels through my side but I force the gasp down as he pulls it off me.

I clutch at the blanket on my chest, feeling uncomfortable being half bare only a few feet from him.

"Time for bed now Mary dearest," he teases as he sits at the foot of the bed and places the binder on the floor.

"You're enjoying this aren't you?" I ask bitterly, already knowing the answer.

"Indeed love," he says with a sly smile.

I glare harshly at him and make an attempt to kick him. "Don't call me that. I didn't know you had such feelings for other men," I scoff.

"You'd wish," he says with a small smile. "Sleep now."

"I'm not a babe Kenway. I don't need you to wait until I fall asleep," I chide. "Though I want to say thank you."

"I'm like your knight in shinning armor," he says with a smile and pats my leg. "I guess that'd make you a princess, Kidd."

I let out a chuckle and he smiles down at me clearly proud of himself for making me laugh. "I think you have it backwards. Isn't it the knight who comes back with scars that their princess fawns over?" 

"That reminds me," he starts, "how did you get that scar over your eye?"

"I could ask you the same about the one on your cheek." I dodge the subject. I can tell how frustrated he gets when I do this but it's one of my favorite pastimes. "You better let Rhona know we won't be coming tonight."

"Right," he says standing. "Don't want her to think we've skipped out on her." He makes it to the door but stops and turns around. "I won't tell her about your situation. Don't worry."

Then he walks out and shuts the door behind him.

I haven't been in here since he took it over. The white walls are no longer plain. He's placed two posters up, one of a naked blonde woman covering herself with her arms and another with a brunette woman wearing a large mens button up that is clasped at the bottom to cover her snatch. 

At least he has nice tastes in women. I had a girlfriend once that was tall and blonde. She had a pretty face and nice... Stop it Mary. 

I shake my head, trying to throw off the thoughts of my exes and past flings. Hell, I'm half naked in my best friend's bed. I shouldn't even think about sex.

His clothes are wadded up in a pile on the floor beside his unpacked boxes and bags. How much stuff can one man own?

I adjust the blanket so it's tucked around my shoulders and has no chance of moving down. The last thing I want is to have Edward waking me up and my tits are out.

I don't have much trouble getting tired and feel myself drift off.  
-  
I wake up almost instantly and am greeted my the ache that travels up my side. 

"Fuck," I gasp and hold my side with my left hand.

I realize I can't move my right hand. Not because theirs anything wrong with it but the problem is that it's being held by the groggy looking blonde beside me. 

He blinks quickly and looks up at me anxiously. "Are you okay James?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," I say groggily.

His grip on my hand tightens. "No you're not." He reaches into his pocket and pulls out two Advil and grabs a cup of water off the floor, he must have had in anticipation of this. All this without taking his hand out of mine.

I pull my hand out of his grip. I don't want any remarks made about it and take the glass in that hand.

I lay the pills down and shimmy up so I can use the headboard and pillows as a wedge, and take the pills.

The cold water helps some of the grogginess fade and I realize Edward looks like he's tired.

"What time is it?" I rub my eyes with the back of my hands.

"It's about 8 o'clock," he says between yawns. "You've been out since yesterday."

"You look like shit." I pull the blanket closer to my chest.

"I didn't sleep very well. It's not without trying but I wanted to make sure you kept breathing." He says cheerfully in spite of the dark words and looks down at the place between us. 

"You going soft on me?" I ask playfully trying to lighten the mood. "I would hope you don't go soft on others you take to your room." I add a wink to let him know I'm joking.

"You know me Mary. I never go soft." He stands and grabs a shirt of mine that he must have brought in. "I was thinking you might want this."

He tosses it to me and walks to the door. "I'll give the lady her privacy."

"I'm far from a lady," I scoff.

"Really?" He says stopping in place. "If you're not a lady then you wouldn't mind me staying." He takes a comically large step towards me.

"Oh hell. Get out," I say with a backwards grin. 

He smiles, almost knowingly and exits, shutting the door behind him. 

I sit up just enough to slip it behind my back and lay back onto it to slip my arms through the sleeves. I button it up as I always do and call him back in.

He enters with more gauze in his hands and the rubbing alcohol. 

"Fuck you," I huff feeling the unsettling weight of the impending pain that I won't be able to avoid. 

"Sorry but we'll have to wait for that until you're in a more improved state," he says with a laugh and takes back the spot he kept me company on during the early hours.

I roll on my side exposing my back to him and giving him easier access to the wound. "Make it quick."

I listen to the slosh of the fire like liquid and grit my teeth as he moves my shirt and pulls off the gauze. "I don't see any signs of infection. You sure you don't want to see a doctor?" he asks from behind me.

"Positive. Now let's get this over with," I say defeated.

The cloth lightly pats my skin as the alcohol seeps into the well stitched area. He did well. 

He takes a new piece of adhesive gauze and places it securely over it. With one pat to my side he moves over a bit to let me roll over. 

It's a big bed by all means. That made it even worse carrying the parts up on this third day here. The reason Edward has a large bed isn't lost on me either.

"I almost forgot to tell you," he says grabbing my wrist and looking at my watch. "Anne should be here any minute."

"Why didn't you tell me," I hiss realizing what's about to happen. "She knows I'm a woman Edward. She's known for a long time and if she knows I told you I'd never hear the end of it."

"What do you mean you'll 'never hear the end of it'?" Within seconds it hits him. "She thinks we're..." He lets the sentence trail off.

I just nod and he chuckles under his breath. 

"Leave it you two to have the interesting conversations. I'll get your bandana." He smiles a sly grin as he walks back out to the living room to retrieve it. "How has Anne been anyway?" he calls.

"Good, last time I talked to her. I think Rackham will propose soon."

"Really? He's a lucky man to catch a woman like that," I hear him say as he enters back in.

"That he is. Annie's a special one." I take my bandana and hair tie from his hand and sit up a bit. "She's strong, smart, and beautiful," I say with a light smile. 

In truth I look up to Anne. She's got more guts than I to be who she is without hiding behind false presences. 

Edward opens his mouth to say something but closes it right after, changing his mind and picking something else to say. "You sound like you're smitten."

I tie my hair up and tie on the bandana. "She already has someone, Kenway. Relationships only get complicated when feelings are involved," I say bitterly not liking the thought of losing people because of such a trivial thing as love.

"What feelings exactly?" He wants me to paint him a picture but for what reason I don't know.

I roll my eyes. "When you'd put your life out there for them and you trust them with every fiber in your being." I glance down at my hands that lay on my stomach. "Then they always have a way of crushing you like a maggot you are and leaving you behind."

He furrows his eyebrows and sits back down beside me. "That's how you see it?" He says skeptically. 

"It makes you weak, Edward," I say matter of factly as I look him in the eye. I didn't mean to use his given name.

Edward shakes his head like it hurts. "Have you..."

A knock sounds on the door and Edward stops his train of thought casting me a look that says this conversation isn't over for him but it is for me. 

He steps out and I hear his footsteps move over to the door. "Where is he?" I hear Anne's panicked voice."There's blood on the door."

"Well hello to you too Annie. He's in my room," he say with his usual sarcasm.

She walks in and as soon as she sees me a look of relief washes over her. "Damn James what happened?" Her voice is soft and comforting as she sits down beside me and takes my face in her hands.

"I got mugged by a loon when I was out walking," I sigh.

She leans down and presses small kisses all over my face. "Why we're you out walking around in the first place?"

I glance over to Edward who's standing in the doorway and then back up at Anne. 

"Needed some air. Edward was trying to blow smoke up me arse again," I say smugly.

"You two act like five year olds some days and an old married couple others," Anne laughs.

I catch Edwards sly smirk he sends me, behind Anne's back.

"I'll get you something to eat," Edward says excusing himself.

"I'll help or you'll end up poisoning him," Anne says standing and following after him.

Im done sitting here. It's uncomfortable and no matter how many times Edward may have washed these sheets there's still a lingering scent of sex. 

I slide sideways, trying not to move my side much and keep a hand clutched over it for safe measure. I manage to swing my legs over the side and stand up slowly on the plush carpet. The strain of standing upwards is apparent but I'm at the point of no return and I'm done being so idle. 

I stand fully with just an ache that the pills should take care of in no time.

Walking seems to be less of a hassle than initially thought. I walk out into the main space quite pleased with myself and expecting the worst from the two out here.

"I can't leave you by yourself for five minutes before you do the one thing your not supposed to," Edward scoffs and leaves Anne to shake her head and try to hide her smile.

"Maybe if your bed didn't smell like the blonde from a few days ago I wouldn't be so eager to get up," I jest with my scarred eyebrow raised. 

"Guess I'll have to carry you again," he says bending to grab me.

Anne looks at me suspiciously at the 'again' part.

"You touch me," I growl, "then I will nuder you like a dog." I take a step away from him and he laughs but I'm serious. 

He puts his hands up in a mock surrender. "I'd think you'd know better than to threaten something so precious to a man Kidd." I can hear his voice dripping with sarcasm that matches the knowing look in his eyes.

I roll my eyes at him, deciding anything I want to say might give it away to Anne. 

"Stop staring at each other and get over here and help me," Anne says with a small smile and throws a hand towel at Edward. He moves out of the way with a small smile in my direction before walking over to her. "Get a room," she laughs.

I follow but Anne stops me from walking around the counter with a hand to my chest. I panic for a second as she realizes I'm not wearing my binder and there can only be one reason for that. Her eyes widen and she drops her hand to turn and face Edward whose back it to us.

"When did she tell you?" Anne asks with a sly smile.


	7. Change of Plans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like this chapter is lacking but what do I know? Enjoy!

"She really didn't have a choice Anne," Edward says taking a seat on the couch with a plate of grilled cheese in his lap and hands one to me. Yes at twenty four years old me and Edward still make grilled cheese.

"My medical supplies is in the box I keep my binders and tampons in," I sigh and rest heavier into the couch. "The look on his face was pretty priceless I must say."

"I imagine you had the same reaction," Edward says to Anne who sits in between us.

She glances over at me with a smile and turns back to him, shaking her head. "Not really, it kinda..."

"I think this is a story for another time," I cut in, stopping her from saying what transpired that day.

"What can it hurt?" Edward asks taking a bite out of his sandwich. "I already know you two have some kind of relationship."

Anne and I both look at each other and as our gazes meet we both bust out into laughter. "I think you have it all wrong, mate," I laugh.

"You see," she starts after calming down, "everything between me and Mary is platonic. At one point we were together but not anymore."

"It wasn't anything really. More of an arrangement we made," I say after taking a bite. "Now my birdy has left the nest for greener pastures," I add sarcastically.

She rolls her eyes playfully and she turns back to Edward expectantly, waiting for his reply to this news. "So you two are telling me, that when I was in the mess you two were getting off with each other?"

"Not usually..."

"Sometimes," Anne says cutting me off.

"We don't have to tell him everything." I cast her a look that I think she understands.

"I won't meddle into your personal lives," Edward says passively. "You don't meddle in mine even when you spend ten minutes waiting in the hall."

"What happened exactly?" Anne asks with a skeptical look. "You said something about a blonde earlier."

"After you dropped me off here a few days ago I came up to find the door was locked and a woman moaning Edwards name so loudly I'm surprised it didn't bother Rhona." I finish off my sandwich and lay the empty plate on the floor. "The best part was him finding me sitting outside and not realizing it at first."

"Hey Kidd, I have needs too," he says jokingly. "When opportunity comes knocking I answer."

"Opportunity isn't the only thing that came," I challenge. Anne bursts into helpless laughter as Edward just shrugs, seemingly innocent as he pushes a stray lock of blonde hair behind his ear.

"Is that jealousy I hear? Have something you want to admit?"

"I'd rather be abstinent for the rest of my life, mate," I say with a bitter tone. "Does this mean you're insinuating that I should be jealous?"

His smile doesn't fade even through the harsh words. "I can't be that bad. You have spend multiple nights clutched to my side." He makes a point to dodge the question.

I roll my eyes. "Yeah and all those nights I wake up with a part of you pressed against me that I don't want to get close with."

"So do I. You get especially warm through your trousers when you sleep," he says with a sly smile.

"Okay moving on," Anne laughs. "You two can talk about this when I'm not here. When it comes down to it, I know what's happening here." Her tone is so matter of fact as she stands, taking my plate.

"What?" I ask incredulously.

"You two. It's funny how neither of you realize it." I look over at Edward and he looks back at me, just as confused as I. I turn back to Anne who laughs at us. "You really don't see it?" She holds her hands out in exasperation.

"Are you gonna say what I think you're gonna say?" I ask, fearing the worst. She wants us to... Please don't Annie.

Her eyebrows furrow and she places her palm to her forehead. "You two would risk your lives for one another right?"

"I could say that," Edward nods. "Now where are you going with this?"

I know Edward's not daft. I take that back, he is daft but when it comes to this he's not entirely too stupid.

"I'm just trying to show you that you two mean a lot to each other. I'll leave it at that because I want you guys to find out for yourselves." She leans on the counter and grabs a jacket she must have thrown off when she came in. "Take it easy Mary. I best be getting home before Jack hurts himself," she jokes but the likelihood of him hurting himself a pretty high.

"Annie wait," I call but she winks, turning her back and leaving. The door closes behind her and I'm left wondering what she's trying to do.

"That was weird," Edward sighs. "That's what you meant when you said Anne wants us together." He puts on an uncomfortable smile.

"She's just worried about me," I brush off. "Besides we're just friends, right?"

He looks blankly at me before realizing I asked him a question and shakes his head. "Right, to think that we would ever..." He let's his sentence trail off letting me paint the picture for myself.

"No, never." I say with a false bravado. Would it really be that appalling to me? Thinking about it I don't think it would. I think he would find it that way though. Who wouldn't? I'm a woman pretending to be a man for reasons unknown to him. Some days I don't even want to be Mary.

I think I've stayed here too long. I feel myself getting attached and the longer I wait to leave the harder it's going to be

"Now that that's out of the way what do you wanna do?" He casts his feet up onto the back of the couch and I can't help but feel guilty for planning on leaving.

"Well I guess that now you know I'm a woman you probably have questions and I'm not going to answer those." I send him a shitty smile that makes him just smile back at me. "But I will answer any question you have just as long as it doesn't involve my family or why I dress as a man.

"Fine," he says as it seems I have peaked his interests. "The scar. The one over your eye. How'd you get it?"

I let out a bitter laugh without even thinking. "It's not that eventful," I sigh. "I used to be a pickpocket when I got into my teens and there was this man. Used to walk down that same street everyday to his expensive car and everyday he ignored everyone else on the street like he was untouchable. I got it into my fifteen year old head that he didn't deserve what he had and that what I took from him wouldn't matter. After awhile I learned he kept his wallet in his back pocket and I found my chance. I tried to take it and for the first time in my life I didn't get away cleanly. He swung his briefcase back at me and it cut clean with one of the corners. Stitched it myself. On the bright side I did make three hundred dollars that day." I still hear a bit of my young pride shine through in my words.

"I would have never thought you a pick pocket," he says quizzically. "The scar suits you though. It kinda makes you look like a badass."

"It does?" I ask knowingly. "The only thing it ever did for me was help me scare away the confused straight men." I feel to myself smile bitterly.

"Have problems with that?" He questions with a shitty smile.

"More often than not I have to tell a drunk one I'm not interested nor am I a girl." I subconsciously touch the side of my neck where the hickey used to be. I still don't understand any of that. "Didn't seem to scare you away," I mumble under my breath.

"My mother used to say I liked women that could kick my ass," he looks away, pretending to say it absentmindedly but he can't hide that guilty smile of his.

"You're such a bastard," I scoff. "I would kick your ass right now but I'm afraid of the repercussions."

She share a laugh, then sit in silence, thinking in our own heads. What now?

The answer comes as Edward's phone goes off with a loud buzzing. He pulls it out if his pocket and answers it.

"Hello?" There's a pause before he smiles brightly and responds. "Lord Nick it's been years."

"Five. Wow it's been a long time," he sighs.

He glances up at me and then down at the floor underneath his feet. "I could."

"Holy hell you're married!" His look turns to one of concern.

"I just got out of the service a week ago. Do you really think I'm married?" His tone is overly sarcastic.

"I have a girlfriend," he says without a waver in his voice. "I think she'd be happy to go with me."

"She is? They have a kid too?"

"I guess this is what happens when you disappear after high school." He scratches the back of his neck and sighs heavily like if he tries hard enough his problem would go away.

"I'll see you then. It was nice talking to you. Bye."

He ends the call and groans loudly, sinking further into the couch.

"What's wrong?" I ask wondering what all that could be about.

"That was an old friend of mine inviting me to my five year high school reunion." His voice is heavy.

"And who is this girlfriend you're taking with you? I'll have to thank her for taking you out of the apartment for a few days." I cross my arms across my chest.

He looks up at me with a nervous smile. "I was hoping you would go with me," he says awkwardly. "I can't be the only guy who is single five years after high school."

I look at him accusingly. "A lot of people aren't married five years after high school, Kenway." Why me?

He shakes his head. "You don't understand. It's a small town and half my class was married within the year after we graduated. The reunion is our opportunity to show off to everyone else. They go all out. Suits, dresses, the whole lot."

"That still doesn't mean I'm going to pretend that we're together so you can look good in front of you're old friends," I say, my voice taking a dry tone.

"Please. Just this once," he begs sitting up fully to look at me pleadingly. "You just have to stand by me and flirt a bit. According to Anne we do that anyway."

What real harm can it do?

"Fine," I say stagnantly, surprising him a bit. "But what's in it for me?"

"Wait, really?" He asks, confused. "You'll do that for me?"

"Kenway, I spend everyday with you. If anything I should get the opportunity to make fun of you in front of your old friends." A thought comes to mind and I find myself smiling. "What would be even better is if I went as James."

"I wouldn't mind but that would mean my story wouldn't match up and I don't think they would take too kindly to me dating a man." He pauses as if debating on if he wants to say what's on his mind. "I always thought you were a handsome man anyway." He sounds smug and sends me a smile as an apology for the revelation.

"Always knew you had a thing for me," I joke, hoping he doesn't mean anything by it. "I'll go with you just as long as you don't go overboard trying to pretend. I don't want you touching on me but this doesn't mean I won't be touching you," I look down at my hands and pick at the short nails so I don't laugh at the look I know is going to cross his face.

His expression contorts into one of confusion but holds distant understanding. "So you can do whatever you want but I have to keep my hands to myself?"

"Aye, that's the price for forcing me to pretend we're together so you can pretend to be a proud peacock." He rolls his eyes at me but smiles in spite of himself.

"You are so difficult, woman," he says breathlessly.

"Woman or not I've always been difficult." He laughs at the comment realizing what I mean.

He pulls out his phone and starts typing at the screen. "I guess we have flights to book."

"Where are we going again?" I ask bracing myself for the answer.

"Ohio," he says simply. "That means we'll be staying with my parents after all."

"How in the hell do you have a Welsh accent if you're from Ohio?" I protest. I realize now how little I do know about him.

"My parents moved here just before I was born. How about you?"

"Born and raised in England. Don't you find it a bit ironic that four of us all with accents ended up rooming together? Ade, Anne, you and me and you could say Thatch too but I don't know where to place his." This has crossed my mind many times and I find it pretty funny.

"I've thought about it but can't come up with any explanation other than that we just remind each other of home." The words seem to hold a deeper meaning than just in the way he says them. I do feel at home with them and I'd hope the same for him.

"I guess I'm going to go take a shower to wash some of the extra blood off. I'll be back." I stand slowly, cautious of my side. "By the end of the week my side should be mostly healed and within two the stitches should dissolve. Maybe then I'll be able to spend more than a few hours away from you."

"Doubt it," he says smugly. "You'll never get enough of me."

"If you're going you need to look the part," Anne says with a devious smile.

"You try to put me in a god damned dress and I'll make sure I never be anymore than James from then on." I cross my arms over the shirt Anne forced me to wear. It's a lose fitting light blue tank top that is layered with ruffles. It's something that looks nice on her. Me? Not so much.

I'm only wearing it because Anne thinks it'd be a little weird to come in as James and buying women's clothing. I don't think I'd be that bad but she insisted on dressing me as she tried to hide her smile. I'm just glad no one else has to see me like this.

I don't like the looks I get when I'm dressed like this.

"I promise I won't. But I will find something that will make even the most faithful married man drool." She grabs me around the waist and pulls me close to her side.

"Face it Annie. You just want to see me in it." I look down at the pretty redhead on my side.

"I also know a man who wouldn't mind seeing you in it." She looks up at me as we walk through groups of people.

"You're dead set on this aren't you?"

"You could at least try. Here this is the store." She lets me go and instead grabs my hand and pulls me inside.

I take a look around and I'm surrounded my racks filled with glittery tops and dresses as pop music blares over the loud speakers. "Anne..."

"Don't worry we'll find something. You have the intimidation down but now you need more confidence and the right outfit can help with that. I know you Mary." She stops me squeezing my hand reassuringly. "James holds all the confidence and he shouldn't because I like Mary just as much."

"Thanks," I say awkwardly. She's trending along a line I don't like to cross.

She lets go of me with a nod of approval and moves to the nearest rack to shuffle through it. I look around and begin and wander throughout the vast store. Everything is something I couldn't see myself wearing. So many fluffy dresses and dresses that are slim and form fitting. All the tops I find are made to be worn with a skirt, something I can't even think of wearing.

How do women do it? Wouldn't their be gusts of air and god forbid you try to run in the tight kind. They're like goddesses.

"What about this?" Anne asks holding up a blue shirt that is connected with a zipper that runs up the front. The front dives down to show cleavage I don't have.

I look up at her with an awkward smile. "It's nice."

"I knew you were going to hate it. I just wanted to get you used to that feeling." She smiles to hide the laugh. "Don't worry about hurting my feelings because it won't. I know this is hideous."

I glare at her and she laughs moving away to look for something else.

After five minutes of looking at things I wish I was more comfortable wearing, Anne comes back with an arm full of clothes.

"To the dressing room," she says placing her free hand on my shoulder and practically tugging on my arm.

"You're gonna kill me Annie," I sigh.

"I'm trying," she laughs.

She leads me past a sales attendant and into one of the open stalls. After laying everything that's in her arms onto the bench, she locks the door behind us.

"Off the clothes go," she whispers with a smile, aware of people walking in and out.

"I was wrong. This was an excuse to get me naked," I smirk at her as I reach for the hem of the tank top and pull it over my head.

I undo the buttons of the skinny jeans she loaned me and slide them down my legs.

"Only you wear boxer briefs." She stifles a laugh into her hand.

"You're just lucky I didn't wear my usual boxers. They wouldn't look that nice under those jeans." I pull at the material to help I stick it from my legs.

"We also need to get you a bra because not wearing one is not going to cut it in some of this stuff." I groan at the words and lean on the wall.

"All this for Kenway? I'm really second guessing my decision to go with him if that means wearing a bra."

"He'll love it," she says, her voice taking a huskier tone.

"I'm not going to fuck him so get that out of your pretty head," I say in a snide way and poke the tip of her nose.

Her hand grazes my side where the medical tape covers my stitches. "Well if he ever sticks anything other than a needle in you I want to know."

"You get off on this, don't you?" I can read the answer off her face.

"Maybe a little." I scoff at her and she continues. "I just want to see my two best friends happy and I think this is the easiest solution.

"I don't. Now we're here to buy clothes not have conversations where I'm half dressed."

"Fine but I'm not done with this. Give me one sec to run out and grab you a bra. What size do you wear?"

"Does it look like I know?" I say rhetorically in my usual snide tone.

"Probably not. Here." She reaches out and takes my breasts into her hands. This is not the first time and I doubt it will be the last. "I'd say an A and for the size of your rib cage is... say about 36."

"Did you have to touch me to figure out a have the breasts of an over weight teenaged boy?"

She makes an offended look but doesn't move her hands. "Don't say such things. Just because they're small doesn't mean they aren't perfect."

"Just go get me the god damned bra," I pout.

"You'll thank me later, love," she whispers excitedly and I turn away to hide myself as she slips out of the room.

I sit down beside the pile of clothes with a sigh and try to pull myself together. I don't hate women's clothing I'm just not comfortable in it but who is a better teacher than Anne?

I look over at the pile and smile a bit. What has she gotten me into?

Anne knocks and I unlock the door, holding a hand over my breasts, and let her inside.

"I got you one to try on but we'll go to a lingerie ship to get you something nicer." She hands me a black bra that looks like it would be made for a twelve yet old girl who just started puberty. Just my size.

"Slide it over your shoulders and I'll clasp it for you," she instructs. "I'm pretty sure you're more familiar with taking them off of others than putting them on yourself."

"You could say that," I add smugly. "To be truthful I've only been with three people my whole life. Including you."

"Surprisingly it's only been four for me. Two of them I only slept with once. You and Jack are the other two." She grabs the ends of the bra and pulls the clasp together, hooking it.

I turn to the full length mirror and look skeptically at myself. I never once thought i'd wear a bra but here I am.

"You look adorable," Anne says cheerfully.

I force a smile at her and she hands me a red tank top that has metallic studs running down the center. I slide it over my head and I must say the bra lifts everything up enough so it sits higher, leaving me visible cleavage.

"I don't mind this," I say truthfully.

"I was thinking you could wear this to meet his parents." She hands me a pair of black skinny jeans to put on.

I shimmy them up my legs, which is harder than expected because the legs are made for someone with less muscle.

"It'll do," I say, taking one last look before pulling the shirt off.

Anne has a small celebration behind me even exclaiming, "yes."

I fold the shirt and place it in a new pile. "We're getting their late Saturday night and leaving Monday morning so I just need one more outfit and something to wear to the reunion."

"Oh don't worry about that. I have something you're going to like but we'll get the last outfit first I still have four other blouses."

I try on a blue frilly thing and decline by just saying "it's hideous."

She protests, "it's not that bad and it brings out the green in your brown eyes."

"I'm good," I say shaking my head and taking it off, swapping it for a purple high necked tank top.

"I don't think so," I say with a shake of my head.

"Hold on I have something for this." She reaches over and pulls out a leather jacket. It's very different from the one I own. Mine is a mens that is not worried about a dip in the waist and is not synthetic but this isn't that bad, I kinda even like how it makes me look. "This will do Annie."

"Now for the best part," she says helping me out of everything other than the bra and my panties.

She reaches over to grab something that looks like one continuous outfit.

"It's a jump suit and before you say no you have to try it on." She practically shoves it at me.

"Anne it has no straps," I protest. "Do you really think I have enough to hold this up?" I don't want to sound dry with her but that's exactly what I do.

"Just put it on," she urges helping me undo the zipper in the back and step into it. "What you lack in the top you make up with your bottom." She pinches my backside and I jump, swatting her hand away.

I huff at her and lift it as high as it goes which is lower than I was expecting. She grabs the zipper and pulls it up until the top hugs me tightly.

The neck line is shaped like the top of a heart and follows the small lines on the top of my breast to be outlined. The bra straps are the only thing that covers my shoulders.

It feels like if I move in the wrong direction it will fall down.

Anne grabs the straps and pulls them off my shoulders to tuck them into the material under my arms.

She is practically jumping with excitement as I look into the mirror. "You look so beautiful."

The top hugs my sides tightly and accents the small dip in my waist. The legs are loose and baggy, something that I am grateful for. A red stripe runs up the left side and a white one on the left side of the black material.

"Hold on, one more thing because I can tell you're worried about having it fall down." She hands me the leather jacket I just had on and clips the top of the jumpsuit to the inside of the jacket.

"I really like it," I say a bit unsure of myself. "I just really don't think I want anyone to see me in this."

"Mary," Anne says with a sympathetic smile.

"Before you say anything do not pity me," I warn and she smiles.

"James is a part of you. I know that and so is Mary so embrace who you are and be both sides of yourself for gods sake love. You can be just as sexy no matter what gender you are." She smiles and wraps me in her arms. "Now stop pouting you don't sound like you."

"I'm not pouting. This all just feels so different," I let her go but not before she places a kiss on my cheek.

"Let me tell you though," Anne starts. "Someone is getting laid soon."

"And who would take a woman with a scar like mine." I may say it but I can think of a few.

"Namely two. Edward and if he doesn't grow up I'll have you myself." She smiles like the devil and places a kiss to my nose.

"I guess you better tell Jack you won't be home the night we get back because I'm not laying with Edward."

"That hickey you had says otherwise," she winks and looks at me with her eager eyes.

"How did you know?" I ask, panic in my voice that is masked by anger. "He told you didn't he?"

"I have my ways," she laughs.

"Okay we were drunk and I was still just James. He must of questioned something there. We all do stupid things when were drunk and you know him just as well as I that he will fuck anything with a pulse even when he's sober." I feel like I have to defend myself. I can't accept that I have feelings for him.

Is that it? Do I have feelings for him?

"I also know that Edward hasn't had feelings for a man before he met you so I would change that theory of yours."

I click my tongue and look at her in the eye. "I see you're having conversations about me."

"Just like the ones we have about him," she confirms.

"What does he say?" I feel my heart drop to my feet.

"He has something for you. I'm not sure exactly what but he talks about you every chance he gets and if I even mention your name he perks up like a pup." She smiles sheepishly. "You've got him right under your thumb."

"I don't want to hurt him," I sigh, sitting on the bench. "I do care for him but anything past friendship or platonic fucking I would like to steer away from and having him as a bed partner won't make this situation any easier."

"I understand," Anne says taking the spot beside me. "I won't push you anymore, okay?"

"Thanks Annie." I lean onto her shoulder feeling tired because of the length of this outing.

She pulls me to my feet and helps me out of the clothes and I change back into what I came in.

"We're going to get you lingerie next," Anne says with a knowing smile. "If for nothing else so I can see you in it."

"Fuck me," I groan to myself.

"Gladly love," Anne giggles and leads me out of the fitting room to the register


	8. Just Friends?

"Damn it's freezing," I curse under my breath. "What you got there?" I ask Edward as I enter the apartment after being with Anne all day. She promised to keep everything at her house until it's time for us to leave.

Edward sits on the couch with a large book in his hands as he flips idly through the pages, smiling every now and then.

He looks up and waves me over to sit beside him. I take the seat as he sits up higher to show it to me. "It's my senior yearbook," he says with a small curve of his lips. 

"I wanna see what you look like," I say taking it from his hands and into my lap. 

I flip through the pages to his picture and freeze in place. "You had short hair!" I say surprised not even believing it could be possible.

"I did," he confirms. 

He looks so different. His hair frames his face in a way that makes his features stand out in a prominent way but without it he looks less rugged and dare I say less attractive. 

I look him in the eyes and shake my head. "Don't cut it," I say bluntly. 

"Don't worry," he laughs. "I wouldn't think about it."

I look underneath his picture and am not disappointed as his quote is something very Edward like.

'You're all going to regret not dating me in high school'

"I think your quote is a lie Kenway. The only one that's regretting is me, putting up with your sorry arse." He smirks as if getting an idea that I'm not going to like. He leans over on me and presses his cheek to mine. 

"You love me don't even try to lie." His stubble scratches softly on the soft skin of my cheek and I continue leaning away until he's resting his head on my side. "Who would you pick on if it wasn't me?"

"Get off of me you old scratch!" I say trying to hide my laugh as I push him off. He still stays close enough to look at the book over my shoulder but it's not that bad.

"Who was the guy you talked to? Nick was his name?" He nods and flips the next page.

"This is him." He's not a bad looking guy. He has dark hair and a more feminine nose that brings your eyes off of his strong brow. "We played football together. I was a lineman and he was a receiver only because of how scrawny he was."

"You also said someone was pregnant. Who's that?" He lays further onto my shoulder and points out a beautiful girl with reddish-hair and a kind smile.

"Her name's Caroline," he says, his voice taking a heavier note. "We were together since middle school and when I told her I wanted to join the navy she was upset, which she had a right to be and we broke up under terms that I would be back soon but I guess we see how well that went." 

"I'm sorry to hear that." I really shouldn't have asked.

"Don't be," he sighs. "She's happy now and that's all I can ask for. I'm not husband material."

"I know the feeling." I scan the list of names and faces trying to see how many I can remember. 

"Tosh," he says seriously. "You would be a great spouse."

I laugh at him. "I'm the farthest from. Even worse with children. Besides, I'd have to marry a woman because gay marriage is still illegal. Jokes on them," I say with a bitter laugh.

He looks up at me, looking like a pup. "I never asked but what are you into? You've dated Anne and you said something about a guy once. I'm just curious." 

"What? Want to make sure you meet the requirements?" He smiles and tries for an answer but I let him off the hook. "It doesn't matter to me at all."

"I used to think I was straight. That was before i got a crush on you and realized even after you told me your name's Mary I wouldn't have cared. So thanks, for making me question my sexuality you dick." He says, staying pressed to my side in spite of his snide tone.

"You're welcome." I send him a smug smile and go back to looking through the yearbook. "Now how is all this going to work?"

"I already talked to my parents and they're fine with us staying. We'll probably meet up with a few of my old friends, go to the reunion and get back here as fast as we can. Unless you have something else in mind?" I can hear in his voice that he has something else in mind.

"Sounds fine with me. I wonder if any of them expected you to date someone like me," I sigh.

"If by that you mean a former ranking naval officer then no probably not." He smiles innocently as he pushes himself closer.

"I mean a woman who doesn't look much like one, with scars and tattoos..."

"You have tattoos?" He asks, seemingly excited.

"Of course I do," I nod.

"Show me." He sits up and turns to me his eyes scanning me even before I can move.

I roll my eyes and unzip the jacket i put on to avoid the comments about Anne's shirt. I guess I can't hide from it now.

I tug it off my shoulders, showing the black tattoo that's placed just below my collarbone. It's almost like greenery as it spans out from the center. 

I've always liked it.

"It suits you," he says with a smile that reminds me of a fascinated child.

"I have others but you probably won't ever see those." I have two others that both have a similar design but are different in ways. One on my outer thigh and the other on my rib cage and I don't expect him to see any of that soon.

"I think you underestimate my skill at getting women out of their clothes," he says trying to hide his smile. "Oh and that tank top looks nice on you."

I grimace and his smile turns into low laughter. "Shut your gob before I shut it for you," I warn. 

"I'd almost say you were a proper lady." He keeps fucking pushing it doesn't he? "Never knew you could be such a pretty woman."

I stand up abruptly. "Shut up Kenway," I say darkly. 

I sigh heavily and walk off to his room, closing the door behind me.

I slump against the door and lay back against it on the floor with my knees pulled to my chest and my arms rapped around them so I can rest my chin on my knees.

After a minute of silence he knocks on the door. "Mary, you okay?"

"Leave me alone Kenway," I sigh. "I'm fine here on my own."

"I'm sorry," he sounds like he forces it out and I can tell how much it hurts his pride. "I shouldn't have made fun of you and I'm sorry. Can you please open the door so I can talk to you?"

"We seem to be holding a decent conversation now," I scoff and only get the sound of him leaning against the door.

"I didn't mean it." I can hear the regret in his voice. "You just make me nervous. I won't pick on you for wearing women's stuff again."

I feel myself smile before I can stop it. "You're not just telling me this because it's what you think I want to hear, are you?" I make my voice sound more upset than I am at this point.

If I know anything about Edward it's that he's not a very good lier. The poor man wears his heart on his sleeve.

"No, you'd have my balls for it," he says with a bitter chuckle.

I stand carefully and turn to open the door to find him leaning on the doorframe like a 90's heart throb. "Get in you arse." I step out of the way to let him in.

He steps inside and immediately pulls me towards him, into a hug. It's awkward to say the least. I don't know how I should hold him as his arms wrap around my upper arms keeping them in place. Just as fast as he hugged me he lets me go. "I'm sorry Kidd." 

"Should be. I don't like it just as much as you don't."

He shakes his head. "It's not that I don't like it, I've just never seen you is such a feminine way. It's different and it's nice but I didn't mean to hurt you."

I laugh bitterly. "You make me sound weak. Ya just pissed me off a bit. Do it again and I'll make sure you don't get the opportunity to piss me off twice." I pat him on the head as off he was a child. "It's late, I should be going out to the couch."

I turn but he grabs my arm and stops me. "You can stay here," he confirms. "It's big enough for the two of us."

It's not hurting anything.

"Just don't try anything," I say walking out to the bathroom. "Just let me change and I'll be back."

I close the bathroom door behind me and change out of the skinny jeans and boxer briefs into a pair of my knee length boxers. I exit and enter Edwards room to find him pealing off his shirt and pants. 

I get that uncomfortable pooling of heat low in my belly that I ignore. I just have to remember how much of an arse he is and not how much of an arse he has.

I climb into bed and pull the blankets over me and lay flat as that's the only position I can be comfortable in without pulling on my stitches. I feel his weight press down beside me and he stares at the ceiling, his hair down and splayed across the pillow.

"You know it's fucking freezing, right?" Edward asks. 

"Well neither of us have jobs at the moment so unless you want to pay the heating bill it's going to be fucking freezing." I slide closer to him to take some of his body heat.

He rolls over closer to me and casts his arm over my waist to pull me to his chest and tuck his face into my neck. 

"Enjoying yourself?" I ask feigning irritation.

"Quite," he mumbles into my neck, his warm breath against it and his lips just grazing across.

His hand now rubs my side absentmindedly from the top of my rib cage to my hip bone. It once again reaches my thigh but it moves farther in then back out. Each time he gets closer to touching me and my resolve is dissolving.

"Didn't come in here so you could feel me up," I say with a knowing smirk. 

He glances up to my face and shrugs. "If you want me to stop..." He lets me go and turns his back to me.

I want to just close my eyes and fall asleep but I need this.

I turn to his back and press myself flush against him. "Don't read into this," I whisper against his ear and press an open mouth kiss to his neck, placing light nips between soothing kisses and letting my hand rap around his waist to palm at his cock through his shorts.

He rolls back over into his former place and I don't even have time to process the situation before his hand presses against me through the thin layer of fabric. I moan quietly and he presses a kiss to my neck.

His fingers push through the opening of the boxers and brush against my slickness and he slips two fingers into me quickly. I gasp and a thought dawns on me. I've never even kissed him and he's fingering me.

I take his head in my hands and pull him up to my lips. In the same instant his thumb presses hard against my clit and I cry out against his mouth. He drowns my moans in his lips and I lose myself in his taste.

He pulls back leaving me grasping at him, the pleasure overwhelming me.

"You seem stressed love. Is something wrong?" he asks with a shitty smirk. 

"Faster you bastard," I growl and clutch onto his shoulders as his hands work faster. Then he just stops. "The fuck are you doing?" I protest.

"I have a better idea." He swings his legs over the edge and walks to the end on the bed. He leans up and grabs my boxers, pulling them down my legs, unceremoniously taking the blanket with them.

He grabs my ankles and pulls me to the edge so my shins dangle off the edge before bending down towards the apex of my legs. His breath grazes across the sensitive skin and I can't take it.

"What are you waiting for? Don't know what to do?" I say mockingly, my voice ravaged with luster I prop myself up to watch him. I know he knows exactly what to do. 

He doesn't wait any longer and flicks his tongue against my slit. I thread my fingers through his hair and massage his scalp through his blonde hair that now looks dark in the dimly lit room.

He pushes out his tongue forcing as deep as it can go. A growl is torn from my throat and he brings up his fingers, inserting the two once again.

His mouth then focuses on my clit mercilessly, bringing this lips around it and scraping it lightly with his teeth. 

I moan uncontrollably, sounding almost like a cat. The lips that are pressed against me smile and even laugh, the vibrations rolling through me.

I tug lightly at his hair in retribution to help my pride as I'm helpless to the sensations his tongue causes me.

He sucks hard as he pushes in another finger. My body spasms and pleasure erupts from my core. I push his face harder into me to ride out the waves of pleasure that are on the verge of being painful.

My hands fall to my sides and he crawls up me until our lips meet again, his entire being has me trapped underneath him. I taste myself mixed in with his tongue as his fingers lace through my hair. I push him up off me quickly and roll him onto his back to pin him under me for a change.

He attempts to sit up and caress my face but I press him back down with a hand to his chest. I crawl down him until I reach his boxers and pull them off revealing the things I so enjoy to threaten to remove. 

If I'm going down on him I'm going to do this right. 

It stands at attention, resting against his muscled stomach. I press a kiss to the tip and he moans. I move to place kisses along the underside before running the flat of my tongue against him. I love the noises he makes and how his face contorts in pleasure with every way I touch him.

I take him in my hand and push him into my mouth. I suck in as I pull back and repeat the process until I feel a faint pulse under my thumb. I take a breath through my nose and take him into my throat. His hips jerk up and I press him down and pull up enough to breathe before I choke. 

"Sorry," he gasps with a remorseful look. I quirk up my eyebrow and, looking him in the eye, take him as deep as I can and move up and down quickly, making my tongue do most of the work.

"Mary, I'm... I'm going too..." It's a clear warning but I would rather take it than have to clean the sheets at this hour. Always thinking.

I keep him in my mouth until the spasms end and he's a heap of satisfaction. He grabs my hand that was placed on his stomach and pulls me up towards him. He pulls my shirt over my head and lays back down, sleepily pulling at my breasts.

"I knew you had a sharp tongue but I didn't expect it'd crossover," he laughs huskily his stubble runs over the sensitive skin of my breasts.

Just the closeness of him has me feeling that uncomfortable ache.

"This is only the tip of the iceberg," I say leaning into his soft touch and adjusting how our legs are tangled together.

"Would you like to continue?" He asks, looking like he's ready to roll back on me.

If this does escalate anymore I know what will come next. As compelling as that may be I haven't taken birth control since I met Anne and I won't risk it with just a condom. "Not now. No further until I can find a way to get on the pill." 

"Okay," he says as he places a peck on my cheek. 

My eyes roam is body freely and I trace some of the tattoos on his chest, mapping them out. 

Peaceful silence settles over us and neither of us can convince ourselves to part or sleep. "So," Edward starts. "What does this make us?"

"We're still friends. You're not with anyone now and until then their's no reason we should just twiddle our thumbs. It's an arrangement." My voice is heavy with the uncertainty behind the words coming out of my mouth. 

The pulls the blankets up from the end of the bed and rolls closer, laying his head back on my chest. "Then I'm glad we're friends." He sounds as unsure of his words as I am.

"Goodnight," I say quietly, combing my fingers through his hair. 

"Goodnight."  
-  
*knock knock* Knuckles rap against the wooden door and I drowsily sit up. The naked blonde beside me also stirs and as the thought sets into both of us the drowsiness falls away with the rush of adrenaline. We jump to our feet throwing on clothing as quickly as we can. He gets his pants on and makes for the door.

It's probably Anne and I think he assumes much the same.

"Put a shirt on or she's going to know," I say in a hushed whisper and he pulls his shirt over his head as I look for a shirt other than Anne's. 

Edward shuts the door behind him to give me extra time and goes to the door. "Hey Anne," he says his voice tired. "What time is it?"

"It's ten thirty." I hear the confusion in her voice. "I knew you two weren't early risers but come on." She laughs.

I pull a sweatshirt over my head and exit the room, shutting the door behind me because of the inexcusable smell of sex that still wafts throughout the room.

Anne looks as vibrant as ever.

"Mary there you are," she says after stepping inside and shutting the door behind her. "You forgot your phone."

"Oh thanks," I say, a weight being lifted off my chest. I guess I was so preoccupied I didn't even realize I left it.

"No problem," she says handing it to me. "You guys have any plans today?"

"We need to go grocery shopping," Edward says, disinterested. 

"You mean you," I chime in.

"You're coming with me," he argues. "I'm not going alone." 

I huff at him and Anne laughs. "If you guys have time tonight we were planning on meeting back up at the bar later."

"Sounds good," I nod accepting the invitation. 

"That reminds me," Edward adds. "We should invite Rhona. We have put her off for three days now."

"I'd love to meet her," Anne confirms. "I guess I better let you two get ready. You're a little rough around the edges." She smiles and with a goodbye trots off down the hall.

"That was close," he sighs then smiles at me after the door shuts.

"I need to brush my teeth. My mouth tastes horrible." I push past him to the bathroom and lean over the sink rinsing my mouth out. 

"Mines not bad," he grabs me around the waist from behind and presses himself flush against me. 

I stand and shrug him off distancing him from me. "If this is going to work you can touch me without my permission. Save those touches for nights only. Otherwise we cross a line."

He steps close again wrapping an arm around my waist. "What's wrong with that line?" He asks, his lips a mere inch away from mine.

I step back away causing a hurt look to spread across his face. "It implies things. Things I don't want and you shouldn't want from me either."

He nods but it looks unnatural. "Yeah I get it." He turns on the water for the shower and pulls the tab to route the water to the shower head. "Does this exclude bathing together?"

I cross my arms debating the subject and coming to a conclusion rather quickly. "I don't see why not. Just as long as it leads to something."

He smiles and I roll my eyes at him. He sits on the edge of the tub and props his head up in his hands with his elbows on his splayed knees. "I'll watch. Go ahead," he says simply. 

"Fine," I say, my voice taking a more seductive tone.

I grab the hem of my pants that were hastily thrown on and slowly pull them down until they fall to the floor and I step out of them. "It's a show you want?" 

"It's you I want," he says proudly, "and I think I'll get what I want."

"You sound so sure about that but let me tell you. I don't need you to get off. Could just do what I want by myself." I reach back to my shoulders and pull the material of the sweatshirt over my head, tossing it on the cold tile floor.

He swallows hard and I smirk in triumph. 

"I'm not so sure you'd want to," he says, voice unwavering but filled with false bravado. "I think you enjoy my touch too much for your own good." I can't deny that he's right.

"I could just prove you wrong." I hook my thumb into my boxers and tug down until the hem is just above my trimmed pubic hairs.

"I'd rather you not," his voice cracks.

"You did say you wanted to watch." I then drop them to the floor leaving me bare to his gaze. I pretend to be unabashed as I walk up to him and sit in his lap, straddling his waist. I lean down so my lips just touch his right ear. "Now you're gonna watch."

I pull off of him and walk around him to stand in the water. It pours down me and I can feel his gaze burn into me once again as he stands and leans on the wall. I love that look on him. The one where he's not even aware how sexy he is because he's too preoccupied with watching me. I'll never get over how that look makes me feel.

I run my fingers through my hair washing out the sweat from the previous day. I look back at him and he's staring at me, lust clouding in his ocean blue eyes.

I wink at him and pour shampoo into my hand to rub through my hair. I make a point to arch my back and stick my arse up higher when I rinse it out and repeat the process with the conditioner. 

He takes a step closer to reach in and touch me but a shake my head and splash out some water to stop him. He laughs but the hungry look never fades. "Still don't need you," I remind him.

I step farther away from the water and pour body soap into my hands instead of the washcloth. I let my hands roam my naked skin with my head tipped back and eyes closed. First I go over my arms and shoulders then paying special attention to my breasts just for show before moving down my muscled stomach and thighs to around my bottom.

I step back into the water to rinse off the soap and I turn my head to look him in the eye. Without breaking his gaze I insert two fingers into myself with barely a gasp.

I work fast with my hands wishing they were his but not wanting to give up my total control of the situation. I brace myself against the wall with my left hand. This almost becomes unbearable and I stop and motion for him with the same fingers that were just inside of me. 

He walks forward until he stands on the rug and I step out beside him ready to pull off his shirt. "Damn you're beautiful," he says huskily. 

"Thank you Kenway," I say cheekily as I peel the shirt over his head. "Didn't know you were so sweet on me."

He stutters to find something else to say but I stop him with a finger to his lips. I move for his pants unbuttoning them and sliding them to the ground. 

I circle around him skimming his back lightly with my fingertips, observing the tattoos I should ask him about later. 

I make my way in front of him and pull down his boxers so he stands naked as the day he was born. He looks at me intently and I walk back behind him again. 

"I've always been an ass man," I say mocking an American accent. I pinch his playfully and he jumps a bit causing me to laugh.

He quickly grabs me by the hips and lifts me to wrap my legs around his waist, holding me up with his hands under my arse. "So have I," he says with a smirk that brings fire into my intimate place. 

"Oh you cheeky ba..." His lips press against mine, silencing me. We don't ease into it. It's just desperate and sloppy, all teeth and tongue. I break the kiss to step out of his arms and pull him into the water with me. 

It's warm against our heated skin as we step into the spray. His hands trace over my sides just for the sake of touching me. I do the same to him, running my fingers over the muscles on his shoulders, arms, and sides.

"How do you want to go about this?" He asks softly, not wanting to push anything. 

"That depends." I grab his erection into my hand. "Not in me but it's your choice either way."  
-  
We pull into the parking lot of the store and turn off the car to walk inside. The automatic doors swing open along with it comes warm air that nearly takes my breath away. 

"Let's get a cart," Edward says happily. He hasn't stopped smiling since we left.

"You're pushing it around. I have a reputation to keep up," I say jokingly. 

He takes the cart and we walk down isles picking up things we need like fruits, vegetables, spices so things actually have flavor, TV dinners because neither of us can cook, and cereals. 

"What kind do you want?" I ask as we stand in front of the wall of cereals. 

He reaches up and grabs a box of fruit flavored bullshit. "These," he says simply.

"Really?" I ask disappointed. "They taste like normal flakes with food coloring on them."

"You have a better idea?" He puts them back. "and don't tell me you like the chocolate kind," he pouts.

I look down at my feet innocently.

He laughs at me. "It's so like you to be difficult."

"I wouldn't be here if I wasn't difficult." I grab one of each and throw them in. "Next time were only getting one," I chide. 

I realize I just made a promise of sorts. That I'd at least stay long enough to have to go with him again. 

"Fine." I don't even have to look back at him to know he's smiling. "Just as long as there's a next time." 

"Worried about that are you?" I ask without turning back.

"The others say you don't stay in one place for long."

I don't confirm nor deny the claim instead pulling a jar of pickles off the shelf and setting them into the cart.

"Please don't ignore me James," he says, pain clear in his voice.

"I'm not ignoring you I just don't know what I'm going to do yet. We can't do this forever. You're going to get married, have kids and I'm going to find my place." I refuse to look at him. 

"We're not done talking about this but for now we have brands of ice cream to fight over." He leads me to the frozen section again and stops in front of the freezers.

"Okay on the count of three say your favorite flavor 1... 2... 3..."

"Rocky road," we both say in unison. 

He smiles at me, holding up his hand for me to fight five and grabs two containers full. 

"That was easier than expected," he says, almost in disbelief. 

"Seems we have more in common that we thought, ice cream wise I mean." He casts an arm over my shoulder and walks that way with me.

"Kenway, I think I found something for you." I walk out of from under his arm and pull a package of diapers off the shelf. 

He glares at me as I stare smugly back. "Haha very funny," he chides and puts them back. 

"Well you are the closest thing to a child I'm ever going to have," I say with a chuckle. He smiles, not looking at me as if he doesn't want me to see what he's thinking.

"So anything else?" He asks after we walk through most of the store. 

"I don't think so." He leads us to the cash register and we meet someone we've wanted to talk to.

"Rhona," I say in greeting.

She smiles nervously and taps her name tag once. It reads the name, Alice.

I nod in understanding even if I don't. She has a fake name huh? I'll find answers later.

"Oh Alice," I say with a smile. "I didn't know you worked here."

She laughs lowly. "It's my first day and also my last. I'll explain later." 

Edward and I continue loading groceries onto the belt as our conversation progresses. "We were wondering if you wanted to get drinks with us tonight. We're meeting some old friends and since we put you off for so long it seems right."

"I'd love to," she says happily.

"Hey Alice," Edward says innocently, "where do you find these?" he say patting me on the top of the head. "I want to put this one back. I think it's broke or something because there is definitely something wrong with it." He pretends to look at me quizzically and Rhona can't hide her laugher as she stifles it into her hand. 

I elbow him hard in the gut as he cries out in pain. Rhona's laughter only escalates as she tries to continue swiping items.

"Next time I aim lower," I say, walking over to start bagging up groceries and putting them in the cart.

"You two are so adorable," Rhona sighs. "So it's the bar just down the road?" 

"Yeah," I nod and finish loading our things, handing her the debit card to swipe.

"I want to thank you again for inviting me. You've both been nicer to me than you've had to have been."

"It's nothing," Edward brushes off. "We can't help but to be nice to a pretty lady such as yourself."

She flushes red and tries to hide it. "You're just saying that. Petty compliments will make it nowhere with me." She hands me my card back. "And if you two would try to keep it quiet at night when you have girls over it'd be great."

She glances down then back up at us with laughter in her eyes. 

"I'll try," Edward says innocently. "If you ever have anyone over feel free to be loud as retribution."

I glare at him and he raises his eyebrow to mock me. "If you do he'll probably be fucking someone anyway." I say turning back to her.

"Oh I already know a lot about Edward," she drawls. "Now you two should be off," she says shooing us off as she looks around, fear hidden behind her smile.

"See you tonight," Edward calls as we walk to the door.

"Yep."


	9. Unwelcome Feelings

I lay heavily in the bed trying to sleep before we have to get up and leave for the airport.

The week has been pretty bleak. We packed and planned more than anything else. Edward talked to Nick again and also his parents, not telling me much about either.

I pull my leg over Edwards waist as he pets my head that lays on his chest. His other hand slides under my leg and brushes against me through my shorts. "Mary, I'm really fucking horny," he whispers.

I scoff at him but don't say anything.

"We haven't done anything since the shower," he says sensually. "We'll be at my parents tomorrow night and I don't know how much of an opportunity we'll have."

Oh, yes. Attempt after attempt I've brushed off and just went to sleep and I plan on doing just the same tonight. I have my reasons though. He won't regret waiting later.

But his hands feel so good against me.

"We have to be up and leaving in six hours," I say quietly. "I don't want to meet your parents having that 'just fucked' look."

He laughs under his breath. "You seem to be taking this role seriously."

"If I'm going to pretend we're together I better sell it or what's the point?"

"I think the 'just fucked' look would add to that story." He looks down at me but I just huddle closer.

"If you need it that bad you can take a dirty pair of my underwear and go out to the couch to use your hands," I scoff.

"You suck," he pouts.

"Goodnight, Kenway," I say with a shitty smile.

"Goodnight."  
-  
"Boarding flight 265 to port Columbus"

"This is it," Edward says grabbing my hand and pulling me toward the podium to scan our tickets and board.

I've been on edge since we arrived. In a place such as this, they are employed to find anything that could be hidden and lucky I wasn't pulled out for a pat-down.

Edward was though and I understand all the reasons why. He's got a few shallow scars on his face and tattoos covering his arms. He's an easy target.

The most entertaining part was him trying to flirt his way out if it with the young man placed with the job.

I remember asking him why and all he was responding with was 'it worked with you'.

We enter the cabin, sliding our bags in the overhead. Luckily we're able to pack light to avoid checking bags.

I take the seat by the window, feeling a bit sick to my stomach. I've never been on a plane before. I spent my time on a ship when I first moved here but I've never much liked the idea of flying.

Edward sits down beside me, buckling his seatbelt and turning to me with a tired look. I follow his lead and buckle down turning my back to him and looking out the window.

"You okay Jim? Looking a bit pale."

"Nothing's wrong," I defend. "Just never been on a plane before. That's all." Why does he always have to ask?

"Never?" He continues turning closer to me. He looks like he's about to say something biting but he doesn't. "It'll be fine. The worst would be if your ears pop then I'll be here to kiss it away," he jokes.

"I can take pain Kenway. I think you're forgetting what happened to me a week ago." I look over at him and laugh in spite of myself as a thought reaches me.

"Isn't it only within the last week that we could stand each other?" he asks, reading my mind.

"It would seem so."

The pilot comes over the intercom announcing safety procedures and flight information that no one seems to pay any attention to.

Then we start to move and my hand grips harder on the hand rest. A heavy hand is placed over mine, the owner pretending not to pay attention to the amount of discomfort I'm in. Thank him.

Then we take off and like that, we no longer touch the ground. The uncomfortable pressure that fills my ears when driving through mountains returns but it's not unbearable.

I cast my look out the window at the ever expanding world. "It's brilliant," I find myself whispering.

"It is," Edward confirms. "I also see something else that is brilliant."

"Oh you sap." I watch out the window. It seems to put everything in perspective. "What is it like?" I ask him, looking at him. "Your home."

"It's like a small town house. One story. My parents had a room, we had a bathroom, dining room and a tv that we set up beside the table." I hear him sigh lightly but smile. "Since I didn't have a room my father took the loft of the old barn and turned it into my room. We painted it, insulated it and all that. It's nice in actuality and it's about a quarter mile from the house. That is where we will be sleeping." He smiles that stupid smile of his again.

"It sounds charming. Now tell me about your parents. I do have to pretend they could be my future in-laws."

He laughs a bit before starting. "My mothers name is Linette. She must be a pretty good mother to put up with as much as she did, though my father did hide many things I did from her. His name is Bernard. They're farmers but they aren't like rednecks or anything just self reliant people. They work hard."

"How did such nice sounding people create you?" I punch his arm lightly to let him know I don't mean it.

"Dad always said it runs in the family. He wouldn't let me use that as an excuse though."

"He's a smart man then. I think we'll get along just fine."

"I don't know," he starts, "he's one for marriage and I know what he'll be pushing, if he likes you." He says it almost like he knows he'll like me.

I side eye him with a grimace. I swear to god if he even tries. "Your poor parents. If only they knew," I chide and poke that scruffy cheek of his.

"I think they would be pretty proud that I was able to convince you, of all people, to pretend to date me in front of them. Who's laughing now?" He pokes me just like I poked him.

"Still me. I'm planning on embarrassing the hell out of you, mate."

"I'm fine with that. It just adds more to our story of how madly in love we are, right Kiddy?" He looks right pleased with himself.

Kiddy? What in the hell? "Call me that again and I'll..."

"Now before you threaten my manhood, listen. To everyone else they think I'm calling you kitty like a cat but to you and me it's just your last name with a y. That means you can come up with one for me. Anything you want."

I take a moment to think this through. I need something equally embarrassing. "If I have to be kiddy then I'm going to call you Kenway the entire time without explanation."

"You do that anyway."

"What do you want me to do? I don't spend my time thinking of pet names for you."

"You should reconsider that," he laughs.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Does he do that? It really doesn't surprise me.

"Nothing," he says simply and lays on my shoulder.

I sigh. "Sometimes I think you take advantage of my kindness."

He looks up at me, making his eyes look like those of a puppy. "Kindness? Are we still talking about you?"

We share a laugh. "Wake me when we land."

"Okay."  
-  
I place my palm over the blondes mouth, taking my last ice cube and slipping it into his shirt.

His eyes snap open and with my freehand I pull him close to keep him from standing. He yells against it but luckily it only comes out as a muffle.

He stops struggling after, I assume, the cube either melted or fell out and looks up with anger in his eyes. "What the hell was that for?" He hisses.

"Time to get up."

He turns around to see others getting up and grabbing their things. "Why the ice cube?"

"I can't let your parents think we're too close and you seemed in too good of a mood." I pat his shoulder and stand with him, grabbing our small book bags out of the overhead.

"What can I say," he shrugs, following me into the terminal.

"I need to change. Let's get out of security and stop as soon as we can." I keep my voice down just loud enough for him to hear.

He smiles knowingly and walks with me past security and to the outside of the women's restroom. No one is around so I grab my hair tie and bandana and pull them off before walking into the bathroom, leaving Edward in the hall.

I slip into the stuff easily, fixing the soft red material and pulling up the jeans and combat boots. Jesus help me.

I fix my nappy hair in the mirror, the small beads I've always wear clink together. With my bag behind me I exit and meet Edward in the hall.

His smile is undeniable. "It seems I have the most beautiful girlfriend in the world."

"Piss off." I slug his arm lightly and he wraps his arm around my shoulder leading me down the hall, our back packs slung over our shoulders.

Then a see an older woman in her early fifties walking towards us with her arms out. She reminds me a lot of Edward. Her hair looks like it was once sandy blonde but now it's speckled with gray like every woman of her age. He has her eyes. They looks so full of life.

"Eddy, dear." Her accent is just as welsh as his.

"Hello mum," he says pulling her into his arms her head to his chest because of her short stature.

A man with darker hair and eyes just as blue walk up beside her and pat Edward on the back, with a rather large smile on his face.

I have the distant feeling to make myself scarce but that's not an option at this point.

"We've missed you," his father says thoughtfully as his mother lets him go.

"I've missed you too."

"You've gotten so old!" His mother say cheerfully. "Became everything we thought you'd be."

"Thanks mum," he says awkwardly, casting a glance towards me.

That seemed to be enough to shift the attention to me. "You must be his girlfriend. What was your name dear? He never told us." She glares at her son and he smiles apologetically.

"It's Mary. You must be Linette and Bernard." His father nods and shakes my hand. Out of habit I squeeze a little too hard and see discomfort on his face before I let go, internally cursing myself.

"We best be off. We'll have more time to talk on the way back," Bernard says. He leads us out the entrance and across the parking lot.

Edward stays mostly to my side, trying to occasionally grab my hand but I keep pulling away. He casts me a sly look, his parents walking in front of us.

Bernard pops the trunk and insists on putting my things in.

His mother takes the divers seat and his father the passenger, leaving me to create distance between Edward and I in the back.

"So," Linette starts. "Where did you two meet?"

"In the navy actually," Edward says.

"I bet you two have a sweet story of your first meeting." She is sadly mistaken.

"Not at all," I say with a small laugh. "We saw each other around and talked but weren't at all involved. It wasn't until we were assigned the same job that we spent the entire day screaming at each other before our friends had to separate us."

Bernard laughs under his breath and I notice Linette staring Edward down in the rear view mirror.

"I like your accent. Where are you from?" Bernard asks.

"London," I say simply. I really don't want to dwell on my childhood.

"It's very nice."

"Thank you."

"How was your Thanksgiving?" Linette asks.

"We didn't really celebrate," Edward shrugs. "We've been busy lately and I don't think Mary does anyway."

"We didn't start celebrating until we had Edward," Linette says to me. "It seems we did well with installing a pride in his country." She sounds a bit bitter about that. They really didn't want him to leave.

I don't know how to answer so I don't. I know their hearts are in the right place and they feel like they're loosing their son but everyone leaves at some point.

"You both must be tired. It'll take an our and a half to get back home so you might as well nap," Linette says after a few minutes.

Edward may have gotten his nap earlier but I didn't. I rest my head against the car door and pretty much pass out of exhaustion.  
-  
"Mary. Mary," I hear Edward's voice whisper and push on my shoulder lightly.

Why am I laying down?

I open my eyes to find I'm laying with my head in his lap. I glare up at him but he only smiles and helps me sit up. The bastard pulled me against him while I slept.

"We just got here," he says. "They went ahead and went inside so I could wake you up. We can go out and put our stuff in my room or we can go in the house and do that later."

"Let's just put our stuff away. I need time to adjust to this amount of liking you." I leave the car and grab my bag out of the trunk.

"That's it." He points to a barn just a little ways off the house. We carry our stuff across the yard. The outside is nicely painted that red color most barns are. It's two stories but instead of walking inside he pulls out a ladder. "Up you go," Edward says, ushering me up.

I slide open the upper door and find a dark room. "Where's the light switch?" I call down to him.

"On the right."

I flip it and the ceiling lights come on. His room is like I expected it to be.

"I'm gonna throw the bags up you catch them," he yells.

"Okay." He takes my bag in his arms and chucks it up. I steady myself and catch the end without walking out. "Next one."

He then throws his up and I pull it inside.

His bed sits in the corner. His walls painted a plain white but covered in posters of movies, video games, and half dressed women. I'm just glad he'll never see my teenaged selfs room. A desk sits off to the side papers stretched across the surface but covered with a thin layer of dusk.

"Nice place," I say to fill the silence.

"Yep." He closes the door behind us and sits on the edge of his bed. "It's been a long time."

"Do you regret leaving this place?" I lean against the wall my arms close to my chest.

"In a sad way. I wouldn't give up my years on the ship or even the training but I've always felt like I've left something behind." He doesn't smile after like he usually does.

"If it's any consolation I think you did the right thing. Isn't that the point of free will?" I can tell how much my approval means to him by just the way he looks up at me.

"If I wouldn't have went I wouldn't have met Thatch, Anne, you," he pauses to look hard at me, "Ade, Ben, and hell I'm even glad I met Charles."

"You sound upset by that."

"Not upset. I just never realized how much I appreciate you guys. Especially you. I would have still been living with Thatch if you hadn't have taken me in and I would have been forced to come here alone. I appreciate it." He nod lightly to himself.

"It's what you do for people you care about."

"I'm glad you care about me. I wish I could show you how much I care about you." He walks up to me, standing a foot away with one hand on the wall over my shoulder.

I keep my arms crossed looking unamused.

"The least I can do is give you a kiss." His hand moves to the side of my face but I stay unmoving.

"I think I'm good without one."

He rolls his eyes at my stubbornness. "It doesn't have to be anything special. Just as friends."

I reach up to his cheek as touch it lightly. He leans into my touch and moves closer. Then I flick his cheek.

He stops and glares at me. "Fine." He turns away and steps off me. I really like playing hard to get.

I grab his collar and pull him back to me. My arm around his waist to pull his hips to mine and push his back to the wall. I push my mouth against his in a really ungraceful way.

After a moment I hear him try to say something against my mouth but I ignore him. A stupid comment wouldn't help anything.

He grabs my hair and pulls my head back. "Listen," he whispers before darting in to kiss me quickly,

A car horn is going off. I step away, letting him off the wall but he pulls me in again and kisses me deeply.

We break the kiss, panting. "Let's continue this tonight," he says, a sly smile on his handsome face.

I place a hand on his chest and push him back playfully as I head to the door. Opening it I stand on the ledge outside with Edward looking over my shoulder.

"Edward!" I male voice yells from the window of a truck.

"Fuck you Nick!" He yells back.

Nick and a brunette women step out of the car and make their way over. I slide down the railing of the ladder and Edward follows suit.

They throw their arms around each other in a hug. The brunette offers her hand to me, which I take, cautious of my earlier mistake with his father.

"You must be the girlfriend," he says taking my hand. I make sure to crush him for referring to me as that.

"The names Mary," I say with a bitter smile as he cringes.

"You also have an accent?" the brunette asks. "It's very nice."

"Umm thanks."

"I'm Abigail and this is Nick."

I nod hoping for Edward to pick up in the conversation. "So you're married?" He asks.

"As of two months ago," Nick says with a smile and kisses Abigail.

"Congrats."

"Now the reason we came over," Nick starts. "A group of us are going to the lake in the park tonight like we used to. You two up for it?"

Edward hesitates and looks at me, knowing he'd rather stay here and continue where he left off. I won't let him do that. "Sounds great. We didn't have any plans."

"Everyone's showing up around eight, see you two then." They turn their backs and head off to their truck and drive off.

I head back up the ladder, Edward following and simultaneously upset with me. Entering the room, he shuts the door and pulls me back into his chest. "We didn't have to go," he whispers against my ear, his arms around my waist.

I pull away from him to keep this from escalating again. "I'd rather meet your friends than do something I can have anytime."

"You can't have me anytime," he says, offended.

"Face it. You're easy, Kenway." I brush past him and sit on the edge of his sheets.

"I am not," he protests but keeps his smug smile.

I have to prove him wrong now. "Please. I wouldn't be able to change in front of you."

"That's because you're beautiful," he shrugs. "In your own way you're perfect." He's implying a lot with just those two sentences.

He takes my hand and under his breath he utters words that make me feel nauseous with uncertainty. "I think I'm in love."

"Don't say that." I'm stunned. This is Edward Kenway, standing in the room he grew up in telling me he loves me. "I care about you Edward but if you expect my feelings to change you're sadly mistaken." I look into his blue eyes, seeing the exact thing I don't want to see in them. I'm slowly breaking his heart.

"I don't expect your feelings to change," his voice is rough. He pauses before laughing darkly to himself and sweeping his hand over his hair. "It's stupid of me to think that we have been anything other than. I just thought... Damn it." He sits down heavily beside me and hides his face in his hands. He's beating himself up for saying anything.

"I'm sorry," I say quietly and place a hand on his back.

"I feel like if I don't tell you I won't get the chance. You will always have a place with me." He looks up, his expression one of sadness. "I know you won't stay long after we get back and I want you to know you can stay. I won't ask for anymore of this. Sex, feelings, anything. It'll be gone, I just want you to stay. I need you to stay."

Don't I feel the same way? Haven't I always just wanted a place to belong and someone who needed me as much as I needed them. Do I want him to be that person?

The answer makes me feel ashamed. "I can't promise you that much."

"I need you Kidd. Where am I going to find someone else like you?" His hand on my chin forces me to look into his eyes. "I don't care if it's Mary Read or James Kidd that I have to make mine, I just need you by my side."

I breathe heavily forcing out the words that I've never thought I'd say. "The care I feel for you is beyond that of friends but to ruin everything we have over this?"

"We already have."

I raise my hand to the side of his face touching the features I've memorized in my head since the first time we kissed. "I can try," I say quietly, feeling it's only appropriate for this intimate of a moment.

I tip my head up so our lips just softly brush. We settle into the kiss. It's not rushed and fevered like before. It's soft and I can feel how much he cares in just the way he holds my hands in his, like a fragile thing that would break if he held on to hard.

His forehead stays pressed to mine. His breath soft against my face. "You know it killed me to see you hurt? You've never been helpless and all of a sudden you needed me. That's what changed. Seeing you stumbling in, bloody and in pain right after we fought.

"All I kept thinking is, what would have happened if you died? The last thing I would have of you was being told the truth but I was too stubborn to see that." His eyes flick up to mine, filled with emotions both sorrowful and romantic.

I should have ended it sooner.

"Kenway I-"

"Mary." He won't let me finish the sentence knowing it won't end well if it started with 'Kenway.' "Stay with me until you can't any longer. Then when I'm no longer what you want you can go."

"Edward I do need you but I also need time. I just learned my best friend as feelings for me beyond liking my arse and tits," I laugh. "We'll see where this takes us and I care about you but I don't know if I can care like you do."

"Okay." He smiles and pulls me down to lay beside him, his legs tangled in mine, lying face to face.

His hand plays with my hair and his other presses against my back and holds me to his chest.

"You're such a hopeless romantic," I scoff.

"It seems to have charmed you." His voice stays low and quiet like he'd be damned if anyone else knew. "You looks beautiful when you look at me like this. Confused but happy and I like you when you're happy."

"I like being happy too." I feel almost like a child saying it. He makes me happy, with his stupid jokes and the way he holds me at night but I'm scared to admit it. Relationships lead to marriage which lead to children and that's something I don't want. So I pull closer to him and enjoy this while I can.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might be taking a small break from this but it won't be long. I should have another chapter of You're Like a Fire by then. Hope you liked it and have a happy holiday season!


	10. Games with Strangers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of the stupid antics are inspired by stories I've been told by older friends and my own parents. This is one hell of a long chapter and it didn't turn out how I wanted but I have to post it sometime. I hope you enjoy and have a great valentines day!

"So... Dad... can I borrow your car?"

Linette and Bernard have been very welcoming to say the least. I eventually was able to shrug Edward off me and drag him up to the main house.

It wasn't surprising that he wouldn't let me go. He keep whining about how I'd never let him hold me again and how I should relax for once. I can only imagine what Anne would say if she saw us.

"Where are you off to?" Bernard challenges.

"To the lake to-"

"Edward I know very well what happens when you lot go to the lake. Are you sure that's what you want to do?" His voice is stern and you can hear his evident disapproval but he won't stop him from it now that he's no longer a child.

"Don't worry. We've all grown since then. I have Mary to distract me from the cheap alcohol. Among other things," he casts a side glance at me leaving me to roll my eyes.

"Oh Bernard," his mother sighs and pats his arm. "Let them go. Eddy hasn't seen his friends in awhile and I think it'd be fun." She slides the keys across the counter, to me instead of Edward. "Just as long as you don't drive," she says sweetly to Edward.

I flash him a smile before addressing his mother. "Thank you."

"Run along," Bernard says with a smile as Linette leans on his side. You can just tell how much the care for each other and how much they want that for Edward. 

"See you later," Edward says, grabbing my arm and pulling me out the door with him.

It's gotten late. The sun sits over the crest of the horizon and the moon is looming distantly to the east.

We get in the car and I start it and reach over to the gear shift but Edward surprises me. He reaches over my shoulder and clicks my seatbelt in place.

I look over at him, pure innocence locked away in his stupid smile. I try not to think about how quickly he thought of that.

"So. Which way?" I ask.

"Go left and I'll tell you when."

Something itches at the back of my head. My nerves are trying to get the best of me.

I feel vulnerable. 

"Are you okay?" Edward asks. "You look worried."

"I'm fine," I respond curtly. 

"Your pride is showing," he laughs.

On top of everything else, I have to pretend me and Kenway are together. In the years I've known him I never once thought I'd be meeting his childhood friends and pretending that we're dating in front of his parents.

I was only supposed to be James Kidd.

He places his hand on my knee, giving it a comforting squeeze. I should be able to confide in him, so why does it feel like I can't?

I feel like he sees me differently and I shouldn't. He's never done anything to make me think he thinks less of me. If I show him those things I try so hard to hide will he still think me those traits I pride myself in?

"I'm nervous, is all."

"Thought as much."he smiles kindly at me. "You don't have anything to be worried about. Half of them will be drunk and the others will be well on their way. If worst comes to worst we can just snog and make everyone so uncomfortable they leave us alone."

"Well that makes me feel a hell of a lot better," I scoff. 

"Take a right, here. Now is it me you're worried about because if it is I only have eyes for you." Great. Now I've accomplished in making him think I doubt him.

"It's not that." My voice is more defeated than I would like so I force that away quickly. "I just... don't know how to act like... you know... like I'm in a relationship in public." I force myself to choke out the words and swallow my pride.

"Well we can fix that," Edward says slyly, moving his hand further up my thigh and leaning completely out of his seat to kiss my neck. "Just relax and be natural," he adds in a purr. 

He places his lips to my neck and kisses, bites and sucks softly but never does enough to leave a mark.

"Now you're just being a distraction and I'm trying to drive." I force down a sound that threatens to escape me. 

"I'm also distracting myself," he grumbles into my neck and continues his movements but only for a moment before siting back up. "I haven't seen them in years and though I've never cared what they thought I don't want to seem like the guy who never did anything."

"I don't think joining the navy is nothing." 

He sends me a sad smile and I would like to reach over to him to stroke his cheek and tell him it'll be fine but I can't let on to how much I find myself caring. Especially not when we're in such a precarious situation.

All of this could have gone differently if it didn't feel so forced.

"I think the others will be jealous of you," he says smugly, pulling himself away from his stress and worries.

"Why's that?"

"Well you are dating me."

"You are so full of yourself," I laugh.

"Take the turn up here then just go until you see the lake."

Town houses pass by and the road becomes more managed so the steering wheel shakes less. 

It makes me think of how the waves felt underneath my feet, the wind on my face, and freedom in my heart. Now I don't know what I want or where I'm going.

I stop the car beside another and take it in. The lake stands almost still as the wind has died down. It's gotten a bit colder but no one seems to mind, just opting for light jackets as they sit on blankets and logs beside fires to keep them warm. Light laughter rings out through the quiet town and makes it feel like someone's home.

"Here," Edward says nudging me and passing a heavy jacket to me. 

I turn it over in my hands and realize why it's this specific coat he wants me to wear. It's his varsity jacket, covered in all his patches from the sported he played. 

He want them to know I'm his. 

I sigh and shrug it on. I don't want to bring him further down. His old friends are here and he should be able to enjoy it.

"You look great in my jacket, Jim." 

I don't think he knows how much I appreciate him calling me that.

It takes the edge of everything. To him I'm still me and that's what matters.

"Better than you, I'd say." I pat his arm lightly and add a joking tone to my voice before opening the door and getting out.

He walks to the trunk and pulls out a blanket. He walks beside me and leads me up to one of the smaller fires and he smiles at what I assume are familiar faces. 

"God, Eddy!" "It's so nice to see you!" A chorus of a excited greeting come to him and I stifle a laugh at how many of them call him Eddy. 

"Welcome back, Edward. Long time no see," a guy with dark hair says harshly and stands to walk away.

"Oh forget him," says Abigail, the woman from before. 

Edward sits the blanket down and pulls me down beside him. "Don't worry. He has nothing on me now."

He smiles at me and I make a note to ask later. 

Idle conversations fill time between the eight of us. I'm guessing the others are couples. How awkward must this be for Edward? How would it be if I wasn't here?

"I don't think we caught your name," a pretty blonde beside me says after giving me a light nudge. 

"It's Mary," I say simply. 

"You have an accent," a male voice says. 

"I do. Mine isn't as funny as Kenway's though." I flash him a smile and hear a few snickers.

He smiles down at me but stays relatively quiet.

"We all know each other but you don't know us," Nick says kindly. "I think we're all wondering how you got tied up with him."

I look up at Edward asking him to answer instead. "He tells it better."

He nods and clears his throat dramatically. "We had all the same friends in the navy but never talked to each other often until we were assigned to work the same job for the day. We kept running into each other, ruining each others work, and just royally pissing each other off until we snapped and..."

"Hold on," the same guy who said about my accent pipes up. "Is this like one of those stories where you ended up kissing like one of those rom coms."

"The only kiss I got was from her fist," Edward laughs. "We were separated by some close friends and we decided we both put up a good fight and kept it to ourselves. That was the first day we ever talked." He smiles nostalgically as he leans close to press a cautious kiss to my forehead.

I've noticed how cautious he's been when we're around others.

"We've been close since then," I add to help with the worried looks on their faces. I don't think they take too kindly of their friend hitting a woman but at that moment, Edward didn't even know he was hitting a woman and I'm glad he doesn't leave that out as if it was wrong of him, as if I am now someone different.

"Wow... I think I should be surprised but I'm not," Nick says with a sideways smile. "Once we went to a bar using fake IDs and he started flirting with this gorgeous blonde dressed in all leather. Long story short we got drunk and he whistled at her. She slapped him so hard he hit the floor." Nick smiles as Edward just rolls his eyes at him.

"You got drunk at a bar when we were still in high school?" Abigail asks her newly wed husband with fury in her voice.

"It was only once and we made it home fine," he say sheepishly, almost physically cowering under the wrath of his wife. "Come on Edward back me up."

"Sorry, man. I'm not getting between you two," he laughs.

I look up at Edward, the fire hitting his face in certain ways and it almost feels right. All this madness almost feels right.

"We're not done talking about this." She says harshly before turning back to everyone with a smile.

"Speaking of drinking," the guy who hasn't said much says, "I brought beer."

He reaches behind himself and opens a cooler and starts passing bottles around. Now I understand the Kenways caution. Edward and alcohol don't mix well. Unless attempting to bed your best friend is a good thing.

Edward pops the top off but I stop him with a warning glance. "Take it easy. Remember last time," I say quietly. No one is paying attention to us.

"Don't worry," he says reassuringly.

"Why don't we play a game?" The blond beside me says, excitement and a bit of devious intent.

There goes our plans of trying to keep our dignity. When it comes down to it, Edward and I are touchy drunks. We seek out contact with others just for the sake of it and it often turns to something with more serious consequences. 

When we took Rhona out for drinks, we ended up sneaking off to snog in the bathroom, making drunken stories up about chasing a pretty girl to cover ourselves. 

I don't want that here but what do you do?

"What should we play?" The partner of the quiet guy asks as she rests back into his shoulder.

"Let's do 'never have I ever' like old times but now I'm assuming their will be less we haven't done," Nick says with a content smile.

Yep, we're fucked. When it comes to the things I've done that wouldn't be considered normal, the list seems never ending.

"Okay who goes first?" The blonde asks.

Edward smiles that shitty smirk of his and I know he'll volunteer me. "Isn't it the newbie to the group that goes first?" 

"Yeah, Mary. You first," one of the guys says almost cockily. This is one of those times not having a normal childhood comes into play.

"Fine. Never have I ever... went camping."

"Ah, fuck," everyone seems to groan, or some variation of it and takes a drink. 

"Seems I'm off to a good start," I say with a smirk. 

"My turn," says the blonde. "Never have I ever... crashed a car." She sends a pointed smile at Edward and he scoffs before taking another drink.

"This is boring," the blondes partner announces. "Now for the fun ones. Never have I ever went down on a guy." He looks smug as hell.

I take a sip and realize how light beer is compared to the stuff Thatch has us hooked on. Only me and the blonde girl take a drink. 

It's easy to forget how boring some peoples sex lives can be.

"Lucky fuckers," Nick grumbles under his breath. Luckily Abigail is too busy whispering to the quite woman beside her to hear. "My turn," he speaks up. "Never have I ever... had to hide a hickey," he shrugs. 

Me and Edward are the only ones to take a drink.

"Was this reciprocated?" The quiet woman asks slyly.

"Maybe," Edward says with a smug smile, avoiding a straight response.

"Okay," the quiet guy says, siting up a little higher. "Never have I ever... had my parents ask if I was a virgin."

Everyone but me and the person who asked drinks. I won't be surprised to get many questions after tonight from Kenway.

The quieter woman clears her throat awkwardly. "Never have I ever bought condoms." Everyone but her takes a drink. "Really?"

"So are you not using them or..." Abigail elaborates, smiling like the devil.

"We use them!" she protests. "I just don't buy them."

"Your turn Kenway." I give him a small nudge.

"Alright." His smile gets wider. "Never have I ever..." He pauses to think a moment. "Accidentally flirted with a guy."

He's admitting it. All those times id catch him staring at me on the ship. How I would wake up pressed to his side and think it was my fault. The joke he make about the bed being too loud. It wasn't as joking as I thought. It wasn't by accident.

To everyone's surprise the quiet guy takes a drink. 

"When was this Tim?" Edward asks, a smile at how red he is.

"I got drunk my first year of college and ended up in a gay bar." He's blushing an unnatural color. "I didn't know. I just didn't want to stand alone so I tried to make friends and..." He shakes his head and hides it into his partners shoulder. 

"Happens to the best of us," someone laughs. 

"My turn again," I state simply after a pause in conversation. "Never have I ever done the walk of shame." A few take a drink and I can't help myself but mumble, "their was no shame on my face when I thanked his parents for the hospitality." 

Everyone does some variation of laugh of "ohhh." 

Edward hides his face in his hand and laughs. He pulls himself together long enough to say, "not my parents."

It's the damned beer. I've already drank quite a bit.

The game continues with more things like, "swallowed" or "been to a strip club" all very fun to learn but because I barely know them it's almost lost on me. Though I've never been shy.

"Let's step this up," Nick says after a few turns. "Let's play truth or dare. It'll be a bit more interesting."

"Okay," Edward says with a large smile. "Rules. Nothing's really off the table but have some self respect. So... Truth or Dare Nick?"

"Uh... Truth." 

Edward shakes his head. "You always pick truth. If you had to pick someone from this group to kiss other than your wife who would it be?"

Nick freezes in place, thinking very carefully about what he wants to say in front of Abigail. You have to respect a woman who has her husband under her thumb like she does. 

"I'm not going to bite your head off," Abigail says playfully. 

"I'd probably be Mary. Just to piss you off." Nick takes another drink.

"That'd be a mistake," he says with a dark, possessive look in his eyes. "She'd cut you if you tried."

"Oh tosh, Kenway. It's just a game. No need to worry if I'll still go home with you. I'd be more worried about Abigail." I press a light kiss to his cheek. I wouldn't have guess this kind of response.

"You have that right," Nick laughs and mirrors my gesture on his wife. "I pick you Liz," Nick says to the blonde. "Truth or dare?"

"Truth," she says cautiously.

"Is it true that you used to have a crush on Edward in highschool?"

"I did," she says firmly. She starts to panic at the questioning gazes "I don't know many who didn't!" She defends, "but he was with Caroline and-"

"Lets not bring that up, please," Edward says. He looks regretful but not remorseful. "But I am flattered I had so many admirers." His charm is back within seconds.

"Yes but as soon as you'd open that smart mouth nobody could stand you, you shit head," Liz laughs.

I nod in silent agreement but find comfort in leaning closer to him. He is mine after all. Not the other way around.

"Angel. Truth or Dare?" Liz asks the quiet girl. 

"Dare." Her voice wavers. 

"Umm... Why don't you kiss the person with the most money in their pockets."

"Wallets out," Abigail jokes.

"Anyone over ten?" Edward asks.

"I've got twenty," Tim says with a small smile, relieved he has the most to receive the kiss from his own lover.

"Not so fast," Abigail says worried. "I have a fifty."

A chorus of 'oh's run through the party again and Angel takes a moment to collect herself, before leaning over Tim and kissing Abigail lightly.

A few jeers arise and we're back to the game.

It continues numbly for me until my name is called by the only man whose name I don't know. "Truth or dare?"

I glance up at Edward. "You should pick truth." His reasoning I don't know why.

Some of the others shoot him glares. "Truth, then." 

"How serious are you and Edward? And you have to elaborate."

I look over at Edward, not being prepared for that at all. I should play it up. 

Every time someone talks to me it's about Edward. I think they're worried for him and don't want me to be another person who breaks him. 

He looks happy. I think he wants to know the answer, even if it's not a real one. Just to hear the words.

All eyes are on us. "I... would say... we don't have plans of splitting soon. We've never discussed it at any length."

I look up at him again, ready to ask for him to help me out. Of course he doesn't. He makes it worse. "She's the love of my life but she fails to see it." He has a smug smile on his face 

"I don't fail to see it I just-"

"Keep too many secrets from those I care about," he finishes with a knowing look.

"Fine," I say harshly. "Truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"Why do ya stay with me like you do? If I'm such trouble." I feel exasperated. I've told him so many times why I care for him and I'd like the same.

His gaze softens and he reaches out to touch my face but I move away as if his hand would burn me. He, instead, settles it on my shoulder. "I'll tell you later. Now I don't think is the time."

He straightens after sending me a reassuring glance. "Now... truth or dare, Tim?"

My mind wanders off. Away from the game and to how much I miss the others. Thatch and Hornigold are leaving four days after we get back I don't like to admit how much that upsets me. I'll miss them. 

But I really miss Anne. She's my emotional support. What keeps me grounded. No matter how much it bothers me, I miss her asking about how I'm doing or if anything has happened between me and Edward. I may have always been the level headed one but she keeps things exciting. Not that Edward doesn't excite me.

That is not what I wanted to think. 

I've taken notice to how Liz and Tim have passed out and how Nick is drunkenly babbling in Abigail's ear. At some point the game stopped and turned to drunken conversations and I think someone ended up in the lake. When I drank three bottles, I don't know.

"Mary," he says my name softly in my ear. "Come with me."

He stands and I take his outstretched hand to help me up. He pulls me behind him, away from our fire and around a few others, waving when waved to.

We approach a large tree. It's branches thick and spread out, just low enough I could pull myself up into it if I so pleased.

Edward pulls a small pocket knife out of his pocket and hands it to me. "Carve your name." He makes it sound like nothing.

"What? So you can write yours underneath and put a heart about them?" I mock, but he seems unaffected.

"No. I just want our names to be together where they can't be moved. So we'll be together even when you leave." He sounds like a sad grumbling drunk but that doesn't stop the twisting feeling in my gut.

I don't protest further or try to relieve him of his worries. Instead I place the tip of the knife to the tree and start carving.

I hand it back to him and he writes his own underneath. The knife is tucked safely back in his pocket and he takes my hand in his, just staring at the tree.

I squeeze his, reassuringly. "So why is it? What I asked earlier." My voice is barely a whisper but sounds loud in the quiet night.

"It's because of reasons you already know. You're brave, intelligent, and beautiful no matter if you're James or Mary and you believe in me." He shakes his head and smiles to himself. "You have turned me into a pile of mush."

Silence hangs back over us as we both think in our own heads before I get the courage to make a promise I probably shouldn't.

"I know you're worried about me leaving and I want ya to know... I'll always come back. It'll never be forever." He rubs his thumb across the back of my hand. "I'm also becoming a pile of mush because of you."

"Are you ready to go to bed?" He asks with a content smile on his face.

"Yeah," I say quietly, "just as long as it's just sleep."

"I don't know," he says slyly. "It wouldn't be too bad in a car." He's joking to lighten the mood that has turned dark and somber. 

We walk back to the car, opening the trunk and pulling out blankets to curl up in the back seat with.

He gets in first and lays on his back, pulling me to lay on his chest. I pull the door shut with my foot and cast the blankets over.

His arms wrap around my waist and hold me close to him. "Um, Mary." He gasps.

I look up at him questioningly. 

"You're thigh is brushing my-"

"Oh sorry." I move my leg that was in between his and straddle his waist comfortably. He's extremely warm as usual and aids in warding off the cold.

"You make a nice mattress," I say drunkenly and nuzzle my head further into his neck. 

"I'm flattered Ms. Read." He presses a kiss behind my ear but I find myself not wanting to protest. Nor do I want to leave the comfort of his arms like I should. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight." I gather my courage to say something my alcohol addled brain comes up with. "Don't be mad at me, Edward. Okay?"

I fall asleep before I hear his answer.  
-  
I wake up to the sun streaming through the windows and Edwards body beneath me. He's so calm and quiet; at peace with himself.

I prop my chin up on his chest to look at him. I can't help but to push a stray lock of lose hair out of his face and let it linger, tracing the well defined lines of her face.

He has longer eyelashes that I've noticed before. They're light, so much so that I wouldn't have noticed without being this close.

I continue my tracing. It lets me know he's here.

"Mary?" he groans, his voice heavy from sleep.

I pull my hand back like I've been caught doing something I shouldn't have. 

"You didn't have to stop," he says with a lazy smirk. 

I huff and sit up. I really can't move comfortably with both of us back here. I reach around to open the door but he pulls me back down with his arms around my waist.

His cheek presses against mine and he makes a purring noise in my ear. It sounds like a god damned cat.

I sit up and look at his smug smile. "How did you do that?"

He grins wider at my look of astonishment. "I've always been able to." Then he does it again, making the purring noise that seems to resonate through me. "I'll remember that you like it so much." He has a dangerous glint in his blue eyes and I grimace, jokingly.

The tugs me back down to his chest. "No," he says simply as I attempt to struggle but if I really wanted to get away I could.

"Why? We should be leaving soon and I'm going to starve to death." 

"Just let me hold you a little while longer. Then we'll go into the town over and get something."

"Fine," I groan into his neck, giving up. 

We're too close and too involved and it's something neither of us specifically wanted but ended up with anyway and it exhausting. 

But from experience, things like this don't last. He'll lose interest eventually and it'll be easier for the both of us. No one stays around for long.  
-  
We got food as planned and went back to the house as planned. He's been nervous the whole way back.

We step out of the car and walk inside, Edward treading lightly, not knowing what to expect or if to expect anything at all. They didn't say when we had to be back.

"Hey dad," Edward says after stepping in the door. He almost walks straight into him as he was coming out, dressed in work clothes.

"Nice to see you made it back in one piece," he jokes. He had nothing to worry about. "Can you come out and help me with something?" Or maybe not.

"Yeah," he says.

Bernard turns to me then. "Linette is in the kitchen."

Then they walk out. It can't hurt to get to know his mother better right? 

I walk through the living room and onto the linoleum floors. Linette is heating a bottle in the microwave and testing it across her arm. 

She looks up, expecting me. They planned this.

"Good morning, Mary," she says sweetly.

"You too Mrs. Kenway." It only feels right to use a more formal address. It's not like Edward and I are getting married.

"Please, call me Linette." She looks down at a bottle in her hands then back up at me. "One of our ewes passed away, leaving a little one without a way to eat. We've been bottle feeding her since."

"Poor thing," I say, feeling extremely awkward.

"Hopefully, I'll get the chance to feed something other than a sheep," she looks at me with the most innocent smile.

"Oh..." I don't know what to say.

She visibly panics and shakes her head. "I'm sorry. Poor girl I've made you uncomfortable."

"No, your fine," I attempt to reassure.

"Edward is just our only son and... I've always wanted grandchildren," her eyes almost plead with me and I don't know what to say. I don't want to crush her heart but I also don't want to make a promise I won't keep.

"I understand. We just don't plan on having kids anytime soon. We don't even have stable jobs at this point." She nods in understanding.

"He's always liked kids; a little nervous about them being his own but all the same." She looks ecstatic at the prospects of grandchildren and I feel the knot in my stomach tighten.

"He'll give you beautiful grandchild one day. Don't worry Linette." She looks up, worry evident in her eyes that I didn't was we.

"Only if they're yours too," she says with a ghost of a smile. "Have you talked about marriage?"

I almost choke on my own spit. "No. We haven't been together officially for very long."

"But that's no reason to wait," she says cheerfully. "It's clear to anyone that you were made for my son."

Someone, anyone, strike me down now. "We just want to take things slow. Our friends don't even know we're together and there will be many complications when it gets to that point."

"They don't support the two of you?" she asks.

"No it's just... We've spent quite a few years now, hating each other. It'll be an abrupt change. It's taken a lot of careful tip toeing up to this point but we manage."

She makes a cooing noise and an 'aww' at my words. "You too are so sweet. No wonder my son loves you."

"He is a good person. He was brought up well."

"Yet still he's changed since he left. He's grown up a bit. More of a man now," she reminisces. 

It's Ade's voice I hear telling me the same thing.

"With time he'll do great things. I just hope I'll get to see it." The last words slip out if me on a sigh I wish I hadn't let out.

"You'd be lucky to get out of his sight. Even when Edward was just a wee lad he used to become attached to things and once he wanted something he wouldn't stop begging until he got what he wanted," she smiles, remembering a time when the man I know was still her baby boy. "Don't be surprised when he's willing to fight for you. Even fight with you if that's what it takes." She grabs my hand and squeezes it, reassuringly. 

"Thank you Linette." I smile softly to cover my uncertainty. "What was Edward like when he was little?" I find myself asking after a pause.

"Oh my he was the sweetest thing. He used to sit out with the sheep and try to ride them. Had them by the horns and everything," she laughs and I join her. "He got a few black eyes but it never stopped him.

"As he got older, girls became more interesting to him. When he was in third grade he snatched up one of my rings and gave it to the girl he was crushing on that week. We made him ask her parents for it back."

"Jaysus, that's adorable."

The front door opens and shuts. Edward and Bernard step into the kitchen, with Edward smiling like he's won some prize. His smile slowly fades as he sees his mother smiling at him like he's just a little kid. "You're telling her stories about me aren't you?" he sighs, expecting it already.

"Of course, honey," she says, sounding devious and very much like Edward.

"We do have some of the best stories," Bernard says to me.

"Pictures too," Linette adds, "now where did I put them?"

"No I think we're fine," Edward says quickly, grabbing my wrist and pulling me after him.

"Oh but it was getting fun."

We walk outside and make our way to his room in the barn. 

"What did your father want?" I ask.

"He wanted me to talk about us. It seems we've done a good job."

"Your mother did the exact same. Planned it all out too."

He laughs under his breath. "What did she ask you?"

"She asked when I'll be having your children," I say bluntly, distaste clear in my choice of words.

His steps falter. "Mary, I'm sorry. That's umm-" He looks like he'd rather be dead than have this conversation like this.

"It was a lot to process at once. You being my friend and all." I get that sick feeling deep in my stomach and I don't doubt he feels it too. 

"My father asked when I was going to marry you." He changes the subject as easily as he can. "He said you seem smart, you keep me in line and you're extremely easy on the eyes. He thinks I'm stupid for not making you mine yet."

I don't know how well I can handle all this; these feelings. 

"I did learn that you liked to try to ride the sheep when you were younger." I send him a grin and he rolls his eyes.

"Well we didn't have horses."

"And the ring you gave away. Anything about that?" 

"Let's not talk about rings. If my parents hear they'll think I'm proposing." He wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me to him for the first time today.

Things will get easier after we leave tomorrow and get back to our normal lives. I'll be able to act normally again, see our friends and continue avoiding Edward.

"What about this car crash everyone brings up?" I ask, taking up the ladder with him behind me.

He steps up after me and closes the door. "I was seventeen when I rolled my car. I swear upon my life I saw someone in the road and swerved."

"Was there doubt that someone was there?" I ask.

"They didn't find anyone," he says defeatedly. "Everyone is convinced I was drunk but no one would give me a breathalyzer so I could prove myself. I walked away without a scratch but the car was unsalvageable."

"My god," I whisper to myself. "I do believe you. About the man. If you were drunk you would have told the truth. Just be careful god damn it."

"Says the one who was stabbed less than two weeks ago." He reaches out and brushes his fingers across my side where the stitches have mostly dissolved. 

I swat his hand away. "Fine. Both of us need to try not to die." There's a pause, I decide to fill with another question. "Who was the sour guy who stormed off when you showed up last night?"

"His name is Seth Cobleigh. The jackass hates me because I wouldn't let him get away with taking advantage of a drunk girl." He spits his name like it pains him to say. I don't blame him.

"And the others still talk to him?" I ask, my brow furrowed in confusion. 

"They don't blame him because he was drunk to," he bites out and sits down on the edge of his bed. "I still hate this place."

"Don't worry. Tomorrow we'll go back and..." I stop, remembering something I should have done yesterday. "convince Anne not to kill me."

He laughs as I pull out my phone and dial her number. It rings and I walk to the corner of the room with my back to him.

"Mary Read you have explaining to do," she says sternly, forgoing any other type of greeting.

"I wanted to talk earlier but I've been busy-"

"It's been two days and you never even said you made it. You had me worried sick."

"I'm sorry Annie," I sigh.

"Now that that's done with," she says calmer and more like herself. "How have you been?"

"I've been well."

"And Edward."

"Also well."

"And his parents?"

"Are nice."

"You can speak in sentences longer than three words," she laughs.

"It's just been a long two days."

"Tell me about it," she inquires.

"I'd rather tell you when I get back."

"He's in the room with you isn't he?" she asks.

"Yes."

"Should have known."

"How has everyone been?"

"They've been good. A little curious about why you and Edward disappeared but I told them you went off on an unknown adventure and Edward went to see family."

"It's better than them thinking anything."

"Or is it?" She sounds sly like a fox.

Edward walks up behind me and wraps his arms around my waist. I attempt to shrug him off but he only burrows his face in the crook of my neck.

"Mary?" Anne says after I forget to respond.

"Yeah sorry. I just got distracted."

One of his hands reach up to cup my breast and the other playing at my inner thigh. I step away but he pulls me back into him with his traitorous hands.

"So how have you spent the last few days?"

"Last night we met some of his friends and slept in his parents car but other than that nothing really of substance. The reunion is tonight."

"Has he been treating you well?"

"What do you mean?"

"He's not acting like an ass or flaunting around... you know because you're pretending to be together." She sounds on the brink of laughter.

"No. He's kept his boundaries like I said." I draw back my arm and ram my elbow into his gut. He grunts and steps off, leaving me with a smile. "It's been fun but I can't wait to get back and wear my old clothes again."

"You leave tomorrow right?"

"Yep."

"Just wanted to know," I hear the smile in her voice.

"I guess I'll talk to you later."

"Yep. See you tomorrow night."

"Bye."

"Bye."

I hang up the phone and turn to Edward, angry but also feeling like I could laugh. "Edward James Kenway, so help me I will slit your throat."

He's already jumping down the ladder and running towards the woods. I follow close behind, making up time.

I break the entrance of the woods and run after him. He laughs from ahead and I can't help but to join him. 

I grab his waist and pull him to the ground with me in a heap of limbs and twigs. It's beautiful out here.

Before he can open his eyes I act in a way I don't expect myself to.

I pepper his face with small kisses and I can tell he's taken aback. A kiss to the cheek, chin, scar, forehead, and nose. 

He grabs me around the waist and uses his other hand to hold my head still. He smiles up at me, guiding me down towards him.

I let him. I haven't felt his touch in awhile and I miss it. I shouldn't miss it.

His lips press hard against mine and everything I feel is brought down to the warmth of his embrace. His soft lips move against mine, his hands playing in my hair.

The kiss breaks and his eyes travel over each inch of my face. "You're beautiful," he breaths.

I scoff at him and silence those words with my mouth.


	11. Caring Too Much

Chapter 11  
"Ready to go?" I ask drawing Edwards attention after I've watched him change into his slacks and white shirt.

I changed in his closet while he wasn't looking and the look on his face when he turns, finding me wearing something that makes his knees visibly weak, makes me smile like a devil.

"Damn, Mary," he breathes, crossing the room to place his hands on me.

I slip past him, smirking as he clenches his jaw. "Hands off," I tease. "I'm not a prize to be won."

"You tease," he scoffs. "I can't help but to want to touch you."

"Maybe if you wait I'll let you have more than a touch."

"Now I won't be able to think of anything else." He cocks his head to the side and smiles. "You look stunning Ms. Read."

"And you yourself Mr. Kenway."

He takes my hand and pulls me to him, resting his forehead on my shoulder and pointedly looking down. "They aren't going anywhere," I mumble.

"Tomorrow you're going to put on that binder and you'll hide from me." He sounds so matter of fact.

I know. That's kinda the plan. "Edward, I'm still me when I'm James." I reassure. "No, you won't be able to see me in things like this but I think you'd rather have me without any clothes than in some frilly thing. Always knew you were a sap."

He kisses my collar bone softly. "You know me too well," he laughs. It doesn't matter which woman it is, he'd always like her better without clothes.

He straightens and walks to the door, grabbing his jacket off the bed. 

"Where is this at exactly?"

"A restaurant one of my old classmates now owns. Only sixty of us will show. Hey," he places a hand on my shoulder. "Just until the end of the night, then it's over."

I nod. "But don't forget what I said. I do all the touching and you keep your hands off."

"I know. This doesn't mean I like the rule but I can follow it." He smiles.

"If we could just lay low I'd be grateful."

"Trust me, I don't even want them to know I'm here."

"And your Caroline. If-"

"She's not mine Mary." His face darkens under my words and I realize I've been to brash.

"Fine. If Caroline is there will you be okay?" I know this is a thin line, but I have to tread it.

"I... will be fine."

"Edward you still love her." I see it clearly. He'll never not care for her.

"I know," he says bitterly. "But she's married and with some other mans child. It hardly matters." He drops his hand and clenches it at his side.

"It gets easier Kenway." 

"What do you know?" he snaps, pain in his eyes. "She was my everything."

My chest aches and throbs painfully. He's always wanted truths. He can have some now. 

The image of his face, unforgiving and broken. His words weren't meant to be as cold as they were but that didn't make up for the pain I felt. It was just supposed to be a fling but it was... more than that for me.

"Yeah, what do I know?" I ask darkly. "I don't know how it feels to be told that nobody could ever love me because I'm a lie. That I'm not good at showing affection so I don't deserve it from anyone else. That I'd rather die alone before I would let someone in and maybe he was right. What do I fucking know?"

My eyes burn but I won't stoop so low as to cry over my own afflictions. It's hard to breathe. Every breath makes my lungs burn and throat ache.

His face falls as I speak, a mask of regret washing over him. "You aren't those things," he argues.

I laugh. I find it extremely funny. "They weren't lies. That's why it hurts so much."

"No-"

"I shouldn't have lied. It doesn't get better."  
-  
The car ride was silent, neither of us spoke a word and I'm glad. I was harsh. He was harsh. We shouldn't have treated each other as such but I'll be damned if I'm the first to apologize.

We pull up to a restaurant, red brick covering the outside and light shining through the windows.

"I'm sorry," he bites out.

"I'm sorry too."

Then we get out. I walk beside him but neither of us move closer like we usually do. I think he gets it now.

He pulls open the door and holds it for me. I walk inside and wait for him to take his place beside me once again to play the part. I reluctantly wrap my arm around his waist and he does the same. 

It's lively inside. Tables are spaced out so that there's a small open space towards the front of the room. A man, quirky looking, stands at the front shuffling through cards.

"Edward?" A man says, stopping beside him. "Wow it's been a long time."

"It has." I release my grip on his waist and he shakes the mans hand. 

I stop listening to the conversation, still stuck on the too harsh words I let out onto someone who didn't deserve it. I shouldn't have poured out like that, even if he instigated. 

I can't continue to use my own past as a reason to hurt those who care for me but he shouldn't have known and now he's going to try to make me think that's not the truth. He'll continue to deny it, even if it's only to himself that will believe it.

"...and who's your pretty lady?"

I turn to the man and stand in his face. "I'm no ones pretty lady. Now scamper back to the hole you crawled out of." I send him a smile laced with malice.

"Watch yourself little lady." It sounds like a threat. He walks away after sending a similar glance to Edward. 

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have," I murmur but don't sound very regretful.

"Didn't like him much anyway." He sounds disinterested in my apology. I knew he would give up on me at some point. I didn't expect I'd happen so quickly.

He leads me to an empty table, gazes following us and quiet murmurs being left in our wake. I sit beside him, looking around the room at the twenty something's. Some even brought their kids.

"James," a voice says in greeting and I almost perk up before realizing I don't know that voice and they don't know me.

"Mary," Edward says softly.

I turn to him, wanting to punch myself at the worried look on his face. "What is it?"

"Are you okay? I just..." He doesn't know what else to say so he doesn't say anything else.

"I'm fine."

"Talk to me," he urges. "I didn't want-"

"Edward, Mary, we've been looking for you," Nick says taking a seat beside Edward and it seems he brought, well, everyone else.

His words die on his lips as he looks up at me, dejected.

I smile weakly and take his hand in mine to show him... something. I don't even know what I want him to perceive it as.

He leaves a quick peck of a kiss on my lips, which is violating the one rule I gave him, and turns to talk to Nick.

But that rule was made before something very important. It was made before we were together the first time and before it was admitted that feelings were involved. I could still kill him for that. He could have just pretended he didn't want anything outside our physical relationship but he didn't and I didn't break it off. I continued to let him hold me, kiss me, and sleep by my side because I didn't realize I wanted that. I don't want to want that.

"Mary, you look so pretty," Liz says sitting down beside me with her, I'm guessing, fiancé because of her ring and his lack of one.

That's not a compliment I'm used to. I'm usually complimented on my skills or that I'm handsome by someone a little too drunk.

"Thank you. You as well." And she is, wearing a knee length black dress that dips low in the center of her chest.

"Are you and Edward all right?" she asks quietly.

"Why do you ask?" Are we so obvious?

"He seems on edge. Not at all like he was last night." 

"It's nothing to worry about." I shake my head and smile innocently. It's getting harder to force the smiles I wish I could be using to make things right.

"If you say so." She smiles again, happy. "You're good for him. Just pretend not to hear what the others say."

"What are they saying?" I'm almost intrigued to hear how they see us.

She swallows hard and once again glances around. "They um... see you as the person Edward's using. Like they think he did to Caroline."

"That's a laugh," I say bitterly. We've both just been using each other. "I don't think he's used anything other than alcohol in his life but it's not my place to call."

She laughs into her palm. "They only think that because he left town. She was the one who left him."

"He's told me." 

Her partner sits up closer to her and wraps his arm over her shoulders to draw her attention. She winks at me and nods toward the blonde man behind me.

I turn to look at him, his hand reaching out but pulling back upon remembering my words. "Are you doing okay?" he asks quietly.

"I think I can handle conversation," I say simply and touch his arm, making the conversation look intimate enough that others won't interrupt. "The real question is, are you doing okay?"

"I'm fine." He smiles but it looks more false than anything else.

"We'll leave as soon as we can."

"Attention," a male voice calls. "Will everyone get seated."

A few people take their seats and turn to the guy awkwardly shuffling at the front of the house. 

"Whose he?" I ask Edward quietly.

"Class president. Name's Fred," he whispers back.

"It's good to see everyone back in the same room. It's been five years now since our days in the high school and here we are to catch up with everyone." A round of applause is given and I can't help but look for a head of reddish hair. I don't find one. "First off we'll start with passing back the letters you wrote to your future self as a freshman."

Edward cringes. "It could be bad," he says to me, watching a few of his former classmates walking around, passing out letters.

"This one's yours Edward," a woman says handing him one.

It's a plain white envelope, his name scrawled across the front like he learned to write his name only the day before. He hesitates before placing his finger in the slit and tearing it open.

He pulls out the letter and opens it. I watch him, his expression changing from a small smile to a sad look than an even bigger smile.

"You can read it if you want," he offers without looking up, knowing I'm watching him.

He puts the paper in my hands and I start to read the partially crumbled letter.

Dear future self,

Fuck you for making me write this letter that no one but me will read. Thanks. You should probably have a job. That's a good thing to have. Also a girlfriend. She has to be hot. I know that Caroline is crushing on me so if it's her I know I did well. If you don't have anyone I'm gonna be really lame and should have just dropped out of school. The military is always an option. If you've got nothing better there's always that. You should probably tell the girl you brought with you that she's beautiful if you hope to score.

Past self

I smile stupidly at the paper. Yep. He was still an idiot when he was 15.

"I think that last part was referring to you," he says matter-of-factly. 

I hand it back but don't say the thing I want to. Nows not the time for things like that. 

"Charming as ever," I say sarcastically and pat his shoulder.

"Please, I'd like to meet the younger you." 

"I was a terrible kid. You think I'm a hothead now," I scoff.

He smiles, mostly to himself, and tucks the letter into his pocket. "Knowing that this is how you'd turn out I'd be able to take anything you'd throw at me."

I cast my eyes over at him. He doesn't look away. 

"Those things would be literal objects," I joke but I'm not too sure about how much I'm joking.

He laughs and takes my hand in his, squeezing it, his calloused fingers running over my knuckles. It helps a lot. Just the sentiment and stability of his tight grasp.

He brings my hand to his lips and kisses it softly. "A beautiful woman deserves to be treated as such," he says with a sweet smile.

I didn't want his sweet words until he said them to me. I didn't want his feather light touches until he insisted on giving them to me. Stupid man.

"Yes and a handsome man such as yourself deserves one of those," I whisper and take my hand out of his. We need to stop this.

"Come with me," he says, standing and walking to an empty table in the corner.

I sit beside him, the rest of the room locked in deep conversation with no one left to pay any attention to us. "For a woman so beautiful you sure don't like me calling you such," he laughs. 

"I don't need your flattery," I scold.

"Okay but you do care for me. You can't deny that." He smirks and leans in closer to me just to have me sit back.

"No I can't but that doesn't mean that everything is right the way it is. I care for you a great deal and this has been fun but as soon as we get back we can't pretend this will work."

"Our personal life can stay ours unless you want the others to know." He smiles something shitty and places his fingertips against my cheek.

"Damn it Edward. We came here so you could see your old classmates and all you wanna do is talk about us," I sigh, attempting to stay lighthearted. 

"That's right because if you weren't here I would have already done something stupid and embarrassing." 

"We'll talk when we get back to your parents house. For now you need to play nice." I sit forward and straighten the collar of his dress shirt. He refused to button it all the way up, leaving the first two buttons open, one of his tattoos peeking over the top.

He smiles at the attention. "Fine, but you can't get out of this one." 

"I know. Now let's go you're friends have been staring at us." I look back over his shoulder and wave at the group that quickly turn away, red faced.

He laughs and stands to head back over.

"I'm going to go to the restroom," I excuse myself, and leave him to answer their questions.

It takes a lot not to subconsciously walk into the mens room as I push open the heavy wooden door of the women's. There's no one inside. I stand in front of the newly washed mirror and run my fingers though my tangled hair. 

I never much liked it down, always hating how it disguised the sharp lines of my face. It makes me look softer, a few locks hiding the top of my scar.

My top is tight, not around my breasts but my waist in a way that pushes everything up. The bra was almost unnecessary. Luckily he hasn't noticed it and hopefully he won't.

The door opens and I don't pay any mind as a woman takes up place beside me at the mirror.

Why does this top keep trying to slip? I grab the material under my armpits and hike it up but it doesn't do much.

"So you're the woman everyone's talking about."

I sigh, not wanting this conversation again. "That would be me."

"Mary, right? I'm Jess." She offers me her hand to shake.

I turn back to the mirror and pretend to finish with my hair, after shaking her hand and head for the door.

"Everyone says you met on a cruise. Is their any truth to all this or is it just hot air?" she asks, acting like I owe her an answer.

I bite my tongue. I don't have to be me I just have to play the part. "We met in the Navy," I say with a fake smile.

"Wow, he really did go," she says to herself.

"Of course he did," I defend, this is less of the part I'm playing and more of the impulse to defend a friend. "Became an officer before we left."

"Good for him."

I turn and walk out, walking to be by Edward again. These people are so interested in others lives I'd be surprised if they had lives of their own.

Edward stands along the far wall with some friends but seems locked in conversation with a pretty woman I didn't see the night before. I've never wanted to be in touch with the emotions I feel but I just don't feel right. She looks extremely comfortable, standing a little too close to him. 

I need to talk to Anne anyway and now seems like a good time. I slip out the front door and dial Anne's number. 

It continues to ring but she doesn't pick up. "Fuck." I redial and after the fifth ring it picks up.

"Kidd? What is it?" She didn't call me Mary. She only calls me Kidd when others are around.

"Anne... I... It's personal and I need to talk to you."

"Oh... OH. Give me a sec." I wait a few seconds, listening to her scold Jack from the other end. "Okay we can talk now. Are you alright. Did something happen?"

"I'm okay. I just need something away from this. So many people and I feel like the odd man out."

"Where's Kenway," she asks, angry. "Did he leave you on your own."

"No, I he's inside talking to someone."

"Are you jealous? Oh my god you are," she squeaks.

"No, I don't want to interrupt him if..."

"Mary, you interrupting him would make his night. Maybe set the both of you up for something..."

"Annie, no. We have enough problems."

"What kind of problems?" she asks slyly.

I sigh, "We've already had an argument and it's only been two days."

"You two are in deep," she laughs. "Once you stop denying it to yourself, go back inside and plant a kiss on him. You're supposed to be dating."

"You're no help," I scoff.

"And Mary?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't forget the present I gave you. You should have been taking it all weekend now."

"I'm not gonna need it," I insist, her light laughter reaching me. 

"I hope you do. Now go get your boyfriend," she says mockingly. 

"Thanks Annie."

"Anytime and you should be wearing the lacy-"

"Yeah and it's really uncomfortable so let's not talk about it."

She laughs at me, knowing I'd have this problem. "You'll give that man a heart attack."

I groan, hating how well she picks up on our attraction to one another and she's not even supposed to know. "I only wore it because it doesn't look right without it," I argue.

"I think it's time for you to go back or he'll think you ran off."

"Okay, okay, bye Anne."

"Bye."

I place it back in my pocket and step back though the door. The noise hits my ears in waves of quite murmurs and loud laughter. The warmth of the room reaches me like a child's security blanket. 

I set out for the blonde I'm here for. He's still talking but as I look at him I notice how uncomfortable he looks. His eyes cast over the room every now and then and he doesn't seem very engaged. 

"Kenway," I say in greeting. His face lights up like a child on Christmas. I place a kiss to his cheek as his arm finds it's way around me.

"I'm guessing you went to other places than just the bathroom."

"I talked to Anne."

"What did she have to say?" He asks, knowing it will be interesting.

"I was just checking up with her and she reminded me of a few things."

"I'll ask when we get back. For now," Edward says addressing the group of his friends. "They wanted to ask if you have any good stories about our time in service."

"Of course, I don't think a day went by that something notable didn't happen." I turn away from him and to the group we drank with last night. "I remember the time we were in boot camp and we were just finishing up but we still lived on site. I didn't know him very well at all but Thatch was a friend of mine and a friend of his. Thatch said that a scrawny thing like me couldn't carry another man around and I asked him who I should carry then and he said Kenway. 

"So I marched up to him and threw him over my shoulders. Paraded around with him on my back for ten minutes until our friend Anne got bored and so, as she explained after, to 'make things more exciting' decided to trip me in front of a group of high ranking officers.

"That was before we realized one of those men were going to be our future Captain."

They laugh, visualizing such a scene as the one that really happened. I almost forgot that that was him.

"You didn't tell them how I knocked the wind out of you and dragged you away by your ankles as they watched us," he laughs.

"Gave me scratches up and down my back. We didn't even know each other then." I smile at him, thinking of how much has changed. 

"You two are hilarious," someone says between fits of laughter. To be honest that was one of the most embarrassing moments of my life.

"The best part is, she could have carried me all day. Some random guy slung on her shoulders. We didn't even speak afterwards."

"I just laughed at him from afar."

"Of course you would," he jokes.

"Now I want some good stories about Edward growing up." Everyone takes a moment to think.

"I've got one from kindergarden," Angel pipes up. "He used to be a really reckless kid and one day in the fall he went out to the playground and climbed onto top of the play set. Like the covering that wasn't meant to be climbed and yelled something I can't remember before jumping off into a pile of leaves.

"The teachers were freaking out but he walked away with only a few scratches."

"Sounds like him," I laugh. 

"That was memorable," Edward chimes in.

Nick clears his throat and smiles at me. "What about the time in sixth grade that someone broke a bottle of perfume and old Mrs. Miller couldn't even smell it so he picked up the glass, sat on the chair in front of her desk, and talked to her while playing with it and she didn't even notice until he walked back to us and left it on her desk. If took a full twenty minutes before she asked who broke the glass and this asshole pretends he don't know shit.

"To top it off he put his hand into the spilt perfume and started wiping it on everyone. It was so bad everyone got a headache and we were all sent home because they thought our room had a gas leak."

"I got us a day off didn't I?" Edward jokes.

"You haven't changed one bit," I say fondly. 

"How long have you been together?" Tim asks. We haven't went over what we'd tell them.

I look up at him, letting him answer. "Four months but we've known each other for three years. Or at least of each other."

"We're glad you two are happy," Abigail says warmly.

Edward and I look at each other and smile. We've done well at being a couple here and it's been fun.

We speak for almost an hour more, discussing jobs, the housing market, and other meager things. Kenway stays close by my side the whole time, an arm around my waist to keep me with him.

"You ready to go?" He asks me.

I nod to him and he says his goodbyes before we exit to the parking lot. Something doesn't feel right. 

"You shouldn't have came back, Kenway," an older man calls from across the parking lot. I haven't seen him before but I recognize the man beside him; the man I snapped at when we first got here and that Seth Cobleigh. "Bought yourself a whore too. How much did she cost?"

"Am I supposed to be offended?" I yell back.

"I can go wherever the hell I want mate," Edward says nonchalantly, hand wrapped around my waist tightly. "We're leaving tomorrow. Have fun with your shitty town."

We duck into the car and hear a muffled, "don't come back" from behind us. He drives us out and onto the main road.

"Who the fuck were they?" No wonder he left this. They're worse than the people I grew up around.

"Assholes who have made my life hell for a longtime. Tom Cobleigh and his son and a guy named Julian. They hate my family, mostly because of me."

"They're right pricks aren't they?" I say gruffly. The politics of a small town cause headaches that aren't worth it for anyone but the person who caused the squabble.

"We'll just leave tomorrow and be done with this." He smiles again. "Now you promised to talk to me."

"When we got back," I add, smirking. "Just wait."  
-  
"It time," Edward says, stepping through the door after me.

I walk to the opposite side of the room with him trailing after me. I turn to him, staying quiet, as I place a hand on his chest and move it up to his neck. 

His stubble scratches my palm and he waits for me to say something. I won't. After today we won't have the time for this nor moments to talk. I don't want to hear the words that could sway me into something stupid. 

"You have to talk sometime," he jokes to make light of the situation.

"There are more pressing matters," I say slyly. I reach behind my back and tug down the zipper, letting the material pool at my feet.

In a single moment he surges up to me and kisses my lips. The warmth of his chest pressed against mine with the thudding of his heart that accompanies it, melts away my previous inhibitions. It's only him. An arm around my waist and another in my hair, tugging lightly in the way he has found I like.

He places his forehead against mine, leaving my lips that now feel puffy from the attention. "I never thought I'd see the day you wear a bra," he whispers, a smile pulling at the corners of his lips.

"Shut up," I laugh, squeezing his arm.

"You're distracting me."

"Not at all," I joke.

His hands roam over my sides, poking at my ribs and running along the fabric of the bra. He nuzzles into my neck. 

"I've been taking birth control," I say lowly, pulling the tie out of his blond hair.

"You're full of surprises." His warm breath brushes my neck, his body pressed to mine. "The thong was a nice touch."

"I've never been more uncomfortable before in my life." 

"You don't need it. Like you said, 'I'm easy'," he jokes and kisses at my jawline. "But you do look hot as hell with it."

"Less talking and less clothes." I start on the buttons of his shirt, pulling the fabric off his shoulders to reveal the toned muscle of his tattooed chest.

I reach for his belt but he stops me and unhooks my bra with ease. My binder doesn't have wires that dig into my skin like that does. 

He holds my breast, squeezing and pulling lightly, as brings my mouth back to his. I unhook his belt and help him out of his pants.

He continues to kiss me hard as his thumbs hook underneath the thin fabric of the thong. I place my hands on his and urge him on, breaking away from his lips to step out of them. 

I pull his off as well, leaving him bare to me once again. 

He walks to his bag and unzips the front pocket, pulling out a condom. I take it from him, snatching his hand in mine and leading him to his bed. I lean him back and open the foil covering. I pinch the top, rolling it down his length. 

I lay forward onto his muscled chest, straddling his waist with my hips. I kiss him, trying not to think about how gentle he's being. His hand lightly stroking my bare back. His other, cupping my cheek like he would a porcelain doll.

I bite his pudgy bottom lip and pull back. He can't hold back his smile. 

"I'm not gonna break, Kenway. You can be rough," I say playfully. 

His hands move to my hips and grip them, hard. His lips going to my neck to suck and bite at the soft skin.

"Better," I moan. I realize I've been rolling my hips against him.

I sit up and shimmy back just a bit to line myself up with him. I sink down onto him, my mouth falling open in pleasure as I press my hips flat against his.

"Fuck," he grunts, he fights to keep his eyes open for a moment, as his grip tightens, promising to leave finger size bruises.

I put my hands on his chest, the muscle relaxing and contracting under my fingertips. I don't waste time with a slow pace, fucking him hard and fast, his hands helping with the motion of my hips.

Every move pleasurable, every one of his grunts urging me on. His pupils, blow wide, look up at me with longing and lust. A small smirk on his lips.

I've wanted him like this for a long time. Longer than I'd like to admit. He pisses me off all too often but I always notice how attractive he his and how he can be charming when he wants to. I hated having those thoughts about a person I hardly knew but damn. I wouldn't be here now if it wasn't for Anne punching Vane in the face.

He takes one hand off my hip and places it on my clit, rubbing firmly. I lean against his chest as his hips jerk up to meet mine. I bite his shoulder to keep the sounds that are so desperate to escape, from pouring out of me. I can't let him get that satisfaction.

He rolls us over, staying inside me. Each thrust jolting pleasure through me. My hands go to his back, scratching with dull nails against tense muscle. 

"Harder," I say forcefully, wrapping my legs around his waist. 

A sheen of sweat covers his brow. His entire body on display for me. Quiet noises escape his chest to be grunted into my ear.

"Mary," he moans lowly. 

"Edward. I won't last much longer." 

I feel the pressure and heat low in my belly. He smirks and presses a kiss to my lower lip, then my upper, teasing.

"Kiss me you piece of shite," I laugh and pull him down to me with a hand to the back of his head, tangled in his locks. 

I have a feeling my hips will ache tomorrow.

"Jesus you're beautiful," he says between two heavy, sloppy kisses. 

He leans up, not slowing his relentless pace. His hand goes back to my clit, rubbing and pinching. 

"Fuck." I can't hold on any longer. My cunt clenches tightly around him, waves of pleasure pulsing in time with my heartbeat. 

"Shit." He leans back over me, burying his face in my neck and stilling himself.

We stay like that, attached at the hips, until the throbbing stops and he pulls out. He rolls off, moving to the side and placing the condom in the waste basket. I grab a tissue off his nightstand and wipe him off after doing so to myself. 

I sit up afterward and slide on his shirt. "Mary, are you okay?" he asks sounding disappointed but trying not to show it.

"I need a smoke." I walk to the door, feeling conflicted.

"If you're sure."

I grab my cigarettes off the night stand and open the door to sit on the edge of the balcony, resting on the door behind me. I take one out and light it, taking a deep drag.

I don't want to think. I just want the calm and quite of the breeze and the cool night air. My skin is still flushed pink, sweat making the shirt cling to me. The wood beneath me feels solid in such a way that mimics the stability I wish for. But I can't stop thinking.

Edward James Kenway. I don't have words to describe my feelings. I hate him. I care for him. I want to understand him. I want so many things.

He's an excellent bed partner. I'll ache comfortably for a day or so. His back might burn for awhile. I've a new hickey to cover and he, a bite mark. 

He didn't get upset when I left him. He respected my space and let me go. I know he must be asking himself what he did wrong. I don't think many women could walk out on him or have. He shouldn't blame himself. 

I... care deeply for him. I have to let him know sooner or later. 

How much longer can this last? I've said next to nothing about myself whereas he's told me everything. 

I've always known how I feel about him. Always understood but hated the words that described those feelings. I just wanted a friend but now?

I stand and let myself back in. Edward stares up at the ceiling until he sees me. He smiles and lifts up the blanket beside him, not asking about why walked I off. I curl into bed beside him, tossing the shirt back on the floor. 

I curl into his side and he nuzzles his face into my hair. "The sex was great," he laughs. 

"It was," I add just as happily. "You're not too bad, Kenway."

"Of course I'm not. Oh and say my name more often." He smirks into the skin of my neck

"Shut up," I groan. "Is your back okay?"

"It feels like a sunburn," he laughs. "I won't be able to forget this for awhile."

"Good."

I curl tightly into him. Letting him hold me to his chest. I've put James away for a few days to feel this. To have this with him and damn me to hell I want this.

"Thank you," I whisper quietly.

"I care about you, Mary," he mumbles.

"I know."  
-  
I wake to a warm bed and strong arms around my waist. His warm breath against my ear. 

I shimmy out of his grip, leaving a pillow in my place.

I look down at my sides seeing the bruises on one and the side with the almost dissolved stitches, completely fine. He was thinking of how I felt, how comfortable I was, how his hands could help or hinder me. 

Why does he care so much? 

I slide my shirt on over my head and get the pants halfway up my hips before Prince Charming starts to stir.

"Mary get back in bed," he whines, not even opening his eyes to check if I'm really there. 

I walk to him, pulling off the blanket, crawling into the bed and laying on top of him, straddling him like I did last night.

"Why did you put clothes on?" he complains. 

"Because if you want time to say goodbye we'll have to leave soon." I card my fingers through his still untied hair.

"We have time." He makes that purring noise and smirks.

I lean down and kiss him, his tongue slipping into my mouth. We fall into a comfortable rhythm, smiling into the kiss.

The door opens and I all but leap off him. Edward pulls the blanket up to cover himself just as quickly as I jumped off.

"I'm... uh... sorry. I should have knocked," the intruder stammers. 

"Morning Benard," I says with an uneasy smirk, glancing at Edward, who looks petrified. "What brings you here?"

"Linette wanted me to check on the both of you and make sure you were okay. I guess I'll just leave you to it." He nods awkwardly, his entire demeanor, apologetic.

I'll have to think twice before getting touchy during the day. I know Edward's probably extremely embarrassed. He just got caught naked by his dad. 

Bernard leaves, shutting the door behind him. I hear Edward finally let out a stale breathe.

"That was embarrassing," I sigh.

He pulls me back to him, kissing me again, just to drown out the embarrassment.

"One more thing..." his dad says as he reopens the door. 

"Fucking hell, dad!" Edward curses and Benard backs out of the room, locking it from the inside and shutting it.

"I'd say you're awake now," I joke, rolling off him, and tugging the blanket away. I'm so glad I dresses.

He groans, pulling himself up and dressing. "Only a month ago you said you'd rather be abstinent than be with me right?" he mocks.

"I did and I also clearly remember how flustered you were when Anne said we could have kissed."

"That's because I was thinking of kissing you. Then Anne said it and I snapped out of it." He touches the side of my face softly, only having a pair of pants on. "I was thinking about your lips," his thumb grazes my bottom lip. "and how they'd feel on my-"

"Shut up," I swat his hand off, a smile already coming to his face.

"I was going to say lips but that might have crossed my mind too." He slides on a shirt and a denim jacket, smirking like he won some invisible game. "Jaysus, my mum will be excited to hear," he laughs.

"I feel bad," I say truthfully. "I've played her and now she'll think, of all things to think, that I'm going to carry your child." 

"Don't feel bad," he sighs, putting his head in the crook of my neck and wrapping his arms around my waist. "I brought you here and asked you for help. They expect too much. It seems as if it's time to go home."

I get an uncomfortable feeling every time he calls it our home. "Time to bite the bullet." We pull away and and stuff our belongings, messily, into our bags.

He opens the door and from behind him I see a thin sheet of white covering the ground. It's been a long time since I've seen the snow.

I follow him down and we drop our backpacks. He stands closer to me, the warmth of his body heat seeping through my clothes. "You know how everyone always wants a kiss in the rain? This seems close enough."

He leans me backwards before I can fight him, his arm wrapped around to support my weight. The snow falls around him as I gaze up into his still sleepy eyes. He leans down and kisses me softly. Just a sweet innocent kiss, his lips move with a soft and careful motion that has more security than passion.

I panic, not wanting this to be so loving like the soft press of him feels. I break the chastity of our kiss, my tongue parting his lips and he responds enthusiastically. Our breaths quicken, our bodies pressing against one another greedily, my fears falling away like the sanctity of our kiss. 

He holds me like that for more than just a few fleeting moments. It feels awkward and uncomfortable, like I would have expected but it has all the qualities of a cliche romance movie.

He stands me back up, his eyes searching me for a reaction, his lips smirking.

I spit on the ground an excess of saliva in my mouth that is not mine. "You spit in my mouth." 

He laughs, his voice thick and gravely. He sticks his tongue out at me and moves in as to lick my face. 

I duck away and laugh with him. I haven't been this happy in a long time.


	12. Not Too Careful Steps

"Do you have everything?" Linette asks as she gets into the passenger side. We're finally going home.

"Yes," Edward reassures, "don't worry."

"Are you sure you don't want to stay?" she tries one last time.

"I'm sure. I've had enough of these people," he groans, his arm wrapped around my waist, forcing me to sit in the middle beside him.

He's been extremely touchy feely and I can't say I don't enjoy it just a little bit. 

"I know you aren't planning on coming back for the Holidays but we expect a phone call at the least," Bernard adds. "From you too Mary."

"Of course," I say a bit strained, not knowing whether it could turn out to be a hollow promise or not.  
-  
"Love you mum. Love you dad." Edward leaves a peck on the cheeks of both his parents upon their silent request.

Linette pulls me into a tight hug, almost suffocating me in her shoulder. Bernard offers me another handshake, smiling this time.

I pull my book bag on and hear him whisper something to Edward, with a smile. I didn't expect I'd get in this deep. I feel like I'm stuck in something I never wanted in the first place.

"It was nice meeting you two," I say kindly as me and Edward start to walk away.

"You too, Mary. Have a nice holiday season," Bernard responds, looking content with everything.

"We will. Love you," Edward says just before we step through the door. "Now let's find you a place to change."

He leads me down a hallway and ushers me into an empty bathroom, the same one I changed in before. It seems this place is never very busy. 

He follows me, checking to make sure everyone of them is empty. He paces back to the mirror as I go in.

It's cramped. Little to no room to even set my bag down. I struggle out of my jeans and tug on another pair. 

"Doing okay?" he teases. I can almost see that shitty look of his.

"I'd be better if you'd shut up," I grunt, tugging my binder on, the material catching on my skin.

"You also wanted me to shut up last night but I'm finding myself tired of it." 

I open the door after pulling on a plain shirt and my jacket. He leans against the counter, smiling at me. I walk to the counter pulling my hair back into a small bun and tying up a bandana across my forehead like I always do. There is a sort of reassurance in it. 

"Let's go home, Kenway." I pat his arm, the soft material of his shirt grazing my fingers.

"Yes. We'll finally get to sleep in our own bed."

Of course that's what he's worried about.  
-  
As soon as the elevator doors of our apartment building shut he turns his attention to me. His soft lips pressed to mine, a hand wrapped around me to pull me close. 

I return his affection freely, knowing it won't stop here. I'll end up on top of him, grinding him into our bed like I've wanted to do since this morning.

I cup his ass in my hands, kneading the rounded muscle. His tongue exploring my mouth, his hands tangling in my hair making light tugs.

The door opens and we stop, breaking apart quickly and leaning out to see if anyone is in the hall. Edward glances both ways then smiles and pulls me after him, all but running down the hall. 

I start with the keys, dropping my bag in my rush. He turns me quickly and pins me to the door, my back making a loud thud as his lips go to my neck.

"The fuck was that?" I hear Thatch's distinct voice yell from inside. 

The blond freezes looking back up to me, panic setting into his blue eyes. "What's today's date?" I whisper quietly.

"December 17th," he says quietly, not moving an inch.

God damn it Annie.

I switch places with him, quickly pressing his back to the door and turning the knob. He falls inside landing on the ground, glaring up at me. 

"I keep telling ya not to open the door while you lean on it," I pretend to scold, grabbing our bags from outside the hall and dropping them inside.

"Surprise!" Anne exclaims, stepping over Edward to throw her arms around me. 

"How old are you now a days, Kidd?" Thatch asks from his place on my couch. Hornigold lounges against the kitchen counter, looking as collected as usual, as they all pretend to not notice Edward.

Anne kicks Edward playfully and walks back over to Rackham who has made himself at home in the far corner by the window with the fire escape. Ade sits on the couch with Thatch but at least acts like he's been raised, keeping his feet off it.

"I don't rightly know." The lie comes out smoothly, like it has every other time I've said it.

Hornigold looks at me funny, his brow furrowed and his arms crossed. "How did you make it into the military if you don't even know your age?" 

"I guess they just couldn't turn me down," I say, smug. 

"Why didn't you tell me it was your birthday?" Edward asks after he's picked himself up off the questionably clean carpet. 

"I never celebrate it," I shrug.

"You celebrated last year," Anne whispers under her breath, Hornigold rolling his eyes and Thatch letting out a loud laugh. Rackham, tipsy as ever, has the joke go right over his head.

I glare at her innocent little smile. She just winks and motions her head toward Edward who is collecting his bag off the ground. Anne only knows it's my 'birthday' because of one very apparent reason. 

"So Kidd where did you run off to?" Hornigold asks.

"Just business." I watch Edward walk to our room the subtle change in his walk as his trousers need adjusted.

The others groan, expecting my evasiveness but not wanting to argue. 

"And you Kenway?" He asks Edward from the other room as he throws our stuff into the floor.

"I had to go see my parents."

"Wouldn't have thought you'd have any," Ade jokes. "Thought you were raised by wild animals."

"Very funny," he chides. "When it comes to choices I make they become wild animals."

"Annie?" I question after I've thought on it for a moment. "How did you get in?"

"I took Edwards key." She smirks

"I was wondering where it went." He smirks, drifting back over toward me. He shoots me a look, one I can tell is frustration.

"Well I bought a cake so somebody better eat it or I'll take it back." Thatch interjects, standing, walking to the fridge, pulling out a white iced sheet cake with "Happy Birthday" written in Hornigold's distinct cursive. "I wanted Ben to write that with 'to our favorite little bastard' but he said It'd be too long."

Hornigold rolls his eyes but smiles. "Just because he didn't know the man doesn't mean he deserves to be called a bastard."

"Are we gonna eat or are 'mommy' and 'daddy' going to bicker some more," Rackham cracks as he stumbles up to the counter.

Edward makes a cooing noise at the two of them, laughing at their looks of disgust. 

I walk around the bar and pull a knife out of the drawer. "Wait, I've got candles." Anne pulls a box out of her purse that sits on the counter, placing all three candles on it. 

"Three?" Edward questions. "More like three years after puberty."

I glare at him, through the laughs of our friends. He's going to regret that.

"And yet it's you who lives in the apartment I pay for."

"Do I need to find you some ice, Edward?" Ade asks with a grin.

Anne, trying to hide her laughter, lighting the candles. "Now all of you have to sing." She glances around at the looks of protest.

"I'm not singing," Ben states firmly.

"Is your masculinity a little too fragile for such things?" Anne delivers the line with a smile and a wicked spark in her eyes.

Thatch clasps his hand onto his shoulder firmly. "It's all in good fun Ben. Mumble if you have to."

Ben groans but Anne pays no mind as she starts and the others pick up. It becomes a loud chorus of men who should never sing and Anne. They end up off tune, not even saying the same things and I think Edward threw some welsh in somewhere.

They finish, laughing at themselves. I blow out the candles before collecting them off the top before the wax drips.

"What did you wish for?" Edward asks.

"Probably a woman to warm his bed," Thatch laughs.

"Not that, I've already got one in mind," I say slyly, avoiding Kenway's gaze.

This seems to catch everyone's attention. "What's she like?" Rackham slurs, probably thinking disgusting things about the imaginary woman.

"It's nothing serious. She's just a pretty thing. Kenway's met her, haven't ya?" I ask him, the realization that I'm talking about him makes him smile even if I am referring to him as a woman.

"Don't play her down Kidd, she means a lot to you. You spent the entire trip from the airport talking about her." He smirks, his eyes avoiding Anne like the plague.

Annie leans against the counter, a look of pure satisfaction settled into her. 

"You should bring her around," Thatch says. "I wouldn't mind meeting the woman who has your attention."

"I might but if it means anything I wished that Kenway would pay me his half of the rent."  
-  
"How have your studies been going?" I ask Ade, his face screwing up like he's in physical pain from me just talking about his college work.

"There's so much to do. I almost didn't come in favor of sitting in my dorm and writing an essay that's due in two days. Luckily most of it is finished already," he sighs.

"I've been thinking of going back. Maybe getting a job that would get me more than minimum wage. What are you studying?"

"Anthropology. I'm enjoying it so far even though I've only taken one class of my chosen major. " he jokes, trying not to move too much because of the large amount of cake he's eaten.

"When I was younger I liked psychology but I'm not so sure anymore. To understand the way people work and think."

"I do too. I've figured most of the others out but I don't have you pegged yet," he teases, nudging me.

"You'll be at it a long time if you keep trying." 

"Kidd is one hard nut to crack," Edward interjects seeming to have eavesdropped on our conversation. He leans on the back of the couch where me and Ade sit. "I'm thinking of going back too."

"Well the semester has just started and my roommate and I are looking for two more." 

"I guess you're coming to college with me Kidd," Edward says, placing a heavy hand on my shoulder but removing it quickly when he realizes it's not the best idea to hang on me.

"At least to get my required classes over with before I find something to major in."

It's not what he wants to hear but it's guaranteed time and that's enough. 

"You can come into the admissions office tomorrow they're finishing final enrollment. You know how small the place is." 

"I best be getting home," Thatch yawns. 

"And I'll be driving you," Ben interjects. "You've been drinking out of that flask and I'm not letting you get yourself killed."

He's right, Thatch has been taking sips from a flask he keeps hidden in his coat. He still groans at the thought of riding, as he likes to call it, bitch to Hornigold.

"Happy birthday, Kidd. Go find yourself a pretty lass to bed," Thatch pats my shoulder on his way to the door.

"Happy birthday," says Hornigold, in tow.

"Thanks."

Ade stands, stretching. "I look forward to seeing you two tomorrow and happy birthday." He grabs his coat and keys and heads to the door. "Nice seeing you Anne."

"You too." She almost seems surprised that he said that to her specifically. 

The door doesn't even close before Anne says, "Jack will you wait for me in the car?"

He looks as if he wants to protest but the sweet look she gives him kills his protests and he stomps out, grumbling something about a stupid teen and Annie.

She smirks at us, I haven't moved from my place on the couch and Edward still stands behind me. "How did it go?" she asks, a deeper meaning behind her words.

"It went well," Edward shrugs, "Everyone believed it."

"As if the two of you had to act." Oh, she knows alright. "Your parents loved her didn't they?" 

"Of course. That was the plan," Edward attempts to say passively. 

"I've missed the two of you. I can only take so much of these men at once before I need to speak with someone closer to my age."

"It was nice not having to pretend I'm in love with Kenway," I scoff. "Living with him is hard enough." 

"Oi, who would piss you off if I wasn't here to do it?" 

"No one pisses me off like you do."

Anne clears her throat, our attention snapping back to her. "You know you've a bite mark and your neck right, Edward? And you've a hickey, Mary?"

Neither of us speak up.

"Congratulations." She grabs her jacket turning her back on us and heading for the door.

"Anne wait. It's not like that," I protest, jumping to my feet to stop her.

She turns back, her eyes questioning me. 

I'm at a loss for words caught between my pride and hurting my best mate. 

Kenway speaks up before me. "We're not together, Anne. It's just sex. We're not involved any further. What can I say? She's hot as hell."

I punch his arm, just hard enough. "Ow," he groans.

"I won't mettle but I'm guessing you're the lady she has in mind?" Anne teases.

"You've guessed it," he says proudly.

"I best be heading out. Much longer and Jack will think I stayed to cheat on him with the two of you. We all chipped in to buy you something. I put it under your bed. The others don't know what it is but I assured them you'd like it" She hugs me tightly and does the same to Edward. "You kids have fun," she teases and leaves with the heavy closing of the door.

I stumble back onto the couch.

"Thank god it's over," Edward sighs, rolling over the back of the couch to lay his head on me. "It's your birthday?" He almost sounds offended that I wouldn't tell him.

"That's what you want to talk about?" I groan.

"She'd find out one way or another. We're kind of obvious."

"I know," I groan. 

"But we were even before I knew you were a woman," he feigns deep thought for a moment. "They think we're gay for each other."

"Even you thought you were gay for me."

"I still am."

He smiles up at me, those blue eyes I've admired staring up at me.

"It's not my birthday. It's James Kidd's birthday."

"Who is James Kidd and why are you him?" he asks, speaking softly like one would to a startled animal.

"I might tell you one day," I sigh. "Now what was it we were doing before we came in?"

His face lights up, a devious smirk touching his pink lips, his eyes squinting subtlety as his cheeks push up. His light blue eyes, darkening, his pupils dilating. He sits up and lays me back in the couch trapping me under him and all I want to do is push him off. He likes to take the initiative and I like to rip the rug out from underneath him.

He kisses me, opened mouthed with a little too much tongue but he doesn't seems to care as he grinds his hips against mine, rubbing between my thighs. I roll my hips in time with his, seeking out that feeling.

His hand up by my head slips and he falls to the floor. I can't hold in my laughter. He lays on the floor looking pissed and horny if his tented trousers are any indication.

"I have a present to open." I stand and walk away from him, his audible groans and the creaking of the floor a sign that he follows me.

I walk around the bed and crouch down, pulling out an old shoe box that has been taped shut. I peal the tape off, opening the box. On the inside lid is a small note.

I hope you like it XOXO

I pick up a ball of wrapping paper, unwrapping the thing rolled up inside. It's a knife holster with six slots. I unclip the button of one and unsheathe a throwing knife about twelve centimeters in length. 

Edward smiles at me from across the bed. "You've always liked knifes."

I notice a little note in the bottom beside another something wrapped messily in wrapping paper.

Just in case you're still being a prude

I tense up a bit not even wanted to look at what she got me in front of Edward. He notices my sudden inaction and climbs over the bed to grab the paper out of my box.

He grabs it and unwraps it, holding out what is unmistakably a bullet. Not like the ones you shoot from a gun.

Edward just smiles at it, then glances back up to me, his eyes filled with longing. I sit my new knife set onto the floor beside the bed. "Take your clothes off," I order him and I don't have to ask twice.

I do the same, pulling all of the cloth I wear off and onto the floor. I climb into bed with him, maneuvering him onto his back. He attempts to pull me to him but I stop him. "Wait. I was wondering... If you'd..."

"This is the first time I've ever seen you at a loss for words. Am I that stunning?" He jokes.

"I want to tie you down, Kenway," I can feel my face begin to flush before it goes away just as quick as it came. He looks surprised before I correct myself. "Only if you'd want to and if you don't I'm fine with..."

"Let's do it," he says reassuringly. "I think it might grow on me." He sounds cocky as hell, smirking up at me.

I smile something devilish and climb off him going to my bag in the corner, digging out the leather straps tucked away in the bottom. I climb back in with him, starting with one of his wrists. "When did you get these?" he asks.

"My birthday, last year." 

He laughs most definitely remembering Annie's comment from earlier.

I tie up his other wrist, then his ankles. Facing back to him, I catch his excited look. "If something is painful or something you're uncomfortable with, tell me. I don't want to hurt ya."

I leave a chaste kiss on his lips, crawling down his body, my fingers teasing at his skin leaving small goosebumps in their path. He moves against his ties, pulling them but that only tightens the knots. I kiss one of his nipples lightly, making one quick flick across it with my tongue.

He whimpers, attempting to pull is arms out of the ties. "I'm a sailor, Kenway. You're not getting out of those."

"They're sensitive." His words come out in a gasp. 

"Too much?" I ask.

"No. Damn you look gorgeous." He makes the motion to move his hand before remembering the ties again.

I form my mouth around him, sucking lightly to get him used to the sensation. His hips buck involuntarily.

"Will you take your hair down?" He asks.

That's what he's thinking about? "Why?"

"Because I like it down."

"You do now? Anything else?" I tease, looking up at him, using my hands in the absence of my mouth.

"Well if you insist, your lips are beautiful when they are all red, I love the way you writhe every time I touch you, I like watching you get off, and that thing you do with your-"

I silence his senseless rambling with my lips he said he likes red. I sit up on my knees abruptly, crawling over his shoulders to position myself over his face. I press down, his mouth working at my folds, poking, prodding while his nose rubs against my clit. I grab onto the headboard grinding down on him. 

He attempts to say something, but the sound is muffled. I feel him smile, nipping at me with his teeth. 

"What was that? I can't hear you." I tease.

He sucks hard, causing me to groan involuntary. His laughter, sending a shiver up my spine. I pivot my hips back so my clit sits above his lips.

I look down at his eyes, his light blond eyelashes fanned out, and he winks at me. His lips form around it, pulling and tugging on the sensitive bud. His tongue pushes through flicking rapidly. The quick stimulation, bringing me further.

He presses hard, the warm of his tongue working me over.

I hear the stretch of the leather straps as he begins to fight them, attempting to draw up his knees. I look behind me seeing his legs struggle. He looks painfully hard, throbbing against his stomach. 

One hard drag of his tongue pulls me over the edge. He doesn't stop until I crawl off him, breathing heavily, everything sensitive. I lay on top of his chest, kissing his lips, covered in my release. He moans as my thigh brushes him. I just smile and roll off of him, feeling hot and sticky with sweat. 

"Mary?"

"What?"

"You have the prettiest lips." He turns to me with a dopey smile before it fades and he glances down himself. "Could you..." He lets it trail off.

"I want you to tell me what you want."

He raises an eyebrow and smirks. "But I know you've got ideas."

"I could leave you here for the night," I shrug, beginning to step out of the bed.

"I want you to fuck me, please. I'm going insane."

I crawl down him, to his hips and breathe a warm breath onto his cock, precum leaking from the top.

I reach my right hand down between my legs coating my fingers. He all but jumps out of his skin when I prod at his ass.

"It'll be okay, Kenway. I promise I won't hurt you," I soothe. He nods but his body is tense, trying to curl away from me. I take my hands away from him. "We don't have to if you're uncomfortable."

"I'll try it. If you had different parts we would have already done this by now." He smiles down at me, uneasy but with some excitement.

I place my index finger at his entrance, stroking around but not pushing. I give him time to get used to the feeling before I push a little. He clenches even if he didn't want to.

"You have I relax," I tell him. "It's easier that way."

I run my free hand over his stomach, calming him enough to get my first knuckle in. I pull out just a bit and move in again getting a bit more inside him. 

He groans, pain etched into his expression. I continue, making small strokes until I've pushed in my entire finger. I stop, letting him get used to the intrusion. Curling my finger, I lift up, rubbing it against his prostate.

"Fuck," he curses.

I pull my finger out, curled up and thrust it back in. He groans as I curl it again and repeat. 

"Why didn't I know it felt like this?" 

"Cause you've never tried." I add another finger, him tensing up again. "If you scratch my back I'll scratch yours."

I could lose myself in his sounds, the way his face displays his emotions like an open book that I get the privilege of reading. His eyes, glossed over. His lips, half open, breathing deeply. Yes this man is going to kill me.

He looks like he could lose himself any second, his back arches, his leg muscles tighten. I pull out of him, his breathing still rapid and move into his lap, ready to make due on my promise of fucking him.  
-  
I fall, exhausted, off of him. Drenched in sweat, Edwards skin flushed red.

"It's three in the morning, Kenway," I yawn. I sit up on my knees and loosen the knots around his wrists and ankles. 

He curls tightly into my back, his face buried in my neck, his hands skimming my sides. "It's the price I pay to keep you satisfied."

"We might not get much of a chance to do this again soon when we move into a dorm." 

He groans, his arms pulling me to his chest, his hands roaming my stomach. "Sounds like you'll miss this."

"I will," I say truthfully but shake off the heavy air. "How could I not miss having such a pretty man between my thighs?" He nips at my ear, amused.

I reach my hand around to play with his locks. "I wouldn't want to be between anyone else's," he whispers.

"I want to tell you Edward... that I... you..." I don't know what I want to say. I can't process what I'm feeling.

"You don't have to say it. I know what you mean."


	13. Small Changes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I've been on a hiatus. I've been in India for the past three weeks and I've had zero time to write anything. This chapter is definitely not one of my favorites but bear with me because I know where the story is going now

"I'm gonna miss this place," Edward sighs.

"You've lived here for three weeks and we weren't even here for three days of them."

He throws his arm over my shoulder which I shrug off. "We've had some good memories. Our first kiss was here. The first time I ever ate you out happened in this place. So many memories." The smile on his face grows the longer he talks.

I elbow him, grabbing the keys off the counter. We'd taken everything out this morning and dropped it at Thatch's house. The place is just as bare as I found it, though we never really did unpack much.

"We better get going or Ade's going to think we're dead." 

"Hold on I almost forgot something."

I turn to open the door again but he turns me and pulls me back against his chest. He wouldn't be able to do it if I didn't let him and he knows it. He kisses me sweetly. Something kind and soft about it.

"I got it. We can go now."

I shake my head at him but have trouble keeping the smile off my face.  
-  
"This is the dorm," Ade announces, swinging the door open. "Our roommate is out today."

"I call top bunk," Edward shouts, throwing his stuff on top and climbing into it.

The hall is pretty crowded, full of males who really could use deodorant and others who are wearing too much body spray. It's nauseating but no worse than some of the places I've slept before.

Ade closes the door behind us, the sounds outside muffled. I place my bag on the bunk below Edward's, just like old times.

"What's our other roommates name?" I ask, motioning towards the other top bunk.

"It's Philip. He's a nice guy and he isn't around much. He spends a lot of his time in his girlfriends dorm." Ade scoffs at that sitting in his bunk, across from mine. 

There are two desks in the room, one cluttered with books that look like they were dumped on it. The other is bare. 

"The communal showers are down the hall. I hope you have flip flops."

I groan. They wouldn't have been my first choice.

It's been about a week since James's birthday. Enrollment was quick because of it being such a small school. I've heard they've been at the threat of having to close down if they don't get more students to attend. 

It's still a charming school. Most of the buildings are older, built with brick and in an older style. The newest building on campus is fifty five years old.

"I never thought I'd go to college," I say quietly to myself but Ade and Edward both want to make it a discussion. 

"Why? You're one of the smartest people I know," Edward asks.

"I didn't think I'd have money to is all." Though it's a bit more than that. I always thought I'd find a greater purpose. Something to believe in. But I haven't yet and I need to find a way to be content in what I'm doing. "I also had problems in high school with trying to work at the same time and I almost didn't graduate because of it."

"I'm sorry about that, James," Ade says quietly.

"Nows not the time to be sorry." Edward stands and brushes a piece of fuzz off the outside of his tank top, which he is lucky it doesn't get cold around here, and walks to the door. "Classes start back up after Christmas and we should make the most of the time we have. I'm thinking we go find the others and get trashed." 

"I'll text Hornigold and have him grab Thatch," Ade says with a smile, pulling out his phone.

When he looks down, Edward winks at me. I feign a glare but decide to let it go and hope Ade didn't see, pulling out my phone. "I've got Anne and Rackham." 

-Are you up for a few drinks tonight with us?-

-I would but Jack is passed out drunk already-

-You're not his keeper Anne. I haven't seen you in days-

-Alright fine I'll go. I'll take Jack's car and pick you up at your dorm. I wanna see you guys before you get alcohol in your hands just in case Edward is feeling testy again and wants another drinking contest-

-great. I'll meet you outside the building and I'll take you up to the room-

-k-

"Anne will be here in about ten minutes to drive us," I announce.

"Good. Hornigold is leaving his house for the bar now. He says he doesn't mind if we're late," Ade adds.

"Do either of you have any plans for Christmas?" Edward asks. I shake my head as Ade answers with a no. "We'll have to change that or plan something because I'm not going back to my parents."

"Then we'll all get together again. Thatch and Hornigold are leaving the day after and we might as well spend that last day together," Ade says with a light smile to mask the heavy tones of his voice. I know Ade didn't know his parents. He's been mostly alone his entire life and I think he's afraid that will happen again.

"Sounds like a plan," I chime in. I stand and walk to the door, nudging Edward away from it. "I might as well head down and have a smoke before Anne gets here."

"Jim," Edward says, warning me. "You need to kick that habit."

"Are you my mum now too?" I ask playfully but my voice still sounds irritated. 

"Yes," he says with a large smile. "Hand them over." He holds his hand out to me, expectantly. 

"Come on, mate. I haven't smoked in three days. I could take it or leave it," I bargain.

"No, Kidd." He takes on a serious look. His eyes plead with me to stop. "I can't let you continue to kill yourself and you can't blame me for worrying."

I sigh and reach into the pocket of my leather jacket, grabbing that damned box and handing it to Edward. 

"You're an asshole," I groan, walking out the door.

"If not wanting you to die makes me an asshole then I must be the biggest asshole alive."

I shut the door behind me and walk through the clusters of people who all brought too much stuff from home. I hate when he does shit like that. He needs to stop worrying about me, especially in front of Ade. It's annoying as all hell. I would have thought he'd-

I walk into a woman on the stairs. She starts falling back, panic flashing across her face. I grab her arm and pull her to my chest, letting her catch her balance against me. She looks up at me, standing intimately close from the stair below. "Thanks," she says sheepishly. "You know, for not letting me fall." She looks down and sees how close we are, her face turning blood red.

"You're welcome." I step off to the side. "It was my fault anyway."

"Wait," she says as I start to walk down. "I live on the floor below and I was coming up to find someone to help me carry a box of weights. Could you help me?"

"Sure."

"Thank you so much. I don't even know why my dad wanted me to take them with me." 

She leads me down the stairs and out the side door to a small car that's no older than two years. She pops the trunk and makes an attempt to tug the box closer to the edge but struggles. "I should have actually used the weights before I attempted to carry them all at once," she jokes. "Are you sure you won't hurt yourself?" She sounds awkward and almost frightened. She is young, looking like she just graduated from high school and I'm supposed to be a twenty four year old guy. I don't blame her.

"I've taken on more challenging things than boxes. Besides, I can't leave you to do this on your own especially after I almost knocked you down the stairs."

She smiles something bright, her cheeks reddening again. "Follow me," she says as I get my hands under the box and lift it up. It's really damn heavy and that's only made worse by how awkward it is to hold. 

I follow her back through the side door and down the hall, to her dorm. "Just sit it on the desk. Again, thank you so much." I place it lightly on the desk, fighting the urge just to drop it. "I expect to see you around so I might as well get your name."

Her roommates eyes are wide, apparently surprised by my presence in their room. She sits in the far corner on her bed. 

"It's James."

"I'm Erian."

"It was nice meeting you. See you around." 

I walk back out into the hall to meet Anne. I hear a light screech from a voice I haven't heard before, presumably her roommate. "Oh my god he's hot."

"I know," Erian, squeals back.

I laugh under my breath and walk back outside. Anne sits on the hood of her car, smiling at me. "Helping pretty girls now?" she teases. 

"I almost knocked her down the stairs. It was the least I could do. I was coming down to have a smoke before you got here anyway but Kenway thinks he's my mum and now says I'm not allowed to."

"He's making you quit, is he? Good on him." 

I roll my eyes at her. "It's none of his business what I do."

"I don't like you doing it either. It might not be our business but we care about you, Mary."

"I know," I sigh. "Let's go up and get the other two."

"Alright. And just so you know if you need a place where you and Edward can, you know, you're welcome to the back seat. Just come see me for the keys." 

"Anne," I groan. "You don't have to worry that won't be happening tonight. You weren't even supposed to know."

"How could I not. You two are eye fucking all the time."

"What? No." 

"Don't 'no' me. How's the sex?"

"Fucking hell, Anne."

"Come on you've gotta tell me. I think everyone has noticed the both of you limping every now and then."

"I can't believe we're talking about this. Well he definitely knows what he's doing."

"Have you tied him down yet?" she asks, deviously. 

"I'm not going into detail with you."

"I was wondering what those red marks around his wrists four days ago were from."

"Anne," I warn.

"What?" she asks innocently. "I also believe I know what caused his limp."

"Can you blame me? He has such a nice arse."

"He does."

"Now enough of this. The first time was a mistake and all we keep doing is making mistakes."

She places a steady hand on my shoulder. "It's not a mistake that you've found each other. Don't feel bad about enjoying yourselves."

"I don't want to hurt him," I sigh.

"You love him." She says it so calmly. Like a matter of fact. Those words have haunted me for a long time now.

"I don't love him. I never have, Anne, and I never will. We don't have feelings for one another past him being one of my closest friends. Let's leave it at that."

"I'm sorry. Just don't close him out, love. He cares deeply for you."

"That's the problem," I groan.

She laughs and takes my hand in hers pulling me inside and up the stairs. "I wanna see your new room so I can come over when I please." She doesn't let my hand go as we walk through the hall. Some of the guys stop where they are and watch her walk by, all too scared to say anything to her and that fear heightened by her hand being grasped in mine.

She's beautiful. That's something no one can deny. She's wearing a pair of floral print leggings that show off her toned legs. A black tank top and a thin white sweater with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows covers her top half. There is something commanding about her walk, like she has no time for anyone and frankly it's hot.

I lead her to the dorm and push open the slightly ajar door. Edward smirks at me as I walk in. I shoot him a dark glare. "Kidd met a girl," Anne teases.

"Jaysus, Anne," I sigh.

"Getting in good with the ladies already?" Ade says with a look of pure jest.

"Oh, you are?" Edward asks and if I didn't know better I'd think he'd sound jealous.

"Fuck you guys," I laugh. "I almost knocked a girl down the stairs so I helped her carry some stuff to her room."

"She likes him though. I caught her staring at his ass as he picked up that box." Anne attempts to hold in her laughter.

"What can I say," I shrug helplessly. "All I did was help her carry some shite and you arseholes are blowing it out of proportion."

"You look a tad jealous, Edward," Ade teases. "You haven't said a thing."

Edward perks up like a golden retriever. I mentally scold myself for not making that connection before now. "Jealous? You mean of Kidd right?" he asks nervously.

"What else would I mean?" Ade asks, his look skeptical.

"Never mind. Let's go get drunk." Edward walks past Anne, snatching the keys out of her hand. 

"You are not driving my car you reckless bastard," Anne says following him. 

I don't look back at Ade, only taking a glance to see his questioning look. Edward has just successfully tipped Ade off to something. This is fucking great.

I follow them down the hall, Edward twirling the keys around his index finger, teasing Anne all the way to the parking lot. She hip checks him and snatches the keys out of his hands as he stumbles. "Ass," she curses with a smile.

Ade gets in the front with Anne leaving me to sit in the back with Edward. Anne starts the car and pulls out of the parking lot. "Seriously?" he feigns a whine. "You're making me sit by James."

"If you don't shut up I will-"

"Can you two stop bickering while I'm driving," Anne scolds. It sounds awfully like something a mother would say to her kids and I think Edward gets the same idea.

"Muuuuuum," Edward whines, sounding like a child, smirk present on his face. "James is sitting too close to me. Make him stop."

"No I'm not," I feign a pout. "He won't stop looking at me and his face hurts my eyes. Daaaaad." I turn to Ade. "Make him stop."

"I'm never having kids," Anne sighs laughing under her breath.

"Mum? You don't love us?" Edward looks like he's about to burst into laughter as he puffs out his bottom lip.

"Dad is my favorite," I add.

"I don't like being 'dad'," Ade says through his laughter.

"Yeah, dad is so cool. I love you dad." Edward wraps his arms around Ade's seat and places his hands on his chest. "Hey, dad. Why don't you have boobs like mum?"

"Where do babies come from?" I whisper, innocently. 

"I'll tell you." Edward leans close to me acting like he's going to whisper but talking loud enough for the others to hear. "Dad has to put his thing in mum's thing."

"What thing?" 

"You know the-"

"Shut your god damned gobs," Anne shouts, her face just as dark red as her hair. Helpless laughter escaping her.

Ade buries his head in his hands, stifling his embarrassed laughter.

Edward and I bust into a fit, loosing it. We've succeeded in embarrassing them by acting like children and there's nothing better than getting back at Anne for picking on me.

"You owe me a drink," Anne says with an unmaskable smile.

"Fair enough," I say with a pleasant sigh.

"This has got me thinking," Edward states, addressing Ade. "You remember, the day before we enlisted, what you said in that bar." He smiles like a cat who has caught a mouse.

"Keep your mouth shut." Ade turns around to glare at him.

"I didn't forget," he teases.

"Kidd, keep his mouth shut for me." Ade gives me a pleading look in between his harsh glares at Edward.

I place my palm over his mouth, giving Ade a nod and he turns around trying to act like nothing happened. Edward places a light kiss to my palm, batting his eyelashes at me. 

He looks towards the front seat and when he sees no one looking he pulls me into the middle seat. He leans over to my ear to whisper what this thing is about. "Ade once said he liked redheads and the first time he met Anne he crushed on her so bad. I'm not letting him forget it."

I move back into my seat, smiling at the back of Ade's head. He turns around to see my smile and groans. "Why did you tell him?" 

Edward doesn't respond, just flashes a grin. 

"I'd like to know what this is about," Anne says.

"You'll find out eventually," I say passively. 

She raises an eyebrow at me through the reflection of the rear view mirror and I just shrug.

"Finally," she says aloud as she pulls over into the parking lot of the bar. "Now get out."

We file outside into the brisk wind and walk through the front doors. Thatch and Hornigold have already found a table to occupy.

We each grab a chair, taking our seats around their table. I sit my chair backwards and straddle it like usual, Edward taking his place to my right and Anne to my left.

"I'll be damned," Hornigold says. "You took so long we were thinking you'd ditched us."

"We could have gotten here faster but these two," Anne, motions towards Edward and I, "are fucking bastards."

"In our defense, you were asking for it," Edward says behind a shitty smirk. 

"I don't even wanna know," Thatch mutters into his mug. "Now where's that drunken boyfriend of yours?" 

Anne doesn't take too kindly to his wording. "He's passed out at home. Thought I'd have more fun without him." I wish she wouldn't make excuses for him.

"Seems we're all here alone, again," Hornigold sighs.

Edward brushes his hand against my thigh as a reminder that he's here. Something about him is possessive. He wants things to only be his and his way but that never works as I'm just as stubborn. 

"Kidd has already been talking to the women in our dorm and we just moved in," Edward scoffs with a smirk ever present. 

I groan and put my head down on the cool table. 

"Good on you, Kidd," Thatch says boisterously. 

"How do you manage that when you look barely eighteen?" Hornigold questions.

"Are you all so ready for me to get hitched and run off?" I ask, sitting back up. "Each of you, except Hornigold, asked me to stay."

"Wait, you were leaving?" Hornigold asks, intrigued.

"I was. I will again but I was planning on leaving right after we were discharged."

"Yes it is so horrible that you found people who care for you," Anne says sarcastically.

A short petite woman walks up to the table, a waitress. "Can I get you guys and lady something?"

"Six rum and cokes," Thatch says. "On me."

"I'll bring that right to you," she says with a smile and heads off.

"Maybe I could get a job here," Anne says absentmindedly. "It's a nice place."

"You could," Ade says aloud.

"I'll probably come by tomorrow and see if they have an opening."

"What are you guys doing for Christmas?" Edward asks.

Everyone just sort of shrugs, shaking their heads and waiting for another to speak up. "I could have you guys over if you bring food," Anne offers. "The house is definitely big enough."

"We could have a white elephant," Thatch says happily.

"What the fuck is a white elephant?" I question.

"Jeez, Kidd, do you always have to be such a foreigner?" Edward teases, feigning irritation.

"Shut your mouth Welshman." 

"Everyone buys a gift, it could be a gag gift or something no one would want or an honestly good gift. Then we all pick numbers at random that go with each box and you open the one you get. If you don't want it you can trade with someone who already opened theirs," Ade, thankfully, explains.

"Sounds fun."

The waitress comes over with a tray of drinks and sits them on the table. "If you need anything else, wave me over," she says sweetly, taking her empty tray with her.

We don't waste much time downing our drinks before we get another. The conversations seem to take a fun turn. "What is your ideal woman like, Thatch?" Hornigold asks.

"I'd have to say a ship with a large hull that slices through the water. She'd be a beauty," Thatch says, looking distantly. 

We all laugh a bit but don't comment further. Thatch's love really is to the sea.

"And you Ade?" Hornigold continues.

"Yeah Ade," Edward says wrapping his arm around his shoulders. "What do you like in women?"

He shakes Edward off, shooting him a glare. "I like smart women. Women who can hold their own."

"Didn't you say something-" I grab his drink and drain it, forcing him to abruptly stop. I'm not going to let him embarrass Ade unless he wants me to embarrass him. "Arsehole," he grumbles but takes the hint and keeps his mouth shut.

"Your turn Kenway," Thatch cheers.

"Personally I like women who challenge me." He lounges back in his chair, comfortable with his words.

"I'm guessing yours line up with the lass you already have?" Hornigold says to me.

"I don't really have a preference," I shrug. "I've met a lot of good people in my time."

"What about you Anne? Any preference in women?" Hornigold asks, looking kinda smug.

"I've only been with one woman in my life," Anne starts, everyone but me and Edward looking a little scandalized. "and she was of a rougher type. Really bold, sure of herself, and wise. Not to mention her beauty." Anne says this all with a smile, eyes bright. She won't look at me but I know she means for me to take the words to heart. 

"Wow," Thatch says, stunned. "Why did you ever let go of a woman like that?"

"Her heart lies elsewhere. Even if she says it has nothing to do with her heart." 

"Damn," mutters, Hornigold.

"Don't be sad. I got Kidd afterward," she says with a sly smile.

"Damn it, Annie." I curse as Thatch let's out a wolf whistle.

"Wow, you two? I suspected some tension but... when did this happen?" Hornigold asks.

"On the beginning of the last voyage." 

"I can't wrap my head around that," he continues. "James and Anne."

Edward shifts uncomfortably and I get the feeling he'll do something stupid. 

"But that was months ago and Anne and Rackham are together again." I interject before Edward can. "We're better as friends."

"Exactly," Anne agrees.

I pat Edwards knee, giving it a reassuring squeeze. If he says anything I'll kill him. He shouldn't want the validation because there is nothing to validate. We aren't together.

"Kenway, did you know about this?" Ade asks.

"I learned right after we docked but I had assumed before then," he says smugly. "The amount of times they'd sneak away together was evidence enough."

"If Kidd was sneaking away with anyone I would have thought it you, Edward," Thatch laughs.

"Don't make me puke." I put on a disgusted look.

"Jaysus, Thatch," Edward mutters, the others erupting in laughter.

Anne places a hand on my shoulder, no doubt laughing about the irony of the situation.

"I'm just fucking with the two of you," he continues. "Your reactions are priceless."

"I don't say anything about you and Ben spending so much time together." I sit back with a smirk, raising an eyebrow in challenge.

He is unable to hold back his laughter, placing a hand on a very uncomfortable Ben's shoulder. "That's hilarious."

"Come on," Anne jokes. "You'd be an adorable couple."

This only furthers his laughter.

"You're insane," Ben states awkwardly, "if you think I would..."

"It's just in jest Ben," Edward eases him. "We know your sexuality is... fragile."

"If I wasn't as drunk as I am I'd probably be upset with you," Ben states.

"I gotta take a piss," I mutter, standing and walking to the back.

"Men," Anne sighs. "Always have to announce their business."

I enter the empty room and wait. It's only a minute later when I see our rugged blond step through the door. He sees me right away, smirk widening on his face as he paces closer to me, standing against my chest.

He kisses me lightly, it's just an innocent peck before grabbing my wrist and pulling me into one of the stalls. The does the latch, turning back to me.

We kiss like teenagers, all teeth and tongue and I have no doubts about what he wants. His hands travel down my sides and around my hips. His right hand pulls at my waist band. I grab his hand, stopping him and he gives me a questioning look.

"What's wrong?" he asks, a look of worry casted over him as he goes back to my neck.

"I'm on my period," I whisper. 

"Are you feeling alright?" He stands straight but doesn't move back, the hard press of him against me.

"It's my period not the Black Plague."

He buries his face in my neck, breathing in deeply. "I heard that getting off helps with cramps. If you feel it in the next few days just tell me." He cups his hand around my mound, pressing his fingers upward, the cloth rubbing sweetly.

"We have to go or they're going to think something is wrong," I say urgently.

"Fine you go back and stop at the bar. Make up some story for me."

"I'll leave first and you can come afterwards. Now how are you going to hide this?" I place my hand against his crotch, his head falling back at the slightest touch.

"It definitely won't go down if you keep your hand on it." He smirks. "Give me a sec and I'll see if I can get it down." He turns and faces the stall door putting his head against its surface.

I give him a moment to sort himself out.

He turns around to me and grabs my shoulders. "I can't do it when you're in here."

"Hold on. I wanted to talk to you."

"And it's gone," he sighs.

"I know you're... jealous," I have to force the word out, still denying to myself that he could have any feelings as such. "Just don't do anything that could get us caught." I keep my face expressionless, hiding my urge to snap at him for making this real at all.

"I won't do anything, Kidd," he defends. "And I'm not jealous. I just wish... never mind that's not important. What is, is that we go have a good time."

"I'll see you in a bit." I run my fingertips over the top of his waist band as I pass him and leave the stall.

"You fucking tease."

I leave the toilets and swing by the bar for another rum and coke. I take it back to my seat, ignoring the questioning looks of my comrades.

Ben, Thatch, and Ade continue their conversation, whatever it may be about, letting Anne talk to me. "Where's lover boy? That definitely wasn't long enough for-"

"I just wanted to talk to him and I knew I couldn't do it here," I whisper.

"I knew he was the jealous type," Anne laughs to herself. "You can tell he doesn't like the talks of you being with others."

"Not my problem." I take a drink out of my glass, hating how openly she speaks of it.

"It's your pants he's in."

"You're going to be the reason he never gets back in them."

"That man would kill me," she jokes.

I start listening to Thatch, Hornigold, and Ade's conversation. They aren't talking about much, just some weird television show Thatch had watched. Edward slides back into his chair, doing a good job at forgetting our 'talk'. 

"-it reminds me of our bunks aboard the ship but this time Kidd and Kenway aren't sleeping in the same bed." I hear the last of Ade's sentence, snapping my head toward them.

"Oi," Edward interjects. "The lass had to have her own bed."

"That doesn't make it any less funny," Thatch belts out. "I remember the both of you arguing early in the morning cause Kenway was holding you."

I'm shocked he knew that but keep that hidden, looking unfazed. 

That was one of the first times I had to think about him in a nature other than that of another comrade or another soldier. It made me look past the lines I was supposed to. He held me against him on that second night, my thigh brushing against him. We both knew it was wrong but we continued until it escalated to where it is now and there is no going back, only the heavy road forward.

"I don't like being touched," I say simply.

Edward thought I was another man and that didn't stop his foolish feelings. He wanted to hold me. 

"Yeah, Edward, he doesn't like being touched," Anne says, sounding at bit tipsy as she worms her way into my lap. I like the primal look that Edward gets in his sea blue eyes. 

I tip back the rest of my drink, ignoring him as he attempts to brush it off as nothing.  
-  
Edward and I lay side by side in my small bed, staring up at the wooden slats of his bunk. Ade didn't come up with us, staying behind at the bar when we stumbled out to the street to take a taxi back and took his only key with us.

My thoughts are scrambled, every idea sounds like a good idea at times like this. 

Edwards blond hair is splayed out around his head, the tie he uses to keep it in a neat ponytail, in a place where he'll never find it again. He keeps glancing at me and smiling to himself like he knows something I don't.

"What is love?" Edward asks, his face falling flat as he stares dead ahead.

"I don't know," I mumble, upset at the disruption of silence. I'd rather muse silently to myself than talk. 

He stays silent for a spell, mulling over his drunken thoughts. "I love you," he giggles like a middle schooler talking to their first crush. 

"I love you too," I say absentmindedly, liking how it sounds out of my mouth. 

He grabs my hand and holds it innocently playing with my fingers like he doesn't understand how they can bend the way they do. The soft brush of his calloused fingers tickles my palm, making me smile.

How can I love someone if I don't know what love is?  
-  
"What happened last night?" Edward asks, rubbing his head and squinting his eyes against the blinding light that streams through the plain glass window. 

"No fucking idea," I groan. There's no sign of Ade anywhere.

I stand, stepping over Edward who must have gotten kicked off my bed in the middle of the night and walk to the door. I open it, glancing into the nearly empty hall, empty except for a very hungover Ade sleeping beside the door. 

I turn back to Edward who continues to groan in pain. My head is pounding. The pain something similar to the feeling of getting hit in the head over and over. We really need to learn to drink without getting drunk.


	14. Christmas

I walk through the front door of Anne and Rackham's house, food in hand. It's a really nice place which is surprising to me because Jack lives here.

"Goddamn it!" Anne curses as I walk into the living room where all our friends sit. 

"You lucky fucking bastards!" Thatch laughs.

That's when I glance up to the doorframe and see mistletoe, hanging proudly from the door casing, jumping out from beneath it.

"I got Thatch and Hornigold," Anne laughs. "There looks of disgust made it worth it."

"It wasn't fucking worth it!" Hornigold yells.

Ade comes in behind me, everyone expecting Edward to be in tow but he doesn't step through.

"Where's Kenway?" I ask.

"He found a packet of cigarettes back in the dorm and now he's outside lighting the box on fire." Ade sounds pretty amused by it all.

"That fucker," I curse under my breath.

He walks inside, all three of our poorly wrapped boxes in hand. "Merry Christmas!" he cheers, as Ade takes the boxes the sit them in the pile with the others. "I'm sorry about your trash can. There's kind of a fire in it."

"Watch out for all the mistletoe." Hornigold warns. "Anne means business."

"Of fuck," Edward curses, moving out from under the green leaves that hang above the door.

"You lot got lucky," Anne laughs. "Just put the food in the dining room."

I stop outside the doorframe looking at Edward. "You go first."

He nods walking through first, neck cranked up at the ceiling. 

"You were right," he laughs, spotting more mistletoe. He sits the pot he took from me with the other dishes, pulling off the foil and wadding it up. I sit mine down beside it, avoiding standing too close to Edward or the door. 

We enter the living room separately, smiling at Anne's sour look. "I will get all of you before the night is out."

"Good luck," Edward challenges.

"You too James. Even if it's the last thing I do."

"If one of you even try," I warn.  
-  
We all take seats at the table, no one wasting time as they dig into anything they can find.

I watch as Anne stands innocently, walking to the light switch and turning on the rotating ceiling fan. She leaves it on for a few second, long enough for it to spin quickly and something to fall off the edge, hanging. No one but me pays attention.

"Anne, can I talk to you? Privately." 

She smiles widely, taking my hand and dragging me back through the living room. "Don't follow unless you want to see Kidd naked."

"Damn it, Annie," I curse, an echo of laughter bleeding out from the dining room that then becomes muffled when she shuts the door. "Have the others asked about Kenway and I's... relationship?" I don't like my phrasing. We're not in a relationship but that's the only word I can use to imply how we sleep together.

"I'm pretty sure Thatch thinks the two of you are gay but it doesn't bother him much. Hornigold is oblivious to everything. He probably thinks we did come back here to fuck," she laughs. "Ade is smart though and with the three of you living so close to one another, he's bound to find out something."

"That's what I'm afraid of."

"They'll all see it when I get you two to kiss." She smiles like a devil. "How natural it will be for the two of you to just press-"

"Anne," I warn.

She laughs laying back into her plush bed. "You're going to hide this for the rest of your life's?" she asks.

"No, Kenway will start dating and he'll move on. Probably get himself a wife and she'll pop out a few babes and life will be good," I say truthfully, there is no need in arguing over an outcome that is evident.

"And you're okay with that?" Anne looks confused by it.

"I couldn't care less what Kenway does," I sigh.

"But what about you?"

"I've gotta find my way in the world and having him dragging me down won't help."

"Whatever you say James." She grabs my hand and pulls me back out into the hall and to the dining room. I attempt to stop before the door casing but she pulls me through to stand beside her under that damned plant. 

Anne puts her hands on my shoulder and stands on her tip toes, ready to kiss me when I am. Out of habit, I put my hands on her waist and lift her up to give her a quick peck.

I sit her back down, as the others whistle like something exciting happened, and glance up to the ceiling fan to see the mistletoe now hanging from one of the blades right over Ade and Hornigold's heads.

"Look up," I say slyly, taking my seat beside Kenway.

Everyone's eyes drag up slowly, cautiously, like if they go slow enough maybe it'll disappear.

As soon as Hornigold gets it in his sights he puts his head down on the table, groaning. "I'm not doing it again," he whines.

Ade pushes his chair back and bolts up, moving to the far side of the room just shaking his head in protest.

"I had to kiss Anne," I argue. "You two aren't getting out of it."

"Actually," Edward interjects. "If that thing was on the ceiling fan then we all have to kiss the people sitting next to us."

"Damn you Kenway," a drunken Rackham grumbles, glancing at Thatch beside him.

Anne sits beside Rackham and me, giggling, glancing to Edward and I both. Fucking hell, Kenway's doing this on purpose. "I'll start," Anne says turning to Rackham and placing a quick kiss on him, he turns and bumps the corner of his mouth with Thatch, then Thatch to Hornigold who has slunk back further into his seat. 

"This is idiotic," Hornigold seems to scold all of us before quickly kissing Ade who cringes a bit, probably wishing he never sat back down.

Ade presses his pursed lips to Edward's, neither of them too pleased at the situation.

Kenway then turns to me, his lips not moving but I can see the smile in his eyes. He purses his lips and presses them to mine quickly, mimicking the actions of the others. 

I turn to Anne and give her a quick peck like I did just moments ago and I now know Anne enjoys torturing me as such.

We all go back to our plates, Thatch sinking his teeth into a turkey leg, turning his head to the side to pull it apart with his teeth. Hornigold laughs at Thatch, though he has no more manners than the former man does. 

Ade just seems amused by the whole situation, all of us unlikely friends, together, trying to be normal people.

I look at Edward, his stupidly handsome face looking seemingly innocent from the side as he eats a spoonful of mashed potatoes but I can see the wheels turning in head and something sly in his eyes.

Rackham looks at me with the glossed over eyes of a raging alcoholic. "It's Christmas Kidd and you don't even have your lass over?"

All attention seems to turn on me, some waiting to hear my reasoning, overs waiting for the excuse I'll make up.

"We had a spat and we spilt, knew it wasn't going to work out. I'm not a man to be held down." I flash them a smirk, the lie coming as easy as breathing.

"You at least got with her once in all that time you were together?" Kenway asks slyly.

"That's my business," I snap, sending him a warning glare.

"Little bastard," Thatch laughs, taking it as a yes.

"Takes one to know one," I say with a flinty smile.

Thatch laughs heartily, and high fives me from across the table. "Lad, after my own heart." Thatch would have been a great father. I don't know why that comes to mind other than he has a fatherly demeanor to him. "There's no shame in being a bastard," Thatch shrugged. 

"Did you know your father, Thatch?" Anne asks, curious.

"No but I had a lovely mother to fill his place, though she passed some years ago to a disease I don't know the name of. It was an easy death, went in her sleep."

"I'm sorry, Thatch," Anne says softly, comforting him though he doesn't seemed pained by it, having already come to terms with everything and moved on. We always do.

"What about you, Annie?" He asks. "Your parents?"

She rolls her eyes huffing. "My father was cheating on his wife with my mother and when I was born he couldn't keep it a secret any longer so they divorced and he married my mum. We're not on speaking terms after I left for the Navy, ignoring their yapping about my 'well being'. I'm better off now too. They'd probably tell me that the company I keep isn't worth its salt and that's where they'd be mistaken."

"I'd drink to that," Hornigold smiles, taking a sip of his wine. "My parents are still together happily married but I haven't talked much with them as the years went by. What of you Ade?"

"I was orphaned, though you can't miss what you've never had. I got a nice foster family who raised me the best they could and I haven't thought to bother them." He seems unbothered by it but I know it eats at him.

"You wouldn't be bothering them, Ade. They'd be proud to see the man you've become," I say truthfully. I'd personally like to rub it in the face of that degrading woman at the orphanage I was at from my first year of life to my cousins death, that I've made it this far. "If you even think about your foster parents that's a sign they'd probably like to speak with you too."

"You seem to know some about foster parents," Ade says carefully as if not to spook me like a wild horse. "What about your parents, Kidd?"

"I'm a bastard in the truest sense," I shrug.

"And your mum-" Rackham starts and I feel a faint pang of guilt.

"Don't Jack," Edward says softly, cutting him off. He remembers our screaming match, the one that lead to me leaving and getting stabbed. "He won't even tell me."

Anne places a hand on my back and rubs it.

"Nothing to whine and groan over. I wouldn't be here if not for how things went and that'd be a bloody shame if I didn't know you lot." I smile, truthfully.

"Fuck having families," Thatch says loudly. "This is the only family we need."

Kenway pats my back roughly as the others smile and get a bit loud with their cheers of agreement. I smile, masking my sadness. They care about me and all I want to do is leave them.  
-  
"Everyone draw a number," Anne cheers, bowl full of strips of paper in one hand and a glass of whisky in the other, grasped in her small fingers. 

Kenway and I sit in bean bags by a small, heavily decorated Christmas tree, across from the couch that houses Thatch, Hornigold, and Ade, respectively. Anne and Rackham lay on a blow up mattress completing our oblong circle around the gifts.

Some look lopsided, wrapped in wrapping paper and others are just unidentifiable shapes with news paper crumpled around it and tape haphazardly thrown on.

The metal bowl is passed around as we draw out papers waiting to look at them until the last one is taken by Rackham.

"Whoever got the seven is one lucky son of a bitch," Thatch laughs. "I got two."

"I'm five," Hornigold announces.

I look down to the small scrap of paper in hands and gently unfold it hiding my expression from the others as I see a 7 scribbled in Anne's flowy handwriting.

"I'm four," Edward announces.

Rackham's eyebrows draw together in frustration. "A damned one."

"It still confuses me how a one like you got a ten like Anne," Edward scoffs, causing laughter to flow through the room.

"You're one to talk, Eddy," Anne teases. "I'm three."

"I got the six," Ade exclaims.

The others turn to me rolling their eyes, knowing I'm the one who got the seven and will have my choice over all the gifts.

"You're the luckiest man alive," Ade laughs lightheartedly, taking a sip of his liquor. 

Rackham looks over the pile of presents appraising them. He grabs the smallest on the stack, just a small box and Hornigold smiles. "I'd hoped you'd pick that one."

Jack pulls open the wrapping paper and reads the from of the box. "Beer scented soap?"

"You smell like it all the time any way," Hornigold chides with a small pleased smile. "And you should bathe more."

Rackham, glares at Hornigold but seems to take the joke in stride.

Thatch looks over the pile, knocking back his glass, as we begin chanting "thatch!" over and over in anticipation.

He grabs a box that's wadded up in newspaper; Kenway's box. I can only imagine what he'd have picked out and in a way I don't really want to. Though that doesn't stop Thatch from tearing it open greedily to find what lies underneath.

Kenway is laughing silently to himself, an undeniable smile turned up.

Thatch pulls out what looks like a pillow, shaped like half the torso of a man with an arm hanging off the side like you would lay on someone's chest. He looks at the tag, squinting to read the small lettering. "Boyfriend pillow?" 

We burst into laughter. I roll onto my side, my knife holster digging into me as I hold my stomach that is way too full to be comfortable. 

Thatch wraps the arm around his neck and leans heavily on its side. "At least it's comfortable."

He laughs with us, all a bit tipsy and lighthearted.

"If I get a sex toy I will shove it up each of your arses," Anne laughs, giving us all a mental image we didn't want.

She grabs a gift without any predetermination and pulls off the newspaper, finding a box with holes in it and a scratching sound emitting from within. The box shifts in her hands, what's inside, moving.

She opens the box carefully, worry etched into her. As soon as the box is opened a reddish rodent goes scampering across the floor into the dining room. "Who the fuck bought that!" Anne says through her laughter.

"I didn't know-" Rackham starts and she flicks his ear.

"I don't want a pet and you didn't even think to tell me which one was yours!" 

"I'll get it," Edward says walking to the table, kneeling down to the frightened animal underneath. He reaches out to it, grabbing it's paw. It screeches, clawing at him, leaving scratches that aren't soon to go away.

"Fucking piece of shite, rat," he curses, pulling his hand back. "Tell me you bought it and didn't just find it."

"I bought it," Rackham, defends. "It's got all its shots."

"It's a ferret. Move Kenway," I say standing on the other side of the doorway, waiting for him to pass through. I walk in after he's gone and kneel down much like he did before. I click my tongue softly, holding out my hand waiting for it to decide. 

You learn a few things about rodents when you run away from 'home' and sleep on the streets. One, if the rodents don't like you, you'll wake up with one less ear. And two, never leave a trace of food around you.

It moves toward me slowly, walking into my palm and nuzzling against my sleeve. I pull it to my chest and it latches onto my shirt.

"Kidd's a rat whisperer," Hornigold scoffs. 

I walk to Anne trying to hand it to her but it stays latched on, it's nails piercing through my shirt fabric.

"You know what, James. Keep it. I have no room for a pet and it seems to like you." She motions for me to sit.

"Anne I'm no good with pets," I argue.

"You seem to be. Makes me wonder what else your good with." I know what she hinting at and I don't appreciate it very much.

"That means you get whatever I open."

Edward grabs a bag that looks like it's been put through the ringer, tattered and ripped in places. He pulls out the tissue paper that has been stuffed inside and smirks, looking inside. He pulls out a flask, stainless steel, a nice thing. 

"I decided I need to lay off drinking," Thatch says with a bitter smile. "Thought one of you could have it."

"Good on you, Thatch," Edward commends warmly. 

"That doesn't mean I won't still drink." He takes a drink from his glass to get his point across. "Just not all the time." He playfully hits Hornigold's shoulder. "It's your turn."

Ben grabs my box and I almost feel bad for the man... almost. He pulls the newspaper off and is met with the ugliest green Christmas sweater I could find online. He takes a moment to inspect it and I watch the exact moment he sees what the pattern is. He looks disgusted before turning to show to everyone. "Which one of you picked this out?" he asks, motioning towards the two deer having sex across the front.

"I couldn't let everyone like their gift." I smirk, slyly, petting the ferret that lay across my chest.

"Hey Thatch, this matches your personality better," he says throwing it at him.

"Put it on," Ade laughs.

Thatch pulls it on over his shirt, and looks content in the sweater.

"I forgot," Anne yells, getting up and running to her and Rackham's bedroom. She comes back with an armload of sweaters all largely oversized and the ugliest shades of red and green. "Put one on."

She tosses one to each of us. The ugly red thing I catch has a giant mistletoe on it and I can't help but think it's on purpose.

I slide it on, begrudgingly, the sleeves a full five inches too long and the hem reaching my knees. The sleeves are a little too long for Edward and it makes him look like a six year old as I assume mine does too. I have no idea where Anne got these but she got them with the intention to make us swim in them.

Ade looks over the two boxes left, one is Anne's and the other is his own. He grabs Anne's neatly wrapped box which I'm surprised no one has picked yet and pulls out a black frilly thong, the tag still on it.

"You've got a girlfriend, don't you Ade?" Anne asks innocently. 

I didn't know his face could get so red as he lets out an awkward cough. This coming from a man who is more stoic.

"No and I'm thinking the flask it looking better and better."

"You can use it to hide your shame," Edward laughs and passes him the flask. "It just so happens I know a woman who will look perfect in this."

"Of course." Anne smiles widely, deviously.

I shoot her a glare, only causing her to smile back. 

I grab the last box and open it, no longer worried about what's inside because I know I don't have to take it with me but when I see what's inside I wish I could. I lift up a bottle of Everclear 190. Anne takes it from me, smiling like a little girl waking up to find the presents Santa has brought her.

"Just don't drink it straight," Ade laughs. "It can cause blindness."

"Thank you so much." She stands and hugs him, his face turning that reddish color again. She takes her seat and gives me a pointed look that I can't decipher quick enough.

"Kidd, Kenway, look up just a bit." She laughs and my heart stops for a millisecond before I see Edward turn to me, smirking like a devil. I glance up and see mistletoe hanging off one of the branches on the tree.

Kenway's hand gently grabs my jaw, tilting my head back to his and gives me a quick peck on the lips.

Anne is shaking with excitement, hanging onto Rackham as she almost rolls off the bed. Thatch wolf whistles and Hornigold laughs along with Ade who still manages to look skeptical. 

I sit as far away from Edward as I can without moving my beanbag and glare at the group. "What are you looking at?" I growl crossing my arms.

Kenway is a bloody son of a cur. What the others saw was too sensual. He touched my face, gently brushing his fingers over my jaw. His eyes looked right at mine like he's done it a hundred times before. I fucking hate his guts.

Anne crawls over Rackham, switching places with him to ruffle my hair. 

"When's the wedding," Thatch bellows, his laughter holding true.

"Haha very funny," Edward says dryly, feigning irritation. 

"Kenway, can I talk to you?" I say through gritted teeth.

He nods and leads me to the dining room, Thatch saying something about stealing his pillow back.

He grabs the sleeve of my sweater and pulls me through the doorway with him. "Mistletoe!" Anne yells and watches as I press a kiss to his cheek.

"His mouth Kidd," she teases and I shoot her a glare that could strike her dead.

I kiss him quickly and walk further into the dining room to stay out of ear shot.

"The ceiling fan!" I hear Ade yell.

I kiss him again, wanting to punch him instead, and drag him into the kitchen away from their prying eyes as their conversations pick back up and the ferret crawls up onto my shoulder.

My blood is boiling and he notices too. His hands rest softly on my shoulders, his left avoiding the ferret as his thumbs rub the place right under my collar bones in an attempt to soothe me. "I can't fucking take this," I say lowly, quiet enough so only he can hear.

"We've kissed before, Kidd. How is this different?" He doesn't pose the question like a joke, sounding like his confidence has taken a blow.

"The others aren't supposed to know and you act like you enjoy this way too much for them not to."

"I know we're not together and we probably never will be but even if I didn't know anything about you and this last month or so never happened, I'd still kiss you the same way I do now. Damn, Jim, if you would have kissed me on the ship I'd just shrug it off and kiss you back." His hands go to my lower back and pull me flush against him but I don't humor him, fighting against his hold.

"Back off Kenway." I put my hands on his chest and push him off me, his affection pissing me off.

"Fine," he says, putting his hands up defensively. "You can walk through the land mines first." He motions towards the mistletoe.

I walk back to the living room but his hands go around my waist, stopping me in the doorway. We catch the attention of everyone in the room, their eyes watching closely. 

He dips me back, forcing me to grab the front of his shirt in fear of falling. He smirks down at me, looking right pleased with himself. "Don't you dare-"

His lips plant firmly on mine, kissing me with vigor as his tongue slips into my mouth. 

The others cheer, getting loud and rowdy as usual. I drop myself, collapsing onto my back to get away from him, coughing and spitting excess saliva into a cup on the table, the ferret getting frightened, running off.

I hear Edward take a step towards me and whip around to face him, my fist burying itself in his gut. He catches my weak hand as I recoil and doesn't see my other as it swings at his face, connecting with his jaw.

He has no choice but to fight back, swinging at my face as I duck nimbly out of the way. He dodges my next swing and tackles me to the floor.

I notice Ade stand to attempt to pull us apart but Anne shakes her head. "Give Kidd a minute and he'll cool down."

Edward attempts to pin me down but I rip my hand free and catch him in the shoulder. He places a knee to my stomach and grabs my wrists, pinning me down.

I stop thrashing and glare up at him, noticing his jaw swelling just a bit. "Get off of me," I growl.

He lifts his hands, surrendering. He moves back to his beanbag, holding his face. "I forgot how hard you can hit."

"I'll get ice." Anne grabs my hand and helps me up, walking into the kitchen.

I sit back down by Kenway, glaring at him the whole way over, as I hold my stomach, a bruise no doubt developing. "And I forgot how heavy your fat arse is."

Anne walks back in with an ice pack and hands it to Edward, letting him press it to his face. 

"Did you think you'd get a different reaction?" Ade asks with an amused smile.

"Unless you want Kidd to turn his anger on you I'd drop it," Anne teases. 

The ferret crawls out from under the Christmas tree slowly, looking around before darting at me, slipping under the collar of my shirt. It nestles into my side, enjoying the warmth my skin provides. It's silky soft fur running across my bruise.

"What are you gonna name your rodent?" Thatch asks with an air of teasing, attempting to lighten the air that Edward and I made heavy.

"I don't know. I'll give it some time before I come up with something."

"Where are you going to keep it? You don't have a cage," Ade inquires.

"It'll sleep with me and I'll let it out to do its business. Simple. Speaking of which I think I should take it now and have a smoke."

"No you won't," Edward interjects.

"You're not my mother." I pull one out of my pocket and put it between my teeth just to spite him. I walk to the door, hearing him following me outside, the ferret clinging to my waistband, still tucked under my shirt.

He catches the door that I attempt to slam in his face, closing it behind him. I don't pay him mind, pulling my ferret out and setting it down beside me. It takes a moment to look around before walking a few paces out. 

I pull out my lighter, putting it to the end of the cigarette and take a quick puff. 

"Kidd you've gotta stop this."

"Stop what? Smoking or crushing your game?" 

"Well, ideally, both." He shrugs, laughing awkwardly. "But this is about your smoking." He steps up behind me putting his hand on my shoulder. 

The ferret skitters back over to him bitting at his boots, only stopping when he takes his hand off me. "I should have gotten a ferret a long time ago. He keeps you off me."

"It's a he?" He sounds amused.

"Aye and he'll be the only male in my bed for the time being."

"What is it about him, Kidd," He teases, walking closer. "Is he a better kisser than I am? Does he warm you up at night better than I can?" 

He reaches up quickly to snag the cigarette out of my hand but only meets a face full of smoke that I blow at him.

"You can't distract me, Kenway."

"Kidd you're killing yourself."

"I know but it helps." I look down at the ground, ashamed of myself for having such a disgusting habit. "When I was younger and scared of being found out, I'd smoke. I'd do a few favors for the guy who owned the corner store and he'd give me some, simple as that. They made it a little easier." My tone is heavy, held down by the weight of my regrets.

"You don't have to worry about that now... Mary." He whispers my name to me, all quite like, similar to how a sinning man would pray. "None of us would let anything happen to you."

"Kenway, I wasn't worried for myself back then. It was more complicated than that and it's still a heavy burden to bear." I sigh, finally turning to him. "I'll stop." The cigarette between my fingers is dropped and I stomp out the last of its ashes. "But you shouldn't worry about it."

"Fine but if you ever need anything I'm here. How about this," he smirks, "you kiss me every time you feel you want one."

"This seems to help you more than it helps me." 

"As soon as we find somewhere private, away from the eyes of our mates through that window, I'll give you a kiss and I have a feeling this time you won't pull away from me." He winks and walks back to the house, everyone in the window cowering.

"Cheeky bastard," I call after him and I know he smiles.

My ferret runs up my pant leg, seeking refuge under my sweater. I follow Kenway back in watching as everyone pretends to act natural, like they weren't watching our conversation. 

There was nothing to see really, the most exciting thing was my ferret pissing.

"Kidd just smoked his last cigarette," Edward says proudly, patting my back as we take our seats.

"I'm proud of you," Anne says, sweetly.

"Is Kenway that persuasive?" Thatch teases.

"I don't know, Thatch," Edward shrugs, a smirk tugging at his lips. "I'm more worried about your noses. You know, 'cause it must have hurt pressing them against the window."

They laugh, knowing they're caught.

"I didn't know you lot were so interested in ferret piss or what was it you were looking for?"

No one speaks up and Edward laughs, amused. 

"Well look at the time," Anne says quickly, looking at her wrist for a nonexistent watch. "It's late and you're all too tossed to make it home. I'll go grab blankets." 

She lets herself out, swinging her hips hoping to catch someone's eye.

The ferret pops it head out of the top of my shirt, looking at me with its little black eyes. I pet his head, his soft fur almost velvety in texture. I'm gonna like having him around.

Edward reaches out to pet him, the little guy nipping at his finger, attempting to bite it off weakly. He runs up Edwards arm and nuzzles up against his jaw, using his stubble to scratch him like a scratching post.

"Oh I get it now, the little guy only wants me for my body," Edward says sarcastically.

"How sweet. You're co-parenting," Thatch laughs.

"With two dads he'll be the best at playing catch," Edward jokes, petting his ferret beard.

"You're not funny," I say dryly, holding out my hand so the ferret can skitter across my arm and back into my shirt. "Are you two ready to head to the docks tomorrow afternoon." I look up at Hornigold and Thatch, two people I won't be quick to forget,

"I don't have anywhere else to be," Hornigold almost sounds a bit upset, but tries his hardest to not let us see his disappointment.

"Things happen for a reason, Ben. What's meant to happen will happen." I nod in understanding to Hornigold. There comes a point when you need to change course.

Anne comes back in tossing blankets at us before helping Rackham up and back to their room. "Sleep well," she calls, closing the door behind her.

Hornigold and Thatch both make for the blow up mattress, leaving Ade to have the couch for himself. Ade faces the side of the couch leaving his back to the room, same with Thatch and Hornigold, both of their backs turned to Kenway and I.

Edward slides his beanbag up against mine, pulling me closer to him. "I've missed sleeping by you at night," he whispers, his voice barely audible.

"You'll get used to it," I whisper back just as quietly, his hand playing across my side.

"You look adorable in that sweater." He smirks, lifting my blanket just a bit, eyes trailing down me.

We're lucky people are out on the road tonight, it makes noise just loud enough to drown us out.

"Fuck off, mate." 

He buries his face in my neck, kissing softly. "Merry Christmas," he says on a sigh.

"Merry Christmas."  
-  
I wake up early, no one else in the house awake. Edwards arms are wrapped around my waist, pressing himself tight against me. A more... personal part of him, poking at the back of my thighs. 

It happens more times than I'd like.

He stirs awake as I shift away from him, his yawning in my ear sends chills down my spine.

"Morning," he mumbles.

I roll out of his arms, not listening to his groans of protest. I sit up, feeling a tightness in my chest. My breathing is labored, hard to inhale. 

"Are you okay?" Edward asks, sitting up quickly. 

"I slept in my binder." I take a full breath, as full as I can, and cough. The liquid that had settled in my lungs being forced to move.

"What does that mean? How can I help?" He looks alarmed, reaching out to hold me as that's the only thing he knows to do.

"I just need to get it off."

The others start to stir awake so we stop talking. I walk down the hall to Anne bathroom, shutting the door, leaving Edward to stand on the other side.

I take off the sweater and my shirt before pulling the binder over my head. I breath deeply, filling my lungs fully and exhaling, forcing myself to cough. 

My chest hurts from being compressed that long. My breast ache and I can see the lines from the stitching pressed into my skin, a dark red color.

Edward knocks, whispering, "Kidd? You okay?"

I put back on my shirt and open the door letting him inside. He shuts it behind him looking at my chest, that is no longer bound, for more reason that one I think.

"Don't worry, Kenway every-"

He kisses me pulling me to his chest, slipping his tongue between my lips, his worry hitting me in waves. He pulls back looking at me, with his brow furrowed. "Stop doing shit like this to me," he chastises. 

"If you didn't worry so much I wouldn't scare you so often." 

He scowls, glaring a bit. I lean forward giving him a cheeky kiss on the corner of his mouth. His hand cups my cheek and guides my lips to his.

I've missed kissing him, his taste, his soft touch, all of it and I hate it. I hate that I enjoy his company and I hate that I enjoy him.

"Imagine what the others would say if they saw us like this." He smirks and looks me over. My breast, unbound and pressed against his chest. Our arms are wrapped around one another like lovers in our own right.

"I'd fall over and die before I'd listen to what they had to say." He buries his head in my neck, kissing softly, acting like he didn't hear me. "Let's go before the others wake up." I put my hand on the back of his neck, touching softly.

"Or we could just stay here and-"

I pull his loose hair, making him stop and draw back from me. I smirk at him. "Another time, Kenway."

I grab the oversized sweater off the floor and pull over my head, unable to see a difference with or without a binder on. Edward walks behind me and grabs my bandana, tightening it. I turn back and look into his light blue eyes, like the beach on a warm day. He smiles and leans forward, kissing me over my shoulder. 

I walk out of the bathroom looking down the hall, everyone still asleep. Damn it's early.

I walk back into the living room, laying down on my beanbag, curling under the blankets. Edward follows a few moments later, moving his bag back to how it was when the others feel asleep.

Something that flashes across the screen of the muted TV catches my eye. I grab the remote off the floor and unmute it watching as a video of our base comes on screen. 

-reports say that an unknown man attempted to plant on bomb on a naval ship this morning. It is unknown the true nature of this attack but we expect to have more details later.-

"Holy shit," Edward curses.

The others start to stir, Edward and I looking at each other. Something is wrong very wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think? I read another story about Mary Read that had her have a pet ferret and I found it so fitting I decided it add it in because the ending of the ferret in the other story breaks my heart. I hope you guys like it and I want you guys to name the ferret! Comment me a name and the one I like the most will be the new name!


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